The Way It Should Have Been
by Fantasinner
Summary: Beginning in the middle of the 6/10 episode and spinning Minx forward in a totally new direction from there. Marissa's a little wiser and Bianca's a little bolder and everyone's a little happier - and less crazy.
1. JR B Gone

**Okay so here's what you need to know first:**

**1 – I HATE soap operas with an almighty passion but have found some kind of sick obsession with Minx.**

**2 – I have never written fan fiction before in my life until the Minx Fever found me, and now it's my genuine guilty pleasure.**

**That said, I've been tossing around the following story in my head for a few weeks and spent a valuable amount of time plucking up my resolve to actually write the damn thing, having to first overcome my aversion to using other people's characters in my writing. But the Minx Fever finally prevailed when I realized just how dissatisfied I was at how the actual storyline played out. Now don't get me wrong – I thought it was beautifully portrayed and acted with the time they had to put into it and there's definitely more reasons than just those for why I fell in love with this couple in the first place. I just felt that this story had so much more potential than it was really allowed to show simply because AMC was going off the air (and maybe also because of the bigots in the big office chairs). I also felt like they wasted SO MUCH TIME with the buildup to them actually getting together and then were forced to U-Haul the shit out of them to make up for it. So in my head the more logical thing would have been for them to move faster in the beginning and slower after that, and also in my head there's no outrageous drama with JR just so that he would spiral into oblivion and shoot everyone at the end.**

**So I'm going back to before Bianca made the biggest mistake of her effing life by handing that incredible music box to Dipshit so that he would get all the credit. That was such an unfair and **_**unbelievable distraction**_** and it just makes me cringe; I also **_**know**_** that our dear Marissa is much smarter than she was given credit for where Dipshit's bullshit is concerned. So I'm starting this story right in the middle of the 6/10 episode and working forward in a completely new direction from there.**

**Oh and yeah I own nothing. Neither of these beautiful ladies nor their stories really belong to me. I'm just daydreaming here, people.**

_**JR-B-Gone**_

Marissa was so angry that seeing straight was actually becoming an issue, the blood pounding against her ears so hard that all she heard was its rapid _thump thump thump_ inside her eardrums.

_How dare him_, she thought darkly, her knuckles turning white as she gripped the steering wheel and forced herself to take a few calming breaths. _How dare he treat me like I'm just a blind fool._

The sudden chime of her cell phone ripped her from her furious reverie and at first she made no effort to retrieve it from her bag on the seat next to her, thinking immediately that it was likely to be JR calling to beg her a little bit. But she had no intention of returning to the mansion that afternoon, though when she had gotten in her car and sped away in a blind rage just minutes before she hadn't headed to the Yacht Club like she'd planned, knowing instantly that being trapped inside the stark four walls of an empty hotel room was not going to make her feel any better. But her flaring anger made the repeated chirps of her cell phone impossible to ignore and so she plunged her fingers into the bag and yanked the phone out, letting out a loud and aggravated grunt when she saw JR's name flashing at her.

"Go to hell you manipulative jackass," she muttered as she practically hurled the phone back into her bag and gripped the wheel with white knuckles again. "Take all your little tricks and shove them up your…"

Her cell phone chirped again and Marissa stopped only to cry out in frustrated rage. She snatched it back up and refused JR's call, but when it started ringing again before it even hit the seat as she tossed it aside she answered it without looking, bringing the phone to her ear as she started yelling.

"Leave me alone asswipe!" she shouted, throwing every ounce of her fiery anger into her voice. "I'm done falling for your tricks and believing your lies – you and I are through JR so now just leave me the hell alone!"

"Whoa Marissa – it's Bianca," came her friend's shocked voice over the line and Marissa immediately slammed a hand over her mouth.

"Oh my god Bianca I'm so sorry…" she started, but Bianca cut her off.

"Don't be sorry, what's wrong?" she asked, her voice dripping with instant worry and Marissa felt some of the anger leak out of her chest. "What happened with JR? Are you okay?" Marissa was shaking her head, the sudden silent tears at hearing her friend's concerned voice preventing her mouth from opening as they poured heavily from her eyes. Bianca waited patiently for a quiet moment before asking gently, "Where are you Riss?"

"Uh – on the highway just leaving the Chandler's," she answered with a watery cough as more tears stung her eyes.

"Okay – I just dropped Miranda off at a friend's and I'm at Wildwind now," Bianca told her soothingly. "I'm here if you want to come by and talk about it. Or I could meet you somewhere if you don't want to come this far…"

"No that's perfect," Marissa sputtered through a small sob. "I'll be there as soon as I can."

"Okay but Riss are you okay to drive? If you're really upset then pull over and I'll come get you."

Marissa had to laugh at her friend's overzealous caring, the swell of affection it brought to her chest a good distraction from her dissipating anger since hearing Bianca's comforting voice. "No Bianca I'll be fine, promise," she told her, sucking up her still falling tears in an attempt to keep her friend from worrying anymore. "I'll tell you about it when I get there."

"Okay, the door's open. Just make sure to get yourself here in one piece, alright?"

"Promise," Marissa told her before hanging up. As she tossed her cell phone back into her bag she clicked it on silent, finding it much easier to ignore JR's continuing stream of desperate calls and already feeling noticeably better at the prospect of heading in the direction and relief of her best friend.

/

_Okay just breathe_, Bianca thought to herself as she paced along the driveway at Wildwind, her eyes glued to the gate at the bottom of the drive which stayed torturously still. _It's only been twenty minutes. It could take longer than that to get here from the Chandler's, depending on the traffic. She's fine. She was upset and so she's probably taking it slow just to be safe…_

But none of these thoughts really helped her calm her tingling nerves and she found herself almost skipping in agitation as she walked a wide circle in front of the door. She checked her cell phone again which was clutched almost painfully in her hand, resisting the urge to call Marissa after her last seven had already gone unanswered. _That's completely explainable,_ Bianca told herself in the voice she reserved only for times when she really needed to make herself believe anything. _She was upset at JR and she thought that my call was him so she's probably just turned her phone off._

"Stop freaking out!" she said aloud, forcing herself to also stop her pacing. She sighed heavily and sat down on the front steps while trying to keep her stomach from twisting into knots.

_You know why you're so nervous,_ she thought with a bemused chuckle, her conversation with Kendall from earlier that afternoon replaying like a crisp movie in her head.

"_Binx you're not gonna know how she feels unless you talk to her," _Kendall had told her in her maddeningly wise big sistery way. "_What are you gonna do? Maybe Marissa could be the one woman in this world that makes you incredibly happy."_

And Bianca had told her sister that she was just going to cut her losses, but that was before she'd heard Marissa screaming at who she thought was JR. Had she really meant it when she said that the two of them were through or had she only shouted it in a thoughtless rage? Could it possibly be that Marissa had finally seen JR for the unchangeable scheming jerk he was always going to be?

Bianca kicked herself for what felt like the 100th time that she'd helped that same jerk start winning Marissa back when she'd suggested a date to a comedy club instead of that awful play. Guilt had followed her around ever since like a black cloud and she'd wanted to come clean to her friend but somehow never got the nerve, not after seeing Marissa's attitude toward JR shift and the light start burning in her hazel eyes again. She wanted a steady, loving home for AJ and she wanted JR to be able to provide that, so who was Bianca to tell her that was wrong? And she definitely couldn't confuse her by confessing that she'd once again fallen helplessly in love with her straight best friend.

But then Marissa had answered the phone cussing JR to high heaven, and Bianca's stomach turned over so violently that she actually had to clutch her abdomen. _"You and I are through JR…!"_

And then mercifully Bianca saw the gate to Wildwind swing inward and Marissa's car appeared, and Bianca couldn't keep herself from running out to meet Marissa where she parked, forcing her legs not to go into full-on sprint. The minute that Marissa opened the door she bolted outside and allowed herself to be scooped into the brunette's open arms, almost losing all her resolve at the comfort that washed over her as Bianca's strong arms snaked around her back.

"Good god you had me worried for a minute," Bianca whispered into the redhead's hair, holding her friend closer as she felt a quiet sob shake through her. "I was about to jump in my car and come after you if you didn't show up in five minutes. And where's your cell phone?"

Marissa laughed silently, wiping a few tears from her cheek. "Oh sorry. I was driving outrageously slow without realizing it because I was trying to calm myself down. And I turned my phone on silent because JR's been calling nonstop since I stormed out."

"Why'd you storm out?" Bianca asked, stepping away from the redhead and leading her inside. "What did he do this time?"

"He was just being the same old JR he's always been, only today I really saw it and it completely pissed me off. And then I was even more pissed off at myself for starting to fall for his bullshit again in the first place. I should have been able to see through him after everything he's done in the past, only I blinded myself for some reason," Marissa finished angrily as she and Bianca sank down onto the couch in the living room. "No actually – I know the reason. I kept trying to make JR into someone he's just not, can never really be, just because of AJ. AJ wanted his parents together and I wanted AJ to have whatever he wanted, and I thought he deserved that. A loving home – a stable home with two parents who love him. But then today I realized that that's never going to happen with JR because I would always be sacrificing my own happiness by being with him. I'm just not in love with him anymore."

"Well what happened Marissa?" Bianca asked curiously, her heart fluttering slightly at the conviction she heard in her friend's voice. "What did he do to finally make you realize all this?"

"We were going to go get ice cream with AJ," Marissa began with a deep, steadying breath. "I'd finally convinced him to hire somebody to help Scott finish the gatehouse, and to start being a little nicer to him because of everything he's been through recently. JR of course accused me of needing a buffer between us, once again flaring up with jealousy over my friendship with Scott, but I brushed past it because I wanted JR to finally get it through his bull-head that Scott deserves the support of his family. But when JR agreed the weirdest thing happened – I _knew_ he was lying. I was positive that he was only placating me again, just telling me whatever I wanted to hear without the slightest intention of following through."

Bianca nodded agreeably, urging Marissa to continue and forcing herself to stay silent until her friend was finished – she could wait another two minutes to congratulate her on finally seeing through the golden veil, right?

"So then AJ came in wanting ice cream and JR jumped up and turned it into a family outing, but I wanted to see if my suspicion was right so I made him make the phone call to the guy he was gonna hire for Scott. It seemed like he was really doing it at first but again I needed to know for sure so I walked out of the room in the middle of the call but stopped at the door to listen." Marissa paused for a minute, her eyes once again flashing with a sparkling rage that Bianca had never seen before. Slightly startled, she urged Marissa forward.

"And what did he say after you left?" she asked, and Marissa took another deep breath.

"He told the guy that he'd double his money if he made sure that the job never got done," she said despondently, and Bianca's jaw dropped open.

"What?" she exclaimed loudly. "What a dickhead! Just because he didn't want Scott moving back in the house?"

"He just didn't want to really help Scott but he wanted me to think he was being some kind of valiant hero," Marissa told her. She leaned back heavily into the couch cushions and gazed at Bianca, who sat rigidly forward trying to tame her own anger. Marissa had to grin at Bianca's constant empathy and compassion and reveled in how much better – and calmer – she felt now that she'd reached Wildwind.

"So what did you do after you heard him?" Bianca questioned her, not really sure if she was prepared for the answer because she knew that whatever had happened had caused Marissa to fly out of there in an emotional frenzy, and the pain she knew that Marissa was feeling right then made Bianca's heart ache.

"I waited for him to finish his call and then stood in the foyer until he found me there," Marissa supplied quietly, and Bianca noticed how calmly she was speaking by then, as if she were explaining how to open the refrigerator while trying not to fall asleep. "You should have seen his face though – he immediately lost all the color in his cheeks when he saw me standing there."

"_Marissa – uh Bruce said he'd be happy to help Scott finish the gatehouse," JR had said, flashing Marissa his best 'I'm completely full of shit but I want you to overlook it cuz I'm handsome' smile. Marissa merely looked at him, holding her best poker face until she got JR to back himself into a corner._

"_He said he'd be here on Monday to start helping out," JR went on somewhat awkwardly but never ceasing fire of his pearly whites. "He thinks that maybe they can have it done by Christmas…"_

"_Oh really? That soon huh?" Marissa placated him. "So then you didn't just offer to double his commission to make sure that the gatehouse wasn't even done by _next_ Christmas?" she asked squarely, the billowing rage in her stomach exploding all over the place as she spoke._

"_What? No of course not," JR tried futilely, but Marissa was having none of it._

"_Quit lying to me JR, I just heard you," she informed the smug playboy as she stepped menacingly in his direction. "You did exactly what I knew you'd do – you played me just so you could get what you wanted."_

"_Marissa I was just trying to make you happy…"_

"_No you weren't, you were playing games with me again!" Marissa shouted at him. "You haven't changed and you never will and I'm done trying to pretend otherwise. All those wonderful things you've been doing have all been one giant act just to get me to fall for you, only it's not really you! The real you is this guy – this self-involved egotistical manipulative rich kid who doesn't have one genuine bone in his body. So I'm done JR – I'm done giving you the benefit of the doubt because that's always what I'll do where you're concerned – doubt. I'm never going to trust you and I never should have in the first place. All you've ever done is break my heart but I'm not going to give you the chance to do it again."_

_She turned and walked purposefully to the door, wrenching her hand away from JR as he made a grab for it. "Marissa wait," he pleaded pathetically and Marissa only narrowly beat back the urge to whirl around and slap him. "You can't just walk out like this. You can't just walk out on AJ."_

"_How dare you suggest that I'm walking out on my son," Marissa hissed at him, using all of her energy to master the body-shaking rage that pulsed through her every time she looked at the snake in front of her. "I will _never_ walk out on AJ, I'm walking out on you JR. I'll be back for my son and my things in the morning."_

_She'd breezed out the door before giving JR another second to respond._

"Well," Bianca let out a low whistle as Marissa finished her recount, her head reeling from everything she'd just heard. "I want to say good for you but I can tell by the look on your face that you wish this had never happened."

Marissa shook her head. "No I think this has been coming for a while actually, I guess I just hoped that it wouldn't wind up with me being so angry. But I've been suspicious of JR ever since he started his ploys to win me back, only today was the first time I was able to actually catch him at it."

"I thought that maybe here recently you had changed your mind about him a little bit," Bianca ventured nervously. "I mean he did seem like he was changing for the better, you know?" Why was she defending him all of the sudden? _I have to know for sure that Marissa's thought this through,_ she thought desperately, the look in Marissa's tired eyes difficult to read.

Suddenly she sat forward and took one of Bianca's hands in her own, interlocking their fingers and Bianca shivered at her warmth. "I wanted to think he was changing, but I always knew better," she told the brunette thoughtfully as she examined their clasped hands. "He's never going to be what I need for him to be, and I couldn't make that happen no matter how hard I tried. And he's not really what I want anyway."

"What do you want Marissa?" Bianca asked instinctively, leaning forward so she could look Marissa in the eye. "What do you need to make yourself happy?"

"AJ," Marissa smiled. "AJ and a happy home for him to grow up in, with someone who makes me feel comfortable and safe and _seen_. Someone who just gets me, who I get, who I can just _be_ with. And I found none of that with JR – I've never had any of that with him," Marissa finished sadly, and Bianca felt the grip on her hands slacken. "With JR it was always – scary almost. Like I was_ always_ waiting for the other shoe to drop, to get caught up in another one of his schemes."

"You've always deserved better than JR," Bianca assured her. "And you deserve every ounce of happiness that this world has to offer, and AJ does too. And I know it may not make you feel any better right now but I'm incredibly proud of you for finally standing up to JR. You're kind of a badass sometimes, you know that?"

Marissa laughed out loud, her broad smile making Bianca's heart jump up into her throat. "Thanks, and it does make me feel better actually," she said, her eyes gleaming happily at her friend. "Nice to know I've finally done something to keep up with you and your own general badassness."

"Hey, don't get crazy," Bianca smiled back. "Just let me give you a compliment and then keep your mouth shut for once, will you?"

"Is that the polite way of telling me that I'm talking too much?"

"No that's the polite way of telling you that you should start thinking more of yourself," Bianca answered flatly. "I meant every word, Riss. You're magic and more than I want you to know that I want you to see it for yourself."

Marissa's heart started doing a series of gentle flips and her breath caught in her throat as Bianca said the word "magic," the look in her sparkling chocolate eyes sending Marissa's heart rate up at an alarming pace. All she could do was sit there in a stunned silence, all at once completely flattered and a little embarrassed, as she looked at the woman which she herself had described as "magic" on numerous occasions before. She couldn't hide the wide grin that crept up onto her face and she didn't try, allowing herself an awe-filled moment of gazing at her best friend, a woman who she once again realized she had quite a fascination with. Bianca of course noticed Marissa's change of emotions and grinned widely back, making Marissa's heart race off on her.

"What?" Bianca asked hesitantly, and Marissa just shook her head lightly.

"I don't know how you do that."

"Do what?"

Marissa had to sigh serenely at her friend's continued innocence. "Always know exactly what to say to make me feel like I can conquer the world if I want to."

Bianca blushed at Marissa's words and both women noticed, exchanging a timid chuckle as they both glanced away. "I'm just trying to be your friend Marissa, and I have to admit that I was really trying to make you feel better. Although I still won't take back anything I said."

"No it's really more than that Bianca," Marissa said with gentle conviction, eyeing her friend with a piercing gaze that rocked straight through the brunette. "I mean thirty minutes ago I was so upset I thought I was going to murder someone and now I'm sitting here on the couch smiling this goofy grin just because I'm talking to my best friend. You're amazing, and you keep surprising me every day."

"Okay you're going to have to stop that before my head pops off my shoulders, and if it gets any bigger it just might," Bianca said breathlessly, bringing her hands up to cover the deep blush that colored her whole face.

"Okay fine, let's be done with the seriousness. I'm ready to start celebrating my new freedom! Where's the tequila?"

But before Bianca got too excited at the prospect of a celebratory evening with Marissa she needed to make sure that she was in fact alright and not just putting on a brave front, so she grabbed the redhead's wrist and tugged her back down on the couch before she headed to the kitchen. She fixed her friend with a solemn stare intending to keep the conversation on track. "Before we get to that… seriously Riss, are you really okay about all this? I mean just this morning your whole attitude about JR was completely different so I don't want you to make any decisions right now just because you're completely pissed off at him. Maybe you still need a little time…"

"No Bianca, I'm done wasting time trying to sort out JR," Marissa told her gently, smiling confidently and Bianca recognized the dazzling look in her hazel eyes – it was the look of sheer conviction that the fiery redhead embraced only when feeling extremely self-assured, a look that the brunette wished she could see every single day. "And besides something snapped for me today where JR is concerned – catching him playing both sides again just finally made me see him for the person that he really is, not the suave and annoyingly charming pretty boy that he tricked me into thinking he was. But I've wised up now and the thought of going back to that mansion for anything other than to clear out my things makes me sick at my stomach." She reached forward and placed her hand on Bianca's knee, who just barely managed to cover her sharp intake of breath with a small cough. "So you can quit worrying, honestly. I feel so much better now that I've just gotten it all out there, you know? And also partly because I have your constant best friend amazingness behind me, so I'm all good."

It took Bianca a second to find her voice, having trouble remembering to breathe as her stomach started flip-flopping around her abdomen again at the feeling of Marissa's searing palm against her jeans. She heaved a heavy, dumbfounded sigh, completely unable to rip her eyes from the endless shimmering pools of Marissa's. _She was really done with JR now… and she was really okay about it…_

"What about AJ?" Bianca finally managed to sputter out, and it was Marissa's turn to sigh again.

"He's going to be disappointed I know," she said gloomily, "but hopefully he'll understand with a little bit of time. And god knows that JR is probably twisting the situation around as we speak – I ran out of the mansion before AJ got back downstairs and now I'm sure JR is filling his head with whatever color he's going to paint this."

"Well we could always go over and get him," Bianca suggested. "The girls are both at sleepovers tonight but he could stay in the playroom. You could stay in the guest room if you wanted, too."

"That sounds perfect, I'd much rather stay here tonight than have to check into a lonely hotel room, but I think it'd be best if I left AJ alone, for tonight anyway. Plus I don't want to go sweeping back into the mansion and take AJ away and give JR a chance to twist it into me kidnapping him or something. Regardless of my ire with him I'm going to have to play nice because I don't want to lose our joint custody arrangement."

"Yeah I guess that's smart," Bianca agreed, having to keep her eyes trained on the rug to keep Marissa from seeing her instant giddiness upon realizing that the two of them would be alone that night. Child-free evenings were a rare treat for the pair, and the prospect of being able to have margaritas and watch a movie that wasn't made by Pixar made Bianca smile like a big kid herself.

After a moment of comfortable silence Bianca turned back to face the redhead, who had evidently been peering at her with a crooked grin on her happy face. "What?" the brunette questioned.

"You realize what this means don't you?" Marissa asked, her coy smile making Bianca's breath catch in her throat. She shook her head, momentarily afraid of every single thing that could possibly come out of her friend's mouth, but Marissa leaned forward and started laughing wildly. "It means we're not on mom duty tonight!" she bellowed happily, leaping off the couch and skipping blissfully to the kitchen. "Now where's the tequila? I'll make the margaritas while you pick out a trashy movie."

But as Marissa skipped out of sight Bianca merely leaned back into the plush cushions of the couch and ogled the fact that once again her best friend's thoughts had practically mirrored her own and took a moment in the sudden silence of the vaulted living room to recollect herself.

_Okay just breathe,_ she repeated to herself for the second time that night, only this time she did it to help cool the nerves which had erupted for an entirely different reason. But Marissa's words kept ringing in her ears and made it impossible for the brunette to settle the raging storm in her stomach.

"_I feel so much better now that I've just gotten it all out there, you know?_" Yes Marissa – she did know.

_I still can't say anything tonight,_ she told herself with confident resolve, understanding immediately that what Marissa needed the most right then was a friend, and that's exactly what Bianca wanted to do for her. _It will wait… but maybe not too much longer_, she thought finally, pulling herself from the couch and making her way to the high shelf for their evening movie selection.

/

Marissa was in a state of shock at the complete 180 degree turnaround that her mood had taken since the moment she saw Bianca waiting for her as she'd pulled up to Wildwind and took a brief moment in the empty kitchen to relish this new feeling of contentment.

_I'm finally free of JR,_ she thought with a wistful sigh. _I'm really going to just put it all behind me, after all this time._ She practically danced around the kitchen to the bar and began gleefully digging for the booze, immediately locating all the required ingredients for a batch of her special homemade margaritas. As she loaded the hooch into the blender her mind began drifting to the brunette whom she heard rummaging around in the living room and the involuntary smile that leapt onto the redhead's face almost made her backtrack for a moment. _That's why I'm okay right now,_ she thought abruptly, turning to take a peek at Bianca through the doorway and giggling slightly as she stood with ten different movies in her hands and a very serious expression on her face. _What a friend that woman is, and how lucky am I that she seems to care so much about me?_

"If only she were a man," Marissa mused aloud, cocking an eyebrow at the spinning green concoction in the blender. But as soon as the words left her lips Marissa jerked compulsively and slammed her hands against the counter to steady herself, the wave of chills that coursed through her body nearly making her knees buckle. _But Bianca is flawless the way she is,_ the redhead thought immediately, and the image of trying to make the graceful perfection that was her best friend into a clumsy burly man made Marissa cringe.

"But…" she whispered, the sound lost over the rattling buzz of the blender. "Bianca's a…"

But Marissa shook her head vigorously and discarded the thought before she said it out loud. _No,_ she told herself sternly. _I will _not_ allow myself to go there just because Bianca's gay. I refuse to place either of us inside that particular stereotype._

But as Marissa finally killed the noise of the blender and poured its contents into glasses she found herself completely unable to shake the new realization that had suddenly filled her mind:

_I would be blissfully happy to spend every night like this with Bianca,_ she thought, stopping dead in the doorway to peer wide-eyed at her friend who still stood intensely weighing options for movies. Marissa didn't actually walk back into the living room until she felt the painful chill of the frozen margaritas in her hands, and when she finally moved into the room she couldn't clear her mind of an entirely new thought – _What in the world have I been missing?_


	2. And Speaking of Forevermore

**Okay I have a few things to say –**

**First, holy hell thanks for the warm welcome into the fandom. As a fanfiction virgin who so recently cashed in her card I can now honestly say that my first time was utterly satisfying. Gracias and merci à vous.**

**Second, your over-kind reviews are so very greatly appreciated – and feedback or suggestions will always be welcome.**

**Third, to my anonymous new friend **_**lytab5**_**, I was actually thrilled that you picked up on Bianca's nickname for Marissa as I have very specific reasons for including it, not the least of which being that I wanted to add an extra level of camaraderie between our two favorite girls and I'm a believer in the casual nickname clause, which I believe the AMC writers sort of overlooked. Kind of a small thing, but there you go. You'll also notice Marissa's nickname for Bianca in the following chapter, and I'll continue using both as I write more.**

**And lastly, a thousand apologies for ending where I did but I swear to you that I won't keep you waiting too much longer. Though as I already said, this fanfiction thing is merely a guilty pleasure of mine and so it will not continue to take precedence over my actual work, but I promise not to leave you hanging painfully before I at least get to the really good part.**

**K – done with the rant. Onward.**

_**And Speaking of Forevermore…**_

"I'm fairly certain that movie wasn't really worth the five bucks I paid for it," Bianca laughed happily as she stumbled after Marissa onto the back porch, the warm night air making her take a compulsive deep breath as she felt a bit more of her sobriety return._ I must be such a lightweight,_ she thought blandly. _If I'm this bad after just one margarita. Either that or Riss just got a little tequila-happy…_

"I didn't think it was that bad," Marissa replied good-naturedly, sinking down next to Bianca on the outdoor sofa. "I mean, the part about the rocket-launchers was a little out there, but the scene with the sperm whales was kind of…"

But Bianca burst out laughing so loudly that Marissa couldn't finish her thought, watching as her friend bent at the waist and lost herself in an uncontrolled laughing fit and by the time Bianca had tears streaking down her face Marissa had joined in as well.

"You do realize that you just used the terms 'rocket-launchers' and 'sperm whales' in the same sentence in defense of a movie," Bianca finally sputtered out, her laughter only multiplying as Marissa's equally infectious giggles joined her own. "Are you still going to stand by your 'I didn't think it was that bad' or would you like to make an amendment?"

"No I'll amend it, you're right," Marissa chuckled, wiping her own tears that had streaked her eyeliner. "That movie was one of the worst I've ever seen."

"Yeah maybe next time we should reverse roles," Bianca suggested. "You pick the movie and I'll make the margaritas that won't make me fall over with one sip."

"They weren't that strong!" Marissa defended herself, though she had to admit that she may have poured a little too heavily with both the tequila and the Grand Marnier, her thoughts while mixing the ingredients a little more scattered than normal…

"They were a little potent," Bianca teased her. "Although don't get me wrong I drank every last drop."

"Lush," Marissa said with a playful nudge to Bianca's ribs, who burst out in another fit of giddy laughter and grabbed her side dramatically and Marissa couldn't help but join in again, both women suddenly laughing so hysterically that after a few minutes they were each clutching their stomachs.

"Whew okay I've got to stop before I pass out – I'm already getting the spins," Bianca heaved after a while, launching herself back up onto the couch properly as she'd partially slid off in her cheerful frenzy and she landed against the cushions with a soft _thwomp_.

"Ahh – thanks Bee, that's exactly what I needed tonight," Marissa said airily, sinking herself down comfortably next to Bianca. Both women folded their legs up underneath them and their bare feet intertwined in the small space of the couch.

"What – to watch what is arguably the worst movie ever conceived by people who make too much money?" Bianca asked playfully, but Marissa shook her head.

"No, to laugh like two school-girls at a slumber party with my best friend," Marissa told her, making sure to follow it up with her widest and sincerest smile. "Do you know that you've been my only real source of happiness outside of AJ for months?"

She said it before she filtered it and the immediate realization that she'd let it slip caused her eyes to grow to the size of discs as she stared in silent horror at her friend, who went suddenly rigid from her deep trench inside the plush cushions. Marissa opened her mouth to try to say something but absolutely nothing came to mind and so she just sat there with her mouth hanging in a small "o" as she waited for the brunette to react.

_Did she really just say that?_ Bianca thought wildly, feeling all her muscles suddenly tense at Marissa's words but completely unable to do anything about it. Her breathing hitched but she forced her body to grudgingly unclench, not wanting the instant embarrassment she saw flash onto the redhead's face to ruin the comfortable rapport they'd had going. She chuckled quietly and forced her eyes up to meet Marissa's. "Ditto," she said with a smile, relaxing completely again when she felt her friend's muscles do the same. "Except, you know, flip Mimo and Gabby for AJ. Although he definitely still makes the list."

Marissa smiled weakly at Bianca and allowed herself to settle down inside what the brunette had managed to make a comfortable silence, twirling a strand of her slick red hair between her fingers as she gazed upward at the star-studded night sky.

_Okay, Marissa Tasker, quit breathing so damn hard or else Bianca's going to think you're having a heart attack, _she told herself evenly, but the end result was her only becoming more winded as her nose started whistling every time she forced a tense breath and eventually she was left with her mouth slightly open, breathing like she had a sinus infection. _She didn't completely freak out at your embarrassing confession so you're really fine, there's nothing at all wrong with whatever it is that's happening tonight. Bianca's your best friend – whatever is going on with me will be okay with her… But what the hell is going on with me?_

_Breathe, breathe, close mouth, breathe…_

_Okay – it's no big thing that your feet are snuggled up underneath Bianca's, that's not any big deal. We do that all the time when we sit out here together, so that is completely normal. Right – her warm, smooth feet covering mine is supposed to feel this… tingly. And then of course it's perfectly normal for me to sit here obsessing over Bianca's feet..._

_If I could mentally slap myself then I should probably do that right about now… good god, quit fooling yourself Tasker, or else you'll only wind up miserable again like you did with JR. What's so scary about facing this possibility?_

"Nothing," she breathed aloud, and Bianca's head rose slightly off her hand, obviously returning from her own star-stricken trance.

"What?" she asked the redhead, registering immediately the glossy look in her eye that meant only that Marissa had just taken off somewhere.

"- what? Oh… nothing," Marissa mumbled, glad for the darkness outside that hid the slight blush she knew had risen to her cheeks. "I was just… losing myself." Bianca nodded knowingly as Marissa's silent thought corrected herself again. _Maybe more like finding myself_.

"You know this _is_ a good porch for doing some quality thinking," Bianca pondered aloud pleasantly. "I've had many good thoughts on this very couch."

"Hmm, you know I quite agree with you," Marissa replied wryly, playing along with Bianca's faux-meditative musings. "There's not a thought that's crossed my mind that hasn't had me questioning the very meaning of life, and it has all to do with this very porch."

"Ah yes – the Thinking Porch," Bianca dubbed it with a sardonic look of declaration. "As it shall henceforth be known."

"Hear hear," Marissa agreed, raising a hand into the air in mini-celebration. Bianca brought her own up and their knuckles gently grazed together, each pulling back fingers that were hyper-aware of the slight touch.

"So where did you get to just now?" Marissa inquired curiously, finding that despite her escalating inner chaos at her puzzling – and absolutely terrifying – new daydreams she was actually calmer when talking to Bianca, her constant steadiness and comfort more than enough to get Marissa to jigger the hell down no matter how worked up she got. And as Bianca replied Marissa felt that same tranquility wash over her again, a feeling that only escalated the flood of emotion that had started boiling in the pit of her stomach.

"I was actually just thinking about what I'm going to tell Ryan about his judgment in movie suggestions," Bianca replied with a half-lie – she _had_ been thinking about Ryan's awful taste in films when she'd heard Marissa whisper something, but for the large majority of the silence before that she had been lost in her own growing terror of the woman sitting beside her.

_Don't be ridiculous, you're not scared of Marissa_, she assured herself sternly, feeling her fingers bunch into fists. _Marissa is my best friend – she genuinely cares about me. In fact she cares about me more than anyone else ever has – she's become a better friend than anyone before. I recognize her; there's something between us that's familiar – easy. Simple. There's a connection there that… that I'm terrified of losing. _That's_ what I'm scared of. Of trying to make more out of this just because I want to see it that way. Marissa's straight – she's good at being straight and she likes it. Or at least I think she does – I've never actually asked her outright. I feel like that could be an awkward conversation…_

'_Hey Marissa, I know this is kind of out of the blue but would you ever consider switching teams at all? I'm not curious for myself or anything… I was just… just wondering because of… you know… general curiosity… in a general way… having nothing to do with the fact that I'm a lesbian. Swear.'_

_No, definitely better to just keep my mouth closed a little longer,_ Bianca almost smirked. _She's never shown any interest at all in anything related to the ways of the lesbians and the last thing I need is to chase off another friend with some dramatic declaration of love._

"Yo – earth to Bianca," came Marissa's voice, startling the brunette from her contemplation and her eyes snapped upward, her breath immediately hitching painfully at the beautiful spectacle that was Marissa in the soft light of a glowing moon. "You keep getting lost on me – are you okay?"

"No yeah – I'm fine," Bianca tried to say convincingly but her voice cracked slightly on the words and Marissa raised a bemused eyebrow.

"'No yeah'?" she challenged lightly. "Isn't one a complete negation of the other?"

"Ugh, don't use big words tonight Riss – it's Friday and my brain doesn't want to have to keep up with you."

"Ooh… apologies. Just tell me where you keep running off to. The look on your face makes it obvious that there's something pretty heavy on your mind."

_Oh do you mean the fact that I'm madly in love with you and can't tell you because I'm petrified of losing you?_ Bianca thought listlessly as different words tumbled from her mouth. "I'm just wondering what you're planning on doing after you move out of the mansion again," she lied, completely oblivious to the way Marissa's face fell at her words, too preoccupied with gazing intently at her own knees so she wouldn't give herself away.

"Oh," Marissa sighed. _I thought that maybe you were trying to figure out why the hell there's this weirdly charged energy around us right now._ "I haven't thought that far yet – I've been having too much fun with you. But I guess I'll get a temporary room at the Yacht Club for a while until I can find a place of my own. I really don't want to move back into the Martin's again."

_Or I could just tell you I'm in love with you and then you and AJ could move in with us – problem solved. _"Yeah that's probably a good idea," Bianca quietly agreed. "Just as long as you get out from under JR's thumb as soon as possible. Don't let him guilt you into forgiving him this time."

_Why are we still talking about JR?_ Marissa wondered. _He is _so_ not what I want to focus on right now_. "I won't Bianca, I swear. This time I feel like there's really nothing to forgive – I've seen him for what he's always going to be and so it's over. End of story."

_Any chance that you'll possibly start seeing me a little differently too with this newfound clarity?_ Bianca thought desperately before swiftly shutting it down. She took a deep breath. "I'm glad to hear that, really. You have no idea how wonderful it is to see you this sure of yourself after everything JR's put you through."

_Sure of myself? HA!_ "Well… I think the only safe assumption I can make about my future is that I will never again fall prey to JR Chandler."

"I'd call that progress," Bianca replied, offering the very serious looking redhead a reassuring smile. Marissa nodded slowly, her hazel eyes fixed heavily on her friend's face as if in a pensive trance, completely incapable of looking away from the dawning realization that coursed through every single bone in her body.

_Whoa – _she thought dreamily, her mind momentarily falling utterly still as she gazed at her gorgeous friend reclined so comfortably right beside her, unable to form a coherent thought for the long expanse of time in which she sat there unmoving, blinking only occasionally so as not to disrupt what she realized was quite possibly the most incredible view she'd ever seen. _This is my comfort. I hate this drafty old mansion but somehow with Bianca inside it it very easily feels like – home. How in the hell have I missed all of this – this whole time?_

_Huh – I thought I'd decided to quit fooling myself. I've missed nothing, but I've spent a good deal of time running from it. Running back to JR just to reassure myself, but every time just chomping at the bit to see Bianca again. And after Ricky… _Her heart started pumping double-time as Ricky's evil face slid across her beautiful reverie making her inhale sharply. Bianca noticed but merely grinned reassuringly again, her heavy eyes mirroring Marissa's making the redhead wonder if perhaps she was reliving the same horror as well. Her eyes drifted down to Bianca's wrists and a painful chill crawled down her back like a swarm of fire ants when she saw the puffy remainders of her wounds and Marissa's jaw clenched in reflex. _How dare he hurt her,_ she thought savagely, the blazing anger from earlier that evening returning instantly with a vengeance and she allowed herself a brief moment of mental retaliation against the monster who had hurt a woman who had already been through so much, grinning almost wickedly as the images of what she'd like to do to him danced through her head. But as quickly as they came they were gone again, Marissa's countenance shifting easily back into quietude as thoughts of Ricky dissolved against the stunning backdrop of Bianca's peaceful face.

_Why has it taken me so long to finally allow myself to see what's been right in front of my nose? I mean, who do I always want to see at the end of the day, no matter how it's gone? If I'm having a bad time then I want Bianca there to talk me through it; if I'm having the best day of my life then I want Bianca there to share it with me. AJ and Miranda are best friends and Bianca loves my son like her own – she loves everyone so unconditionally and she's supported me through everything. We got each other through that nightmare and tonight's the first time that I've seen that old familiar spark come back into her incredible chocolate eyes, her impenetrable strength finally bouncing her back after her struggles this morning in the hotel room…_

"Oh my god Bianca you were going to tell me something this morning," Marissa said, suddenly sitting bolt upright as she ripped herself out of her daze. "At the Yacht Club earlier when I had to run out and save JR – what were you going to tell me?"

_Oh shit_ – Bianca's stomach bottomed out, her eyes skating from side to side as she tried to figure out which direction she should go with her answer.

_I could lie again…_ she thought languidly, but the idea of just looping around in another giant circle made her feel like she could throw up. Unfortunately the prospect of spilling the truth seemed like it would likely cause the same effect. _No – just tell her the truth you scared little hypocrite. Quit running all the time and quit holding all your past pain against Marissa; you've already figured out that she's different. She's different from all of them…_

_But she's straight! _the annoyingly logical side of her brain protested loudly.

_Yeah – and so was Maggie…_

_Okay stop it. Once again you cannot hold Marissa accountable for someone else's mistakes._

_But you also can't assume that she'll react well to this… A life-long straight girl hearing a confession of attraction from a gay girl would send anybody into a tailspin…_

_But this is _Marissa_. Why do I have to keep reminding myself of that? That in itself says everything._

_But you've been sitting here in a silent funk for the past ten minutes trying to dissect every look that crossed Marissa's face, scouring her perfect details for anything that might indicate that she too is aware of this cotton-thick energy that's settled over this couch ever since we sat down..._

_And where is this energy coming from exactly? Am I somehow creating it… no. Shut that down. It takes two people to create a feeling like this, only am I feeling the same thing that she is? She's not telling me something… something about her face during our discussion earlier told me that she wasn't really saying everything that was on her mind._

_Kind of like yourself, hypocrite._

"Uh – hello in there…" Marissa interjected timidly when Bianca still hadn't looked at her after almost two minutes. "Once again you've flown off someplace and it's starting to worry me. Tell me what's on your mind."

"It's… it's not really a big deal, I promise. You don't have to worry," Bianca assured her, although the painful jab in her lower abdomen reprimanded her for lying again. "I just… I was having a hard time this morning, that's all."

"Yeah I kind of gathered that," Marissa said with a bemused grin, raising an eyebrow in question. "So then why don't you talk to me about it? I mean if there's anyone who can help you deal with your lingering fear after the attack it'd be me right? Cuz – you know – I just might have had the same kind of experience. Plus you're my best friend – nobody means more to me in this world and I hate seeing you hurt like this."

Bianca's lungs filled with air which she held in until she couldn't any longer, her whole body reacting to the compassion that dripped from the redhead's mouth. "I… I'm not really… It's not exactly… dealing with the attack that I'm having trouble with," she finally managed to say, her whole body becoming suddenly granite-still as she spoke, realizing that she was maybe – finally – on the verge of starting to speak the truth to the one person who she really needed to hear it.

"Then what is it?" Marissa asked, leaning forward slightly and Bianca had to force herself not to slide away so that she wouldn't lose the last lingering feathers of her resolve. "Bianca whatever it is you can tell me. Like I tried to tell you before, there isn't anything that you can say that will change the way I feel about you." _Although they've already changed,_ she finished internally, this time allowing a small smile to creep to her lips at the thought. She had a brief moment of raging desire to lean into the brunette and take her stunning face in her hands to comfort her, smiling wider still at the realization that she wouldn't be opposed to closing the distance between them entirely… _No – focus on Bianca right now. She's struggling with something and you need to be here for her. Whatever you're feeling can wait to be talked about – Bianca's wellbeing is frontrunner to everything._

"I… I'm just… I'm trying to get some things sorted out in my head," Bianca told her lamely. "I can't… it's not something that's easy for me to…"

"For you to what?" Marissa encouraged her after her voice trailed off, finally sitting all the way forward and taking Bianca's hands in hers again. Only this time when their fingers entwined a shockwave pulsed through both sets of arms as two pairs of eyes locked onto the small embrace, each gazing in a stunned daze at their fingers wrapped so easily together.

_Okay – ignore the burning feeling of Bianca's hands in yours, stay focused,_ Marissa told herself as steadily as she could manage through the hazy cloud that instantly filled her brain._ Probably a bad idea under the circumstances to touch her, but you can't pull back now so you can get a hold of yourself again…_

_Stay focused here Bianca, _the brunette was telling herself with an equal amount of forced determination. _You've held hands with her before… this is nothing new. Only she really picked a bad time to test my self-control while I'm right in the middle of coming out with an insane confession…_

"Bianca…?" Marissa started again, her voice a gentle whisper that the brunette barely heard. Marissa dipped her head low until she was able to see Bianca's eyes and she tried to give her friend a look that said "it's going to be okay" but the strained look in her ever-expressive brown eyes made the redhead falter, once again losing herself in her own abrupt clarity.

_Holy shit – I've fallen in love with her,_ she realized with a sudden roaring clearness, trying to keep her eyes from widening to the size of baseballs as Bianca's finally lifted to meet them. She felt like a giant boulder landed with a painful crash on her chest as fragmented thoughts zoomed around her brain, realization after realization hurtling at her heart like gunfire. _Seeing her in this kind of pain is literally hurting me. She's the most incredible woman I've ever known – will ever know. All the comfort and safety I've been desperately searching for has been right here all along with me just too blind to see it. I've actually fallen in love with my best friend…_

"Marissa I…" Bianca tried to say, but seeing the redhead's hazel eyes flare suddenly she stopped herself. "… what? What's wrong?"

"Erm… uh… ahem… nothing," Marissa stammered, but Bianca knew from the stunned look on her face that she was lying again.

"No, it's definitely not nothing," Bianca pressed, thankful for the small distraction so that she could – once again – put off her own feelings. "What's wrong?"

"There's nothing at all wrong, Bianca," Marissa said with a smile, gently squeezing her friend's hands tighter. _Everything is absolutely perfect actually._ "We're talking about you. Please tell me what's been bothering you so much lately. If it's not the attack then what is it?"

Bianca sighed heavily. _What now?_ "It's just… I'm really… everything's kind of…" but Bianca couldn't force herself to go on no matter how hard she tried, the words catching at the back of her throat every time she opened her mouth. She realized that her hands were shaking inside Marissa's comforting clasp and she squeezed involuntarily to steady them, her heart soaring into the starry sky when she felt her friend's return the gesture. _Good god just open your damn mouth!_ she shrieked inside her head. _This is Marissa – it's not like she's going to go screaming into the night if you tell her how you feel!_

_But I can't just _say_ it like this,_ she realized suddenly. _I can't just throw it out there in the middle of nowhere and just see how she reacts. What am I supposed to say? How am I supposed to explain to her that I fell in love with her without even realizing it?_

And then suddenly she heard Kendall's voice echoing in her memory, once again recalling their conversation from that afternoon.

"_Okay, I don't know Marissa that well, but maybe she's still in love with JR," she'd said. "Maybe not. _Maybe_ she's in love with you."_

"_I'm glad we've narrowed that down."_

"_What I'm saying is Binx; you don't have to _ask_ her. Just give her the music box and see how she reacts. Maybe then you'll get your answer."_

"I have something for you," Bianca said, instantly returned from her daydream and overjoyed at the realization that she did have another option. _"This could be the most important gift you've ever given anyone in your whole life…"_

"Uh – what?" Marissa asked her, completely thrown. "I thought you were going to tell me…"

"It'll wait," Bianca told her airily, rising from the couch and releasing Marissa's hands. "I'll be right back…"

As Marissa watched her glide around the couch and disappear quickly into the house she couldn't keep the shocked confusion at bay as she tried to ignore how cold her hands felt without Bianca's in them. "What the hell just happened?" she asked into the still night. A cricket chirped in response and Marissa sighed heavily.

_She's like a bank vault,_ she thought sullenly. _She locks her feelings away and acts like everything's fine just because she doesn't want anyone to worry about her. Well I'm not _worrying_ about her – I don't have to worry that Bianca will find the strength to overcome whatever this is because I know it's already there. I'm just trying to _care_ for her and she's not letting me._

_No Tasker – you're trying to_ love_ her…_

Marissa leaned back into the cushions again, allowing them to swallow her and muffle the gentle sounds of the night. She wrapped her arms tightly around herself to beat back the chill that coursed through every nerve in her body, though it had nothing at all to do with the warm breeze that drifted across the backyard.

_Settle down. Calm your nerves. Breathe. Quit freaking out over all this and be strong for Bianca – she needs you right now._

_But I'm not freaking out – I'm finally seeing clearly for the first time in my whole life…_

And with that blissful thought Marissa unconsciously began to hum quietly, the smooth tones of her voice mixing harmoniously with the natural symphony of the peaceful night.

"All through the night, near and far, we will be together…" she sang, and her body reacted to the melody. Her muscles relaxed, the tension of the past few hours melting out of her limbs like lava, and she breathed a serene sigh. "So hush – don't you cry. In my arms we will be together – forevermore."

/

"Get a freaking grip on yourself," Bianca breathed into the stale air inside the foyer, making a beeline for the table where she'd left her purse and the gift bag with the music box inside. As her fingers hooked around the ribbon handles of the bag her stomach turned over violently and she almost dropped it, reflexively clutching her abdomen. _Okay really Bianca – enough with the dramatics. It's not like I'm declaring war or something; this is not an awful thing to admit. And you're not even _admitting_ anything – you're giving your best friend a present, a present that you bought her before you ever really realized the real reason why you found it in the first place…_

She forced her legs to cooperate and turned around as quickly as she'd come, crossing back through the house while mustering every ounce of her remaining gumption. But as she approached the open back door she could just make out what sounded like soft music coming from outside, and she immediately recognized the melodic hum of Marissa's pure voice.

"All through the night, near and far, we will be together…" Bianca heard her sing. The air inside her chest slammed outward painfully as Bianca held it in, the sound of Marissa's low yet completely breathtaking song momentarily stealing her ability to breathe properly. "So hush – don't you cry. In my arms we will be together – forevermore," she finished quietly before continuing on, and as she did Bianca reached instinctively into the bag in her hands and pulled out the box inside. Silently she lifted its contents from the tissue paper and tossed the bag aside, stepping out into the warmth of the backyard to rejoin her friend as her fingers pulled the top from the porcelain music box and wound it up.

The music floated into the still air and joined seamlessly with Marissa's soft tune, but the redhead soon fell silent as she turned slowly around and locked eyes with the woman behind her.


	3. Tell Me Now

**I believe you all to be far too kind in your reviews and I've spent the past twenty minutes sitting here blushing at my computer. But once again I thank you with a grateful flourish…**

**Now to business –**

**You're going to kill me – and this time for real real. I ended it at a truly atrocious part again but at least be thankful that we're progressing. I really wasn't expecting to get so tied up in this fanfiction madness and my desire to get chapters out is now vastly depleting my output of things that I should actually be doing. I really had planned on continuing a bit further in this chapter but I didn't have enough time and once I got to the point where I ended it I thought "what the hell – let's drive everybody bonkers just for fun." Terribly sorry, but I'll make up for it next time. Just… you know – don't get too hopeful about the shenanigans our girls are going to get into on this night. Call me an old-fashioned homosexual but I don't believe that every couple jumps into bed together on the first night, and besides I haven't quite decided just how far I'm going to let everyone see into their bedroom. I was a fanfic virgin and I'm also an adult romance virgin, though ah – I'm not unwilling to cash in under the right circumstances. But whatever that will entail will follow in a later chapter.**

**Unfortunately though I have no idea when I'll have time to write on this again, but rest assured – it will be coming. I've now caught the Fanfic Fever on top of my Minx ailment and will continue to be sick with both until this story is at least satisfied, and I have not a clue when that will be either. I have LOTS of plans though, and now knowing there are others who are just as hungry for all things Minx-flavored my mind is buzzing on overload.**

**So once again I apologize for the cliffhanger but you'll soon see that I'm an avid fan of the punch-to-the-gut ending – it makes the buildup all the more exciting for all us sufferers of the Minx virus.**

_**Tell Me Now**_

"What… what is that?" Marissa whispered, all the blood rushing to her face until even her ears felt hot. Her vision spiraled for a moment around the image of Bianca standing there with something in her hands, something that was sending the tinkling music of the song – her song – into the crisp late-evening air. "Is that… Forevermore?"

Bianca smiled timidly and crossed the porch while Marissa's eyes followed her, unblinking hazel orbs never leaving the brunette's face as she rejoined her on the couch. "Yeah it is," she told the redhead quietly, careful to avoid eye contact. "You know – after everything that you've been through recently and especially after all that mess with Ricky I just thought that it would be nice for you to be able to hear it whenever you needed. And – I don't know – I found this music box in an antique store and I just thought that I'd get it for you, and then I managed to track down a guy who could put your song in it for me. I mean – when you were singing this in the closet it really did make me feel so much better, and I just thought that since you shared it with me that I'd… I don't know… try to say thanks I guess. For everything."

As she finished she sucked in a loud breath before she could stop it, having almost run out of air completely as she'd rambled nervously on, never quite finding the courage to look any higher than Marissa's collarbone. _Oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god…_

"I… that's… ahem… it's…" Marissa tried repeatedly to articulate properly but her tongue had partially quit working on her and so she sat there with her mouth hanging open again as she sputtered incoherently.

"There's really no obligation to use it or anything…" Bianca immediately backtracked, briefly losing the ability to rationalize Marissa's reaction in her overwrought apprehension. Bianca had no idea whether that dumbfounded expression on her face was there because she was simply surprised at receiving a gift or whether it meant that she was trying to find something polite to say about a present she obviously thought was stuffed full of overenthusiastic cheese. "And you might not even like antique stuff like this… it's no big deal if you don't…"

"Bianca could you shut up for just a second please?" Marissa cut in abruptly, her temporary stutter completely absent. Bianca's gaze snapped involuntarily upward as she fell jarringly silent, all the wind rushing from her lungs with a near-painful _whoosh_ as the sparkling eyes of her friend found hers and locked them there.

_She found me a music box with my dad's song inside,_ the redhead's mind raced, finally able to wrap itself around coherence once Bianca's voice quit bombarding her. _She found me a music box with my dad's song inside…_ "You… you had this made for me?" she asked, her voice a raspy croak as she swallowed down the torrent of feelings that threatened to burst out of everywhere.

"Well… yeah in a way I guess I did," Bianca admitted sheepishly, replacing the ceramic top carefully as the song finally ran out. "It wasn't really any big deal…"

"Not a big deal?" Marissa asked disbelievingly, reaching forward and holding the music box as well as Bianca's slightly shaking hands in hers. "Bianca this is… this is by far the most incredible gift that anyone has ever gotten me," she told her breathlessly, staring in wide-eyed wonder at the angel she saw sitting in front of her. "This is just… it's so immeasurably thoughtful … I can't – I can't even talk right now Bee."

"You don't have to say anything," Bianca assured her kindly. "I just wanted you to have it."

"Exactly…" Marissa breathed, feeling her head nod in disbelief but not really aware of it. "You just wanted me to have it because you knew what it would mean to me… because you know me." Bianca smiled weakly in response, the cherry blush creeping back to her cheeks and Marissa watched it come in the white glow of the moon, her stomach jumping up into her chest or her heart falling down into her toes – she had no idea which. All she felt was the red-hot blast of uncontrolled euphoria as it exploded everywhere inside her body and suddenly every moment she'd ever spent with Bianca flashed through her head like a swirling slideshow, every time that they'd been together without realizing that they were together.

_Oh my god she's in love with me too – she has to be. She's not dealing with fear of Ricky – she's dealing with fear of me. She's pulling back every time I touch her – and I've touched her more often than usual because I've wanted to be nearer to her. Why have I run from this? Where in the world could possibly be safer than wherever Bianca is? She cares about me and… and she _sees_ me. And she's now giving me this… this…_

"Bianca…" Marissa breathed her name, the sudden swell of tears robbing her of her voice, and Bianca leaned in closer and the redhead gasped slightly as she gently squeezed her hands.

_Oh my god what in the world is she thinking right now?_ Bianca screamed inside her head while forcing her face to stay calm as she tried to comfort her friend who had so unexpectedly begun crying. Her right hand intuitively untangled itself from Marissa's fingers and lifted to her face, gently brushing her thumb across her glorious cheekbones to catch the tears before they fell. She felt Marissa shiver, the slight pulse igniting her fingertips and she felt the shockwave jump into her own body and course down her spine. Their eyes locked together, mere inches between them, each woman momentarily losing herself to the infinite tunnels of the other's eyes, each woman seeing so clearly all the way to its end.

As Bianca's hand started to fall away Marissa took it once again inside her own, their palms pressing together the raging heat that instantly sprung up between them and both were hyper-aware of it. "Bianca – please tell me the truth now," Marissa finally emboldened herself to say, and Bianca's eyelids flickered madly.

"Wha – what do you mean?" she asked almost inaudibly, and Marissa was positive that she heard the terrified catch in her voice.

"What you've needed to talk to me about… what you're trying to say with this incredible music box. Tell me the truth now Bianca – I need to hear you say it." _She's scared of this – and of course she is. After everything she's been through, after all the times she's had her heart shattered by idiots who really knew _nothing_ about what they were giving up, of course that's why she's still playing dumb. But she knows – she can feel it just as strongly as I can. All she needs now is to say it out loud… and oh my god I can't wait to hear it…_

"You need to hear me say… what?" Bianca breathed, her chest heaving with the effort of speaking and trying not to pass out. _What I'm trying to say with the music box? She's figured it out… she's put two and two together. The music box, my jumpiness around her – she was bound to figure it out! She can read me like a freaking book and now I'm backed into a corner… but isn't this what I needed to happen? Isn't that why you decided to give it to her in the first place? To see how she would react…?_

_Tell me that you're in love with me,_ Marissa pleaded silently with the brunette as she gazed imploringly into the shining chocolate pools of her eyes. "Whatever you want to say Bianca," she whispered aloud. "I want to hear whatever you want to say."

Bianca forced a painful breath, her chest so constricted with paralyzing terror that every lungful felt like it was competing against tight leather straps. _Here it is… moment of truth. Just charge forward and let the chips fall…_

_But that look… that glimmer in those beautiful eyes that have been staring at me since the moment I sat down… Is that a – pleading look? Could that possibly be – hope in her magical gaze?_

"Marissa…" Bianca began quietly, her voice gravelly with overexposed emotion, but despite her sudden upswing in possible confidence she still couldn't think of the right words to say. None of the English she knew would come close to describing it properly and so she was left to stare silently at her friend for a long moment, after which the redhead smiled gently.

_That's how she's supposed to say my name,_ Marissa thought euphorically as fireworks went off in her chest at the sound of her name falling so ardently from Bianca's incredible mouth. _She as good as admitted it right there. She's in love with me. _"Bianca this isn't a gift that you give to someone who you just want to be friends with," she encouraged her softly. "This – this is a gift that you give to someone who you love deeply. This is a gesture filled with so much love that I can't even comprehend it. So tell me what you're trying to tell me because I've really already heard what you're saying."

"I do love you deeply Riss – you have to know that," Bianca admitted quickly, glad to finally finish a sentence and she charged on before her voice went MIA again. "I love you so so much and so I can't – I can't lose you. I don't want things to change if it means that sometime down the line it could go wrong and you'll be out of my life. I have to keep you around Marissa – for my own sanity."

"But you do want things to change?" Marissa questioned her, holding her breath for the answer and trying desperately to hear clearly over her thumping heart in her ears as she watched the last shadows of her friend's stone-solid resolve crack and fall away. Bianca merely looked at her, tears sparkling at the corners of her eyes and Marissa didn't even try to stop herself from reaching up and wiping them away, leaving her hand to graze her cheek tenderly. "Please tell me that you want things to change Bianca. Please tell me that."

And this time Marissa really was pleading with her friend, her head shaking from side to side in her angst and Bianca coughed aloud, the sharp gasp causing her to lose all of her oxygen at once. "You… _you _want it to…?"

"Bianca I think I've been a blind fool," Marissa told her, realizing instantly that she was going to have to talk first. "I've been sitting here all night trying to figure out… this," she gestured emphatically between them as she scooted closer across the couch and brought their hands back together, their fingers reflexively entwining so tightly that their knuckles turned white against one another. "I've been sitting here looking at you and feeling like for the first time I've finally taken the veil off my head so that I can see you properly. It's literally like I've been walking around with it covering my eyes for months and I've only just now plucked up the courage to rip it off. I've blinded myself behind that veil Bianca – for some reason I just couldn't see it. But tonight…" she trailed off, rendered silent at the magnificence of the brunette's happy tears streaming down her face. She forced her hands to pull away from Bianca's so that she could cup her glowing face in them, sliding closer in the process until their noses were barely inches apart. "Tell me now Bianca," she whispered, the feeling of her warm breath across her cheek making Bianca tremble. "Tell me please."

"I… I need… I need you to let go of me Riss," Bianca managed to stammer breathlessly, her eyes fluttering wildly at the drunken intoxication of Marissa's hands on her face, the heat waves that blazed onto her cheeks shivering over her entire body like fever chills as she fought through the dense dreamy cloud in her brain. _If she doesn't back up then I'm not going to be able to do anything except sit here…_

But Marissa shook her head. "I'm not going to let go of you Bee. I'm right here and I don't want to let go."

It only took a quarter of a second for the redhead's words to sink into Bianca's consciousness, finally bursting inside her understanding with a swift kick to the wall she'd built up so high around her heart, sending it crashing into nonexistence as the feeling of Marissa's returned love flooded through the open gate and Bianca did the only thing she knew she had to do as words were obviously not going to cut it – she erased the final inches that stood between them and crashed their lips together with a delicate force that rocked them both to the core, all the air stolen from two sets of lungs as their love finally began its dance.


	4. The Way It Should Have Been

**I mean really guys with the reviews – you really know how to flatter a girl up right, and ensure that more chapters will appear a bit quicker…**

**But in other news, this chapter was fun for me. I spent a fair amount of time thinking about how exactly this would play out and very quickly settled on the following, my logic of course being that these two ladies would handle this situation as the purest thing that they are – as best friends. And what do best friends do when they're having trouble with something…? That'd be right – they **_**talk it out**_**. Or at least make a very valiant effort…**

**Also, to address some of the comments about this being my first fanfic – I truly appreciate your appreciation of my writing and would hope that it is at least somewhat apparent that I am in fact **_**not**_** a first time writer. And to **_**LoveDesired**_** – I owe you a big fat sloppy thank you for your overly generous feedback, and my only side comment is that it's not my day job that's keeping me from writing on the fanfiction.**

**K I'll be shutting up now. Continuing on…**

_**The Way It Should Have Been**_

There were very few moments in Bianca's life that she knew would be a catalyst for something magnificently wonderful before it was even over, but in that moment she had no clue what any of them were. Outside of ambiguously recognizing that kissing Marissa was going to make that short list, Bianca knew very little else.

She kept trying to make her mind question what was happening, expecting for there to be some roaring moment of clarity in which she would realize what she was doing and pull away, but that moment never came. All she could do was feel; feel while her mind went blissfully still, feel the blazing hot balloon that inflated inside her chest, feel Marissa's irresistibly soft lips pressing so fervently against her own. With one hand clutching the back of Marissa's neck and the other resting lightly on her waist Bianca could feel every movement the woman made and when their instantly passionate kiss deepened still further as the redhead closed the remaining distance between them until she was almost in her lap, Bianca's brain finally quit screaming so loudly at her and gave itself up to the feelings.

Marissa's hands wound around Bianca's neck and gently glided upward into her hair, sending a stinging tremor of chills all the way down her body until she felt the slight burn in her toes. She couldn't stop the low moan that escaped her at the sensation, the sound swallowed instantly by Marissa's hungry mouth and Bianca felt the lithe fingers in her hair tighten as the redhead pulled her closer still, after which Bianca stood no chance at all of thinking any rational thoughts so she simply allowed herself to become absorbed completely in the magic that was Marissa.

/

_I'm kissing Bianca. I'm kissing Bianca. I'm kissing Bianca_, Marissa thought over and over again in her mind, each time the words becoming a bit fuzzier as the raging intoxication of Bianca's insatiable lips took over her whole body. Bianca brought a hand up to her neck and gently tugged her closer which Marissa was happy to oblige in earnest, the combined feeling of a warm hand at the back of her neck and one resting on her hip sending a shock of burning chills coursing over her skin as well as a burst of fiery passion to erupt inside her chest.

She wound her fingers into Bianca's lush brown hair, the silky curls igniting another wave of prickly chills through her fingertips and down her arms, and when Bianca let out an almost imperceptible moan of pleasure it was all Marissa could do to keep from doing the same, instead covering the brunette's lips more solidly to silence them both. Her fingers reflexively tightened inside of Bianca's flowing hair as she pulled her closer, one last fragmented thought fluttering through her mind before dreamy euphoria took its place: _I'm not going to be the one to stop this._

/

It was many minutes later in fact that either woman made even the slightest move to pull away, by then both so impossibly breathless that it finally became necessary and the two sat back and gazed for a long moment into the other's eyes. A warm breeze played through the air and both women grinned slightly at the other's hair tickling her face, a comfortable giggle crossing between them when they both saw it. Bianca sat up slightly and Marissa rose with her, finally sitting upright after quite a few minutes of lying side by side together. Bianca reached up and stroked Marissa's cheek tenderly with the backs of her fingers, her heart flipping over at the redhead's contented sigh as she leaned forward until their foreheads rested gently against one another.

"So do you want to go first or should I?" Marissa asked softly, running her palm down the side of Bianca's neck and making her shudder at the feverish chill it caused.

"I think I need you to go first," she managed to stammer after a moment, and Marissa smiled tenderly.

"I fell in love with you Bianca," she told her evenly as she lifted her head to look at her, and the brunette's vision swam for a moment around Marissa's glistening hazel eyes locked so confidently on her own. "If I'm being honest with myself – which I think tonight I finally am – I have to admit that it probably started long before I was able to recognize it." She leaned in closer to Bianca's face as she spoke, slowly breathing in every ounce of her that she could until their lips were mere centimeters apart. "But it's there now – now I _have_ seen it and I can't go back. I don't want to go back." She nuzzled their noses together and closed the remaining distance, their already swollen lips coming together again as Marissa whispered the final words against Bianca's. "I want this – I want you and every single perfect thing about you." And then she could hold out no longer, the blazing desire to continue kissing the brunette overtaking her again as she pushed her down against the cushions and both women were lost once more to the passion of the other's embrace.

/

"Okay so now you go," Marissa told Bianca quietly quite a bit later. They sat upright on the couch again with their legs and arms tangled completely together. Marissa played absently with a silky strand of brown hair while Bianca gazed down at their interlocked fingers in her lap, the wide grin on her reddened lips making the redhead's heart flutter madly.

"I… I'm in a state of shock to be honest," Bianca admitted airily. "I can't seem to get it through my head that this is actually happening."

Marissa smiled brightly and tipped Bianca's chin upward. "This is really happening," she assured her before laying a reverent kiss on her lips, this time forcing herself to pull away before she lost the ability to. "At least – I really hope it is."

"Do you want it to?" Bianca asked reticently, only barely able to keep her thoughts intact as Marissa's lips left hers again. "I mean… you do realize what this will mean don't you?"

"Bianca I'm really not worried about losing our friendship here," Marissa told her. "In fact I'm almost positive that this will only make it stronger. You're like the other half of me or something – I can't imagine anything that could possibly make this – us – not work perfectly."

"And what about the fact that we're both women?" Bianca asked curiously, a little thrown that that wasn't what Marissa had referred to first. "Have you thought about how this could affect your life? Or AJ's? How people could start thinking about you and treating you differently…"

"Yes Bianca I have thought about how this will affect my life," Marissa cut her off with a sly grin. "And all I see is how incredibly happy I would be with my best friend by my side every single day, or how wonderful it would be for AJ to have your constant love and steadiness to help him grow into an amazing man, and to be able to grow up with Miranda and Gabby too. Those are the only things that really matter Bee – all the rest is just background noise and if I have you to help me deal with it then I know I'll be fine. We'll be fine, because I love you. That's all I need to…"

But Marissa never finished as Bianca grasped her firmly behind the neck and pulled her in, their lips colliding with such force that they both inhaled sharply. _It's going to take forever for us to talk this through at this rate,_ Marissa thought blandly, but then gladly allowed all other thoughts to disappear.

/

"Okay you go sit over there this time," Bianca said, indicating for Marissa to move to the armchair across the coffee table from the one she herself had just taken. "I can't handle being that close to you while trying to think clearly so until we talk this out I'm gonna sit here and you'll sit there. That way we won't keep getting interrupted."

"That sounds logical," Marissa agreed breathlessly as she slid from the sofa to the chair, crossing her legs in front of her and peering wryly at Bianca, who sat on her hands in the chair across from her. "Except I'm already irritated at the distance so start talking," she finished, her playful grin making the brunette's pulse quicken.

"Well first I need you to explain all of this to me," Bianca began, forcing a deep breath to keep her voice from shaking at the inferno of nerves that sprang up in her stomach again. "I mean this morning you were practically about to give JR another chance and now you're telling me that you've fallen in love with me after showing no signs of interest in that before…"

"Okay whoa," Marissa interjected. "First of all do you not remember why I'm here in the first place? This morning I was _not_ about to give JR another chance, I was still trying to catch him in one of his old tricks because I was still insanely suspicious of him. And then of course I did and now I'm here. And second of all, what do you mean I haven't shown any signs before now? After that whole nightmare with Ricky didn't you notice the shift in the way we acted around one another? Because I certainly did. All of the sudden I couldn't keep myself away from you, always running to your side if I could find you because I just needed to have you around. And then this morning in the hotel room when I found you there so upset – it just about shattered my heart to see you like that. And now I realize that it was such a huge mistake to walk out on you when I got the call about JR. I knew that there was something more that you wanted to tell me. In fact it even crossed my mind that maybe you _were_ struggling with whatever had changed between us but then you made it sound like you were just thinking about me and JR, but still I think I knew better. But I couldn't get you to react or open up and so I left. And I'm so sorry."

"Don't be sorry Riss," Bianca assured her. "This morning I was still trying to sort it out clearly too."

"So that wasn't what you wanted to tell me then? You really were just struggling with Ricky?"

"I thought I was, but as soon as you showed up I realized that I wasn't," Bianca confessed with a sheepish grin. "As soon as you got there and immediately started trying to help me and care about me I finally realized that I was displacing my terror of my feelings for you with Ricky's attack."

"Why was that so terrifying for you Bee?" Marissa asked, her breath hitching now. "You know you could have talked to me about anything."

"Marissa – as much as I love you, I've been down this road before," Bianca replied. "I've done the whole 'fall in love with your straight best friend' thing and I've even had that love returned. And every time I got my heart broken, it broke the hearts of my girls and I just couldn't do it again."

"Okay Bianca you're right," Marissa said, forcing down the massive petrified lump in her throat that Bianca would scare herself away from this as she compulsively slid off her chair and went to kneel in front of the now silently crying brunette. She gazed up into her spectacular brown eyes and caught her tears as they fell, mustering up everything she could think of to reassure her. "I get that you're scared, and I certainly understand why. But Bee I'm _begging_ you to look past the fact that I've always been straight because for me that's not even a factor. I told you a long time ago that I was in love with JR like I've never been in love before, but Bee – what I feel for you, what I _know_ we could be together, is so far beyond what I've ever felt in my whole life that I'm terrified of it too. But the _only_ thing I'm scared of is you not wanting to take this step with me. I'm not afraid of you hurting me because I know without question that you never will. All you'll ever do is love me so completely that I'll likely never compare, but I also know that there isn't anything that I want more than to try. I can't promise that I'm going to be a pro at it right away but I can promise that as long as you're there loving me through it that I'll be fine. _We'll_ be fine. And I _swear_ – I'll spend the rest of my life fixing the scars that those idiots left on your heart if you'll give me a chance."

"How can you be so sure?" Bianca asked, tears streaking from her eyes so quickly that Marissa could no longer stop them all.

"Because of this," Marissa replied evenly, reaching behind her to retrieve the music box from the table. She lifted the lid and wound the mechanism inside until the song began to play, holding it up in front of her chest as she stared in a stunned trance at its ornate porcelain design, losing herself instantly to the serenity of the music and Bianca's gorgeous face gazing back at her. "This was basically you're confession Bianca. Or at least it's what made everything become so incredibly clear to me. I probably would have gotten there on my own but this really proved how much you care about me. Because your love and thoughtfulness and compassion are written all over this, Bee. This is a gesture that has 'Bianca Montgomery' practically stamped on it and because I also know you so well I was really able to see it for what it is. That combined with the way I've been feeling toward you and the way I feel about you now makes this the easiest decision I've ever made in my life," she said as she too felt tears sting the corners of her eyes, laughing aloud giddily as a wide smile cut across her shining face. "But it wasn't really a choice Bianca – I fell in love with you so easily that I didn't even know it was happening."

Bianca could only beam elatedly in response, her voice lost in her throat to the simultaneous tears and giddy laughter that were forcing their way upward and Marissa sat up on the coffee table so that they were eye-level again, leaving the music box on the floor and scooping Bianca's hands into hers, they're eyes locked together as jubilant laughter began to replace their tears.

"Well as far as answers go I'd say that was a damn good one," Bianca said finally, sighing deeply at the unbridled joy she saw all over Marissa's exquisitely glowing face. "Now I only wish that I'd gotten up my courage sooner."

"Oh I don't know," Marissa replied impishly. "As far as love confessions go I'd say that this was kind of weirdly perfect." She leaned forward and placed her lips gently on Bianca's, waiting for her to respond. She felt Bianca's lips smile beneath hers and she smiled back, sharing a contended sigh.

"Marissa?" Bianca asked hoarsely.

"Hmm…?" was Marissa's dreamy reply.

"Can we talk more later?"

"Deal," Marissa said instantly, her hands flying upward to clasp Bianca's neck more firmly as their mouths roamed together. The two women stood and made their way clumsily back to the couch, neither one willing to pull away from the other, and as they stretched out again and their bodies molded so easily together they were each left with the same distracted thought –

_Finally._

/

Bianca awoke to the shrill call of a nearby bird and she sighed serenely as her eyes fluttered open, the wispy orange glow of the very early morning illuminating the backyard. She took a deep breath and sucked a strand of hair into her mouth, finally fully opening her eyes and seeing the shiny red streaks of the back of Marissa's head on the pillow right in front of her. She lifted her hand from Marissa's waist and pulled the hair out, accidently tugging on it and she felt the redhead jolt slightly.

Her head turned immediately toward Bianca's and she smiled sleepily, turning over easily so that they were facing one another. As she nuzzled her nose under Bianca's chin she said, "Good morning sunshine," which made the brunette chuckle.

"Sunshine?" she asked curiously, and Marissa's grin only widened.

"Yeah, the sunshine is glowing all over your face right now," she told her, placing a kiss at the end of her nose. "You look gorgeous in the light of a sunrise."

"You don't look so bad yourself," Bianca rasped, momentarily completely mesmerized that she had just woken up with Marissa in her arms. Memories of the previous night flashed across her mind until it swam; Marissa telling her so confidently that she was in love with her, finally being honest with Marissa herself about her own feelings, spending the rest of the night kissing and holding one another until they passed out in each other's arms. "We slept in our clothes," she said after a moment, to which Marissa glanced down at her rumpled red dress and Bianca's blue jeans.

"Eh…" she said, waving a hand casually before bringing it up to Bianca's cheek. "I had other things on my mind than finding a change of clothes," she grinned, leaning forward and claiming Bianca's lips with her own.

"Still you must be uncomfortable," Bianca said as she tried to sit up, but Marissa's arms immediately held tight to her waist and pulled her back down as she buried her face in Bianca's collarbone.

"No stay," she pleaded gently as she placed breathy kisses all along the brunette's supple skin and delighting in the waves of shivers she felt it create. "I'm perfectly comfortable right here."

Bianca only smiled elatedly and wrapped her arms tightly around Marissa's back, the two of them once again falling into a peaceful silence as they listened to the barrage of early morning songbirds.

"So umm – could I ask you kind of a geeky question?" Marissa asked after a while, finally lifting her head from Bianca's shoulder so she could gaze into her bright eyes. Bianca grinned and nodded, an eyebrow lifting in bemusement and Marissa couldn't help but giggle at the woman's innate charm. "Okay well – not to sound too much like a teenager at a school dance but… ahem… would you maybe want to be my girlfriend?"

Bianca's instant wide smile stretched up into her eyes and she beamed adoringly at the redhead, who laid there grinning so adorably at her question. "You really think you want me to be your girlfriend?"

Marissa squeezed Bianca closer to her and pressed their lips together, only pulling away when she felt it become more heated but she wanted to finish her thought. "I think that anyone who makes me want to make out all night like two preteens in a movie theater should be my girlfriend, yes," she replied teasingly, and Bianca laughed out loud.

"Oh well in _that_ case… I guess I'm going to have to say yes, aren't I?"

"I think that would be very wise," Marissa smiled gleefully before snuggling further into her arms. She laid her head against Bianca's chest and immediately heard her rhythmically thumping heart, the sound igniting a shockwave of emotions inside her own chest as she heaved a deep contented sigh. "I think this is the way it should have been," she breathed against Bianca's smooth skin, the ripple of chills it created coursing through them both.

"I second that," Bianca agreed softly, and the two women settled down into the tranquil morning together, all the joy in the world paling in comparison to their own.


	5. Real World: Pine Valley

**And once again I must first begin by thanking you all for your overly thoughtful and generous feedback. The best part of writing this now is that I know how much it is enjoyed by other Minxbians such as myself and so I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You're really too kind, honestly.**

**And I apologize for the delay but this story is far from over – while I said that the exaggerated drama on the actual show would be absent that certainly doesn't mean that my version will be drama-free. Drama does live in this world, though in much smaller doses than it does in Pine Valley, and our girls' blissful bubble of the first night will have to be popped eventually. The real world awaits…**

_**Real World: Pine Valley**_

"Do we really have to go back to the real world?" Marissa asked a few hours later. Both women had showered and changed, Bianca laying out a casual change of clothes for Marissa as she'd taken her turn in the bathroom, and as she descended the stairs into the living room and sighed happily at the sight of Bianca sitting on the couch waiting for her she caught a whiff of her perfume on the comfy t-shirt she wore.

Bianca smiled sideways at her as she sank down next to her. "I'm afraid so," she said regretfully, scooping the redhead into her arms as they reclined back together. "If not for the fact that I have to pick up the girls and we also need to go get AJ I might say otherwise, but as of today we're back on mom duty."

"And we also need to get my things out of the mansion," Marissa said, but she felt Bianca stiffen slightly behind her and she twisted around, meeting her suddenly concerned eyes. "What?"

"Riss are you sure you don't want to wait a few days for that?" she asked hesitantly. "I mean with everything that happened and…"

"No Bianca, I really don't want to wait," Marissa interrupted her, trying to convey that she was certain while also attempting to tame the intense anxiety that had taken hold of her stomach but it was really no use; she knew it wouldn't go away until her belongings were out of the mansion and JR was out of her life for good. "The longer I wait the worse it will be and I'm already dreading it enough. I just want to get it over with."

Bianca nodded. "I guess I understand but will you let me come with you? If we go now then we should have time before I have to pick up the girls later and I really don't want you facing JR alone."

Marissa's smile was answer enough, but she spoke up anyway. "I was actually just about to ask," she said, pecking Bianca's lips tenderly. "And besides your car's bigger. I'll need the space so I'm really just using you."

"Feel free," Bianca said, her playful grin matching Marissa's. "I also think I have some boxes that we could use too."

"See? _That's_ why I'm going to keep you around," Marissa smiled impishly at her girlfriend. "You're dead useful, and practical too."

"Ah – that's the only reason huh?" Bianca played along. "And here I was thinking that it was because of my mad needlepoint skills."

"Well that can be reason number two," Marissa told her as she leaned in again, but someone's key in the front door interrupted them and she impulsively pulled away, distancing herself from Bianca slightly as Caleb walked in the house.

"Ahem – morning Caleb," Bianca said forced casually as she exchanged a tense glance with Marissa. "How was your trip to New York? You're back a little early – I wasn't expecting you until this evening."

"Yeah the meetings wound down early so I caught an earlier flight," he said gruffly, crossing the living room behind the couch and barely glancing at the two women sitting on it. "I'm beat though so I'm going to have a quick nap. You ladies enjoy your day," he said as he climbed the stairs. As soon as he was out of sight Marissa scooted toward Bianca again and grasped her hands in hers.

"Oh god Bianca I'm so sorry," she said quickly, but the brunette only smiled warmly at her.

"It's okay Marissa, it caught us both off guard," she tried to reassure her, but Marissa shook her head.

"No I shouldn't have jumped away from you like that."

"You didn't jump away from me."

"Well I didn't stay where I was so…"

"So what?" Bianca questioned her. "I wasn't too hot on the idea of being caught by Caleb either so don't worry about it. Really Riss – it's okay." And just to bring it home she leaned forward and kissed the redhead gently.

"You're really amazing, you know that?" Marissa asked after a peaceful moment spent simply grinning sunnily at the woman in front of her, and the blush that colored her face only made Marissa's smile widen. "You're like the most understanding woman I've ever met."

"I'm really not trying to be understanding here Marissa," Bianca admitted quietly, her expression suddenly hesitant and Marissa squeezed her hands gently to urge her forward.

"What's wrong Bee?" she asked, trying to read the uncertainty in her face. "Tell me."

"Well – we haven't really talked about how we're going to handle this," Bianca replied with a slight shake of her head. "Us I mean."

Marissa nodded and thought about it. "Well I assume that I'll probably tell AJ first, and then probably Krystal. I'm not sure when would be the best time to tell JR but we can deal with that after I'm safely out of the mansion."

Bianca squinted at her as she spoke, almost in disbelief of what she was hearing. "You mean… you mean you're going to start telling people already? You're really ready for that?" she asked, her voice catching slightly as she tried to comprehend it. Marissa smiled crookedly at her and cupped her cheek in her hand tenderly.

"Yes Bianca, I'm ready for all of it," she told her confidently. "I mean yeah – I understand that some people will scoff or have something shitty to say but I really don't care about them. The only people that really matter will only want me to be happy, and I would hope that my immeasurable happiness will be very apparent to anyone who knows me at all. And don't you remember what I said last night? As long as I have you by my side then I know I'll be just fine." Bianca could only smile as she felt tears sting the corners of her eyes and Marissa leaned forward and stole a lingering kiss. When they pulled away Marissa rested her forehead against Bianca's. "Is that okay?" she asked, and the brunette chuckled.

"That's perfect," she replied with a watery smile, wiping the last tears from her cheeks. "I have a feeling that you're only going to keep surprising me."

"That's what will keep this relationship exciting," Marissa grinned slyly, and Bianca nodded.

"Oh yes, that among other things I'm sure," she agreed as she stood up. "So now how about getting this field trip to the Chandler mansion over with so we can get our kids and come back here for a movie and junk food night?"

"I think that's exactly what we'll need after today," Marissa replied, taking Bianca's hand as they walked to the door. _Our kids,_ she thought wildly as their fingers entwined and she allowed herself to be led to the car by her girlfriend. _She said 'our kids.'_

And the explosion of peaceful joy in her chest was indication enough that those words were exactly right.

/

"Are you ready for this?" Marissa asked as Bianca parked her car in front of the Chandler estate, sucking in a deep breath and holding it.

"Are _you_ ready for this?" Bianca repeated, gripping Marissa's hand comfortingly.

The redhead exhaled slowly. "I'm as ready as I'm going to be," she said after a moment. "Let's just get in there and get everything packed as quickly as we can so we can get the hell out again, sound good?"

"Sounds good," Bianca replied. "What are you going to tell AJ?"

"Well first I guess I need to figure out what JR's told him. Then I assume I'm going to have to talk to JR and make sure he doesn't have something else up his sleeve."

"Be prepared for anything," Bianca told her with a reassuring smile. "If I know JR then it would surprise me if he didn't have some kind of game plan already."

"That's the truth," Marissa agreed, taking another steadying breath. _Please god don't let that be the case…_

"How about this – I'll head straight upstairs and pack like a madwoman while you go find the boys and see what's going on," Bianca suggested, and the redhead nodded.

"That'll probably be best, even though the last thing I want to do is see or talk to JR right now. But we're back in the real world so I guess it's inevitable."

"Sorry babe, but I think you're right."

Marissa's blush as Bianca called her "babe" for the first time put a smile on her face despite her increasing tension and she leaned across the console and kissed her cheek tenderly. "Thank you for being here with me," she said softly, and the brunette smiled happily back.

"Of course," she replied. "Now count of three we just charge in there and get this shit done. One, two, three, go!" And she bolted from the car as Marissa did the same, the two women walking side by side up to the immaculate front doors of the mansion. But before they made it to the front stoop the door swung inward and AJ appeared.

"Mom!" he cried as he sprinted forward and collided with Marissa's stomach, wrapping his arms around her tightly without letting go. "I'm so happy you came back!"

"Of course I came back buddy," Marissa told him as she hugged him just as tightly back. After a moment she bent down and looked him in the eye, and the tense expression on his face worried her terribly. "I'll always come back for you, you know that right?" AJ nodded and threw his arms around her neck, burying his face in her shoulder and Marissa looked anxiously at Bianca. "What's wrong AJ?" she asked gently. "Did something happen?"

"Daddy was really mad when you left last night," he told her, his voice muffled inside of Marissa's red hair. "When I came downstairs and you were gone daddy was in the living room screaming into his cell phone and when I asked him what was wrong he just yelled at me to leave him alone so I ran back up to my room."

"Oh AJ I'm so sorry," Marissa told him comfortingly, stroking his shiny blonde hair tenderly. "I upset your dad last night so he really wasn't mad at you, but I'm sorry he took it out on you. Are you okay?"

AJ nodded against Marissa's neck but didn't reply, and Bianca couldn't keep herself from reaching out and rubbing his back soothingly. "It's okay buddy, grown-ups just lose their tempers sometimes," she told him reassuringly, and he finally pulled back and smiled weakly at her.

"What's going on out here?" came a deep voice from behind them and they all turned in unison to see JR standing in the open doorway. "See AJ? I told you mommy would be back."

AJ nodded again but didn't leave Marissa's side, and the redhead kept an arm firmly around his shoulder. "JR," she said in greeting, nodding tensely at him. He grinned crookedly back.

"Hey AJ why don't you run on upstairs and play some video games," he said airily. "Your mommy and I have some things to talk about."

"That sounds like fun," Bianca replied, smiling brightly down at the blonde haired boy. "Would you mind if I came up with you buddy?"

"Sure!" he said before peeling away from his mother and dashing back inside, and after a meaningful look back at the redhead Bianca followed him. JR stepped aside to let them through and then motioned for Marissa to come inside as well.

Marissa charged through the foyer and into the parlor, wasting no time before wheeling on JR as soon as he'd followed her inside. "What the hell did you do to AJ last night?" she bellowed, working very hard to keep her rising temper in check as she glared at the man who she now very nearly hated. "He acted like he's scared to death of you!"

"What are you talking about? AJ's fine," JR replied with a casual wave of his hand, that pretentious gold watch flashing across the room.

"Bullshit JR – AJ said you screamed at him to leave him alone right after I left yesterday, and from the way he was clinging to me I'd say that he's still scared," she practically snarled at him, her fiery anger rising as the timid look on AJ's beautiful face filled her mind. "What the hell did you do to him?"

"I didn't do anything to him Marissa, quit attacking me," JR responded as he sat down in one of the plush chairs beside them. He gestured for Marissa to take the seat across from him but she knew better than to sit down when she was so worked up. JR sighed heavily and continued. "I realized that I scared AJ as soon as he ran off so I went up and talked to him. He's fine now, honestly. I apologized."

"He doesn't seem fine JR," Marissa told him forcefully, refusing to believe the confident smile he'd plastered on his face. "What happened after I left last night?"

"Oh you mean after you ran out of our family outing?" JR questioned her, but Marissa was having none of it.

"We're not a family JR," she said. "Not anymore. And especially not after the stunt you pulled yesterday. I'm only here to get my things. Starting today we can go back to our joint custody arrangement because I certainly won't be living here anymore."

"Come on Marissa, you're not thinking clearly," JR replied with a sneer. "You know you're going to forgive me eventually because you know that I'm what you really want. Me and AJ and all three of us as a family again."

"Quit telling me how I fell you smug jackass," Marissa told him, only vaguely aware that name calling probably wouldn't help matters but unable to keep her raging ire in check as she glared into his overconfident eyes. "_You_ broke our family apart when you started sleeping around on me and you're lucky I've forgiven you as far as I have. But the three of us will never be a family again because I will never again want to be with you. Just looking at you now is making my skin crawl."

"Hey now – where's all this coming from?" JR asked her, spreading his arms wide in mock bewilderment. "You can't tell me that your attitude has changed that drastically just because of that little thing yesterday, and certainly not overnight. So what gives?"

"Okay first of all JR, you're the one who's been fooling yourself about us," she shot back at him. "You're the one who has refused to hear practically everything I've ever told you. And second of all while that stunt yesterday was relatively small in the grand scheme of things, it really only showed me once again that you're nothing but a conniving jerk who wants to get his way no matter the cost and that's not the kind of man I want in my life." _In fact I don't want any man in my life…_

"Marissa, come on," JR said, his voice low and pleading now, but once again Marissa saw right through his hurt act.

"No JR – I'm done," Marissa told him for the second time. "I'm going upstairs to pack my things and then I'm asking AJ if he wants to come with me tonight. And if he does I'm taking him and you can pick him up after school on Monday." She breezed out of the parlor and back into the foyer, and as she started up the steps she saw Bianca appear at the top.

"Uh Riss," she started, meeting the redhead halfway up the staircase. "We have a little problem…"

"What happened?"

"Well – I played a game with AJ because I didn't want him to get suspicious before you had a chance to talk to him but when I finally got away and went to your room to get your things the door was locked and I couldn't get in."

"Well did you try the study door?" she asked, and Bianca nodded.

"Both doors are locked Riss."

"Yeah we're having the west wing of the house redecorated and so all the suites have been sealed off until it's completed," JR said from behind them, and Marissa whirled around and fixed him with an evil glare as he stood there grinning smugly with his arms folded in front of his chest. "I guess you'll have to wait to collect your things until the renovations are through – I don't have the master key, sorry."

"Oh you are really a piece of work," Marissa seethed at him, descending a few steps but Bianca's hand on her shoulder made her stop and collect herself. "You have interesting timing."

"Well I've been putting it off for some time and since Scott is going to have Bruce's extra help I thought I'd just contract him to work on the mansion as well," JR replied smoothly, his white teeth glinting evilly at the two women on the stairs. "Hope there wasn't anything too important in there – the remodel could take a few months at the very least."

"You listen to me you manipulative scheming slimy sack of shit," Marissa said as she started forward and she was happy to know that Bianca was right behind her. "You can do whatever you want to me – you can steal my belongings…"

"I'm not _stealing_ anything," JR tried to cut in but Marissa pressed forward.

"You can scheme and plan and pull out all your best tricks but I hope you understand one thing," Marissa fumed quietly as she approached the still smirking JR. "You will _never_ break me. You will never again merit _any_ respect from me at all and the only dealing I'll have with you is to talk about raising our son. And if you keep up your little games I'm not sure what kind of father I think you're turning out to be. This is not the kind of behavior I want modeled for AJ so you better think long and hard about how far you're willing to fuck with me because trust me – you have _no idea_ who you're really dealing with. So just keep that in mind the next time you turn back to your tricks because I've got plenty of my own and I'm willing to play. I'm willing to play to protect myself and my son."

"Are you threatening me?" JR asked her, his voice eerily quiet as he squinted at the redhead who matched his gaze with an equal amount of malice.

"You bet your sorry ass I am," she replied evenly, now nearly nose to nose with the man. "I don't want this to get ugly JR but you've already started it, so either back down or get ready. The choice is yours."

JR merely raised his eyebrows and widened his smirk. "Don't have the master key, sorry."

Marissa took a deep, steadying breath and turned away. "AJ!" she called, bounding halfway up the stairs. Her son appeared immediately and she climbed up to him. "You want to come spend the rest of the weekend with me?" she asked, proud of herself that she was able to drop any hint of her simmering fury as she addressed her innocent son and he smiled broadly in reply. "I'm staying at Bianca's and we can have a slumber party with Miranda and Gabby."

"Yeah!" AJ exclaimed, immediately turning around and bolting back to his room to get his things. Marissa turned slowly around and descended the steps again, locking gazes with Bianca for a second and she felt some of the tension drain from her chest at her comforting reassurance. As she reached the bottom landing she turned once again toward JR, who hadn't moved from his place in front of the parlor doors but his face had tightened when AJ disappeared.

"I'll drop him at school on Monday and you can pick him up after," Marissa told him pointedly as she strolled to the front door. "And be sure and let me know when your 'remodel' is finished so I can I have my things picked up."

AJ reappeared and dashed down the stairs to his mother's side, throwing a slightly nervous glance at his father as he stopped in the doorway. "Bye daddy," he said timidly, clinging tighter to Marissa's hand at his furious expression but after a moment the man's face finally softened slightly as he addressed his son.

"Have fun AJ," he told him, but his attempt at fooling the boy didn't work nearly as well as Marissa's had. "I'll see you on Monday afternoon okay?"

"Okay," AJ replied as he spun around and sprinted toward Bianca's car. The two women merely shook their heads disgustedly at JR as they too turned away, and by the time they had joined AJ at the car JR had disappeared behind the Chandler mansion's closed front doors.


	6. A Child's Watchful Eye

**Okay is it just me or is some of this couple's inherent charm due partly to the three undeniably **_**adorable**_** children they share? Probably not just me, so I've decided to play up on that a little and give the girls a lovely evening away from the bullshit that Dipshit just dropped on them. I'm quite certain that in spite of everything these women would manage to turn a rotten beginning to the day into something fun and possibly a little magical, with the help of their three **_**adorable**_** children of course, who as far as I'm concerned kind of got brushed under the rug where it came to character development so I've decided to attempt to remedy that. I always wanted to see more of them and so this chapter is just for them really.**

**Onward again.**

_**A Child's Watchful Eye**_

"Mommy are we moving out of daddy's house?" AJ asked as soon as Bianca pulled the car out of the Chandler's extensive driveway, his green eyes fixed heavily on his folded hands in his lap and the sadness in the little boy's voice nearly shattered Marissa's heart.

"I am sweetie," she told him gently, twisting around in her seat so that she could look at her son. She placed a hand on his knee and he brought his gaze up to meet hers, Marissa doing her best to paint on a reassuring smile. "We're gonna go back to how it used to be, do you remember? Sometimes you'll live with daddy and sometimes you'll live with me, but no matter what we'll both love you just as much. We just won't be together like we used to be."

"Because daddy's so mad?" AJ asked innocently, and Marissa sighed heavily.

"Daddy's only mad right now AJ, but he'll be better soon," she promised him with as much assurance as she could muster. "We just had a little disagreement and that's why he's upset but he's not angry with you. Sometimes grown-ups just don't agree and they let their anger get the best of them, but I promise that it's nothing for you to worry about." AJ took a deep breath and stared out the window for a moment, Marissa exchanging a worried glance with Bianca who could only offer her a half-hearted smile. "Are you okay buddy?" she asked hesitantly, unsure if she was ready for the answer but the pensive look on his face was difficult to read.

"Yeah," he began, finally pulling his gaze from the passing cars to look at his mother again. "I just hoped that you would be happy after you moved back in with us, but I think maybe you're right – you're not as happy as I want you to be so if moving out again will help then I guess I'm okay. I don't want daddy's yelling to make you scared either."

"I'm not scared of your dad AJ," Marissa told him firmly while trying desperately to fight the tears that had swelled up in her eyes at the little boy's heartfelt words. "And there's no reason for you to be scared of him either. Your daddy loves you more than anything in this world. He just got upset and reacted badly but that doesn't change how he feels about you."

"I know," AJ sighed heavily, "but he's started yelling more than usual and I don't know why. I just want you both to be happy again."

"I am happy," Marissa replied with her brightest smile. "I'm happy because I've got the best kid in the whole world and a little yelling will never change that."

AJ smiled broadly in return, giggling slightly as Marissa tousled his shaggy blonde hair. "I'm glad you're happy mommy."

"I'm very happy AJ," she told him again, her heart cracking inside her chest at her son's innocent green eyes sparkling back at her. "And we're gonna have the best weekend ever with Bianca and the girls, okay? How would you like to go back to Wildwind and spend all night watching movies and eating junk food?"

"Can I stay up as late as I want?" AJ asked enthusiastically, the last wisps of sadness draining instantly from his face.

"You bet!"

"I was thinking that maybe a fort would be fun too," Bianca interjected, and AJ's mouth dropped open in excitement and the brunette laughed out loud. "I think that with the five of us all working together we could build the best fort that ever existed, right AJ?"

"Right!" the boy exclaimed, pumping his fist in the air as Marissa reached across the console and took her hand. Bianca looked over and met her eyes and the two women smiled happily at one another.

"Thank you," Marissa mouthed, and Bianca merely nodded slightly as AJ began offering ideas for the best way to go about their fort-building.

/

"Okay guys, everybody run upstairs and change into some comfy clothes," Bianca directed the three children as they all piled into Wildwind a few hours later. After retrieving both girls the five of them had gone to lunch together, the entire meal filled with endless planning on the epic fort they planned to build as soon as they got home and the kids could barely contain their excitement as they bolted past Bianca and Marissa and made a beeline for the staircase. "AJ you can drop your things in Miranda's room and after you've changed go around the house and get all the stuff we'll need for the fort and meet us in the playroom," Bianca finished hurriedly, three pairs of tiny feet already gone from sight. She chuckled and turned back to Marissa, immediately grabbing her hands and pulling her in.

"Okay, the coast is clear," she told her quietly, squeezing her tightly and she felt the redhead slump inside her arms. "Let 'er rip."

"You know I really don't think I need to," Marissa said softly against her shoulder, her hands instinctively gripping the small of Bianca's back as she pressed herself more firmly against her. "I knew JR would have a game plan before I ever went back there so I really knew what I was getting myself into. And you know what? His little stunt actually makes me feel better in a twisted sort of way."

Bianca raised an eyebrow in bemusement as the pair pulled back to look at one another. "Oh?"

"Yep. The fact that he already had that room locked makes me think that he knew that he wasn't going to get me back this time so he didn't care about pissing me off," Marissa explained. "He just of course wanted to have the final say and he got it. But I don't care because it's over and I think he knows it. So I feel better."

"Twisted indeed," Bianca replied with a grin, her own tension finally dissipating at the relaxed expression on her girlfriend's face. "But you know it's still not really over right?"

"Oh yeah I get that," Marissa said, leaning forward to rest her head on the brunette's shoulder again and she took a deep breath of her lusciously scented hair. "I'll have to go back and deal with him – figure out some way to get my stuff. I may have to recruit Scott to bust down the door."

"Well as long as you have someone there," Bianca told her. "I know you said you're not scared of him but I don't trust JR Chandler's anger not to surprise us. It's not like that hasn't happened before."

Marissa pulled back and gazed intently into chocolate eyes. "I'll be careful, I promise," she assured her, running a finger delicately along her jawline as she couldn't help but smile broadly despite the tone of the conversation.

Bianca shook her head. "What?" she asked, a little confused by the abrupt bright smile that lit the redhead's face.

Marissa's smile only grew wider as she leaned forward and pecked Bianca's lips gently. "You want to know why I'm really okay?" she asked softly, and Bianca nodded as she cocked an eyebrow and Marissa ignored the little jump in her stomach at her girlfriend's innate charm. "Because of you," she told her, seizing her mouth again for another lingering kiss which she only pulled away from so that she could continue explaining. "Twenty-four hours ago I was sitting on that couch completely wrapped up in JR's bullshit and the thing that pulled me out of it was you. And having you there with me today, being able to get away from it by spending time with you and the kids – it makes it tolerable. And now the only thing I can't seem to figure out is why it took me so damn long to see what was clearly right in front of my face."

"Hmm… and what exactly is that?" Bianca asked playfully, and Marissa delighted in her uninhibited joy.

"Well…" she began slowly, momentarily unsure of what exactly her answer should be but she made up her mind to simply tell the woman in her arms the truth instead of playing along. "That you're all I really need to feel safe and secure," she continued, noticing the serious dip in Bianca's gorgeous eyes as she spoke. "That when I'm with you everything else just disappears because when you're around all I can feel is deliriously happy. You make me feel seen and understood and appreciated and I feel like an idiot that it took me so long to see it because it's all completely clear to me now. We belong together – and I'm absolutely positive of that."

"You're no idiot Riss," Bianca told her, her voice catching in her throat as the crashing realization that she was holding Marissa in her arms washed over her again. "I can understand that falling for your best friend who also happens to be a woman must have been a little confusing for you so cut yourself a break."

Marissa shook her head. "How do you keep doing that?"

"What?"

Marissa sighed at Bianca's continued innocence. "Make everything seem like it's just perfectly okay with you. Your level of understanding is astounding."

Bianca grinned slyly and leaned forward for a quick kiss. "I'm faking most of the time," she said, but Marissa shook her head again.

"Uh – I call bullshit on that," she told her. "And you also have the tendency to never give yourself enough credit. I plan on helping you with that."

"Oh do you now?"

"Absolutely," Marissa grinned as she kissed the brunette again before trailing a line of soft kisses across her cheek. "It's just one of the many plans I have for you," she whispered, her voice dropping an octave which caused Bianca's stomach to crash instantly down into her toes.

"Plans?" she managed to stutter, her eyes fluttering madly at the wild intoxication of Marissa's warm lips against her face. She felt them smile against her ear and she shuddered.

"Yes – I have a feeling when it comes to you I will be utterly incapable of not making plans," she said sensually just loud enough for her girlfriend to hear, her hands running slowly up the subtle arch of Bianca's back as the brunette cleared her throat.

"Ahem – what exactly did you have in mind?"

Marissa grinned and chuckled quietly, nuzzling her nose into the crook of Bianca's neck. "Well as of right now my plan is for us to go upstairs and build a badass fort with our kids. After that I guess you'll have to wait to find out." She pulled away abruptly and skipped across the room, careful to add a flirtatious swagger to her hips as she sauntered toward the stairs. She threw a tantalizing look over her shoulder and winked at the woman who stood completely frozen in the middle of the room, her mouth hanging open slightly with her hands still held up in midair where they had just seconds before been holding the redhead.

"Oh you are such a tease," Bianca croaked as she regained her composure, finally moving to follow her across the room and Marissa grinned mischievously and grasped her hand, leading them up the staircase toward the sound of children's laughter.

But as Bianca followed her, their fingers entwining easily behind Marissa's back, she had two very vivid thoughts on her mind.

_Okay – opt to ignore the fact that the back of your hand is bouncing against Marissa's butt;_

And _Our kids. Marissa said _our_ kids._

/

"Well guys, I'd say we definitely pulled it off," Marissa stated triumphantly as she stepped back to admire the enormous fort they'd just assembled, blowing a flyaway strand of hair from her nose. "Just three hours later and there she is – it's beautiful."

"It's awesome!" Miranda exclaimed as she crawled through the entrance, the bottom of a sheet catching around her forehead as she grinned happily up at Marissa and her mother and both women chuckled at her unbearable cuteness.

Bianca reached down and grasped her daughter's hand and helped to pull her to her feet, smoothing down her static infested hair. "I'd definitely call this awesome Mimo – and your idea of making it two separate rooms worked really well. Great idea."

"Thanks mom!"

"Where'd your sister get off to though?" Bianca asked, recalling seeing the little girl curled up in some of the extra pillows about half an hour before.

"Oh she passed out while you two and AJ were putting the finishing touches on the ceiling so I tucked her into the couch in the playroom for a nap," Marissa told her, gesturing toward the cracked door adjoining the TV room where they'd built the fort to the playroom. "I think she was exhausted after spending the night out last night."

"She was," Bianca agreed, unable to hide her goofy grin as she imagined Marissa carrying her sleeping daughter and she felt her heart flutter madly as the redhead winked at her again.

"Where's AJ?" Marissa asked after a moment.

"I'm in here!" came his muffled voice from inside the fort, his shadow barely visible through the hanging sheets. "I'm trying to get the TV set up so none of the sheets or pillows are in the way."

"I'll help!" Miranda called happily as she dived back inside, and as soon as her feet disappeared Bianca reached out and pulled Marissa to her for a tight hug.

"What's this?" Marissa whispered as Bianca buried her face inside flowing red hair.

"Nothing, I just wanted to hold you for a minute," Bianca told her honestly, her mind filling with memories of the previous three hours as she'd watched her daughters giggle endlessly with both Marissa and AJ, her heart barely able to contain her happiness. "My girls love you."

"And I love your girls," Marissa replied, scooping Bianca's face into her hands so that she could look at her. "I love them like they're my own."

Bianca couldn't even think of a reply as she swallowed the giant apple in her throat; Marissa had said those words plenty of times before but there was something different about the intent this time, as she now carried the dual title of "best friend" and "girlfriend." Marissa of course understood this as well and smiled assuredly at her. They stood there for a long moment merely smiling happily at one another and listening to the sounds of their children bantering back and forth about how it would be best to set up the pallet where they would sleep, but soon the two seven-year-olds bounced outside again and both women reluctantly pulled away.

"I want a hug too!" AJ cried as he untangled himself from a loose sheet, but instead of running to his mother he collided gently with Bianca's torso and squeezed her hard. Bianca instinctively wrapped her arms around the boy's back and held him just as tightly in return, her stunned expression mirrored by her girlfriend as Miranda crashed cheerfully into her side. Marissa's arms reached down and scooped the girl into a tight hug.

"Thanks Marissa," Miranda twittered. "I'm really glad that you and AJ are staying with us this weekend."

"Me too," Marissa agreed somewhat breathlessly, relishing the surge of delight at the young girl's arms wrapped so eagerly around her hips and her eyes found Bianca's again, who appeared to be collecting herself as well as she rubbed AJ's back.

"Thanks for letting us build a fort Bianca," he told her with a wide grin. "You and mom really are the coolest moms ever."

"You think so?" Bianca asked elatedly. "Well we happen to think that you and Miranda and Gabby are the coolest kids ever."

"Then we're just the coolest family ever!" Miranda shouted as she peeled away from Marissa and darted toward her mother, gripping her hand as she tugged her toward the hall. "Come on mommy – let's go get the snacks so we can all get in the fort and watch movies like you promised!"

Bianca managed a stunned glance over her shoulder at Marissa as the girl led her eagerly away, both women's eyes now shining with suppressed tears. _Did she really just call us a family?_

As Bianca and Miranda disappeared around the corner AJ crossed to his mother and wrapped his arms around her. "You seem really happy mommy," he said, and Marissa's heart nearly gave out on her.

"I am so so so so happy AJ," she told him as she kissed the top of his head, still completely taken aback at his apparent intent on making sure she was happy. "Are you happy AJ?"

"I'm really really happy," he replied as he pulled away. "I love getting to spend time with Miranda and building this fort was so much fun! I can't wait to use it tonight."

"You really love Miranda don't you buddy?" Marissa asked him, sensing that this may be the perfect time to approach talking to AJ about everything.

AJ nodded. "She's my birthday twin," he stated with a smile, the gap in his front teeth making him look so beautifully innocent. "And Gabby too – Gabby's a lot of fun when she's not asleep."

Marissa giggled and led her son over to the only chair they hadn't used in building the fort and sat down, pulling the boy onto her lap. "Yeah they're all a lot of fun, huh? Miranda and Gabby and Bianca too."

"I love Bianca," AJ agreed. "She's always been really nice to me and Miranda always talks about how cool she is. And you like Bianca too don't you?"

"I love Bianca too," Marissa replied. "And Miranda and Gabby of course. I love them all."

"Are you going to live here with them now?" he asked, and the question made Marissa reel a little but she managed to push forward.

"Yeah I think so, at least for a little while," she said. _Oh my god – we haven't actually talked about it. But Bianca and I _just_ got together so would that seem too much like us moving in together right away? I told AJ that we were staying here but I never actually asked Bianca about it… what if she thinks I'm forcing myself on her? And we haven't even slept together yet so did that seem like I was being extremely presumptuous? What if I'm imposing too much on Caleb by expecting to be able to crash here until I find something else? What happens if…_

"Mommy?" AJ's soft voice cut in to her frenzied thoughts and Marissa's attention snapped back to him. "Are you okay? You look worried."

"No buddy, I'm not worried," she told him evenly, forcing a sincere smile which the boy returned. "I'm incredibly happy, remember?"

"I remember," AJ grinned, resting his head gently on her shoulder and he sighed deeply. "Are you happy because of Bianca?"

If his question about her moving into Wildwind had caught her by surprise that was nothing to the shock of his latest inquiry, but Marissa felt her head nod impulsively against her son's shiny blonde hair. "Yes AJ – I'm happy because of Bianca."

"I thought so," he told her quietly as his fingers played with the dangling strings of his hoodie. "You both seemed extra happy today and you were hugging a lot."

Marissa couldn't help but laugh. "I guess we weren't all that subtle huh?"

"Not really, but it's okay," AJ shrugged. "So does that mean that you're going to be a couple now?"

Marissa could only blink repeatedly as she gazed down at the top of her son's head, his incredible perception shocking her once again. _Damn this kid doesn't miss anything,_ she thought wildly. "I… we're… yeah buddy we are. Bianca and I are a couple now."

"Like you and daddy used to be a couple?"

"Yeah – like me and daddy used to be."

"So… does that mean that Miranda and Gabby are like my sisters now?" he asked slowly, but Marissa noticed that his hands had dropped the strings they'd been absently playing with and she tried very hard not to let it terrify her.

"Well," she began hesitantly, but quickly realized that that was likely exactly what would end up happening. "Yeah I guess in a way they are. I mean not _really_ right now but hopefully one day soon they will be for real."

AJ's head shot upward and he jumped gleefully from Marissa's knee, whirling around and flashing his sparkling eyes back at his mother. "That's awesome!" he bellowed, pumping his fist in the air as he whooped happily again. "I've always wanted a sister and it's even more perfect that it's my birthday twin! This is great!"

Marissa sat back and watched her son dive back into the entrance of the fort, her mind reeling from his completely unexpected reaction to the news. _That – that went better than I ever dreamed it would,_ she thought, utterly amazed at both AJ's insightfulness as well as his evident open-mindedness to the idea of his mother being a couple with another woman, a fact which he'd basically completely forgotten to mention and Marissa wondered briefly if she shouldn't pull him back and try to explain but AJ's blonde head soon stuck out of a hole in the side of the fort.

"So wait – does this also mean that I have two mommies now?" he asked, and Marissa crossed the room and knelt down beside him.

"Well – would you be happy if Bianca was your mommy?" she asked hesitantly, but AJ only briefly considered the question before responding.

"Yeah!" he said, the sudden jerk of his head threatening to tug one of the sheets down and Marissa's hand shot upward to steady the swaying side of the fort as AJ giggled. "Oops. But I think that would be kind of awesome – one daddy, two mommies, and two sisters. That sounds like a pretty cool family to me."

"Me too AJ," Marissa managed to choke as tears stung her eyes, the torrent of affection for the brightly grinning boy causing her to momentarily lose her voice.

"Do I still call her Bianca though?" AJ asked as his head disappeared through the small gap again.

"You can call her whatever you want to," Marissa replied, happy to have the opportunity to wipe her tears away without AJ seeing.

"I think I'll probably still call her Bianca for a while," AJ's muffled voice called to her, and Marissa suddenly wondered what he was doing inside the tent as she saw the shadowy outlines of pillows go flying across the floor.

"What are you doing in there buddy?" she asked, but it was a few seconds before he responded.

"You'll see when Bianca and Miranda get back and we all get in," he said and his head reappeared at the hole, startling Marissa slightly but AJ merely leaned out and gave his mother a quick peck on the cheek. "You're not allowed in here until they get back, okay?"

"Okay," Marissa agreed as she stood up again. She sank back down in the chair and watched her son's outline inside the fort, relief mixed with overpowering elation washing over her body and she felt her shoulders relax.

_Of course it was going to be that easy,_ she thought. _Everything about this is just so blissfully easy._

/

"AJ said that Marissa's going to stay here with us for a while," Miranda told Bianca pointedly as she loaded a bag of popcorn into the microwave and she spun around to face her daughter who had climbed up onto a barstool and sat peering across the island counter at her with her chin resting on her hands. "Is that really true?"

"Well I hope that she is," Bianca replied in what she hoped was a tone that appeared casual while bracing herself for the onslaught of questions she knew were boiling behind Miranda's beautifully glowing eyes. "We haven't really talked about it but yeah – I think she'll be here at least for a little while since she decided to move out of the Chandler's house."

"Yeah, AJ was kind of bummed that his parents aren't getting back together," Miranda told her, and Bianca only barely managed to swallow the lump in her throat. "But Marissa seems a lot happier now so I think AJ's happy now too."

"Did he tell you that?" Bianca asked, trying to feel her daughter out of the information she'd collected over the course of the day.

Miranda nodded. "Yeah – he said he was hoping for his parents to get back together but it kind of seems like now that they're happier apart. At least Marissa seems to be and so AJ said he was happy for her."

"Well I hope that Marissa is happy now," Bianca replied as she turned back to the cabinet to retrieve a bowl for the popcorn but she felt Miranda's heavy gaze on her back and she twisted around again. "What?"

"Well… I was just kind of curious… I mean I kind of started to wonder if maybe…" Miranda's voice trailed off as she dropped her eyes to her hands, and Bianca walked over and leaned across the counter so they were eye level.

"You were wondering what Mimo?" she asked gently.

Miranda took a deep breath and brought her eyes up to peer into her mother's. "Well… I mean you and Marissa are such good friends and everything… and you both seem to be extra happy today because we're all here together and you kept hugging all the time while we were building the fort… and I like Marissa and AJ so so much and love it when they're around and so I was just kind of wondering if maybe you and Marissa could be a couple and then you could both be this happy all the time."

Bianca's knees nearly gave out on her at the astounding comprehension of Miranda's words, her voice becoming lost somewhere at the back of her throat as she blinked furiously at the beautifully innocent little girl in front of her._ Did she really just suggest that? Did she figure it out already and so she's asking because she wants me to tell her? That really wouldn't surprise me… she's so damned perceptive and so I can't hardly be surprised by it. Or is she genuinely asking…?_ "You… you want Marissa and I to be a couple?"

Miranda nodded shyly and shrugged her tiny shoulders, her braided plaits sliding around and tumbling down her back. "You've been really sad since mommy Reese left us and Marissa's been the only one who makes you smile like she used to," she told her quietly as her eyes darted nervously around the kitchen. "She makes you smile bigger actually and so I was just wondering even though Marissa doesn't love other women like you do. But you always say that love doesn't see gender so I thought maybe Marissa would know that too since you guys are always so happy when you're together. Plus it would be really awesome to have her as a mommy and AJ as my brother – they both kind of already are anyway."

Tears started pouring from Bianca's eyes halfway through Miranda's speech with her helpless to stop them and she pushed herself back from the counter and crossed to her daughter on the stool, wrapping her snugly in her arms as she finished speaking. "You are the most wonderful little girl in the whole world," she told her fondly as she kissed the top of her head, her heart swelling so much that her chest actually ached slightly as Miranda's tiny hands grasped across her back and held her tight. "I love you so much that I can't even tell you how much I love you."

"You don't have to cry mommy," Miranda said against her shoulder, but Bianca felt her arms squeeze her closer in comfort. "I really just want you to be as happy as you used to be, or stay as happy as you are today. I like it when you're happy."

Bianca laughed aloud as more tears erupted from her eyes and streaked down her face into Miranda's glossy brown hair and after a moment she reached up and wiped some of them away as she pulled back to look at her daughter. "You are incredibly thoughtful Mimo," she rasped as a tiny delicate finger reached up and swept away more of her tears, the action only causing more to spring forward and Bianca started laughing again at her emotional absurdity. "Well I have some very good news for you then sweetie," she said as she stepped back. "While you are just immeasurably thoughtful you are also quite perceptive. Marissa and I are already a couple."

"You are?" Miranda asked, the tentative excitement in her voice bursting through.

"We are," Bianca replied with a nod, and the young girl jumped from the stool and ran back into her mother's arms, the force of her colliding with her stomach momentarily winding Bianca slightly but she didn't care; she bent down and scooped her daughter under the arms and lifted her up, the two spinning around in ecstatic circles as they both giggled uncontrollably.

"I'm so happy mommy!" Miranda exclaimed, her arms squeezing Bianca's neck so tightly that she was starting to get a little dizzy but she didn't care, instead just ceasing their spinning as she clung more firmly to her daughter. "This is going to be so great!"

"It is going to be great," Bianca agreed dazedly as Miranda finally pulled back and beamed at her. "I'm so glad that you think so too."

"How can I not? I _love_ Marissa! She's so much fun and she's AJ's mom which only makes her that much cooler! And she makes you happy and you make her happy and so then everybody's happy!" she cried as she jumped down again, immediately bolting back toward the kitchen staircase. "Come on let's go celebrate with them!" she called as she disappeared around the corner, and Bianca could do nothing but follow her in a silent trance.

"Marissa!" she heard Miranda cry and she thought momentarily of quieting her daughter for the sake of her other sleeping child but thought better of it; at that point she wanted nothing more than to wake her up and hug her tightly from the explosion of euphoria in her heart. "Marissa! AJ! Mommy says that you're a couple now and we're all going to be a family!"

"I know mommy just told me!" Bianca heard AJ reply as she rounded the doorframe into the TV room, AJ's blonde head sticking out of a small hole in the side of the fort as Miranda literally launched herself onto Marissa's lap on the other side of the room. Marissa caught her easily and the two fell back against the cushion with their arms wrapped firmly around one another and as Bianca watched this unfold she missed AJ reemerging from the fort as he sprinted toward her, once again being knocked breathless as the boy slammed into her stomach, the force of the blow knocking them both over and AJ toppled down on top of her as she enveloped him in her arms.

"This is gonna be so awesome!" AJ cried as he got swiftly to his feet, Miranda leaving Marissa's lap and meeting him in the middle of the room where they exchanged a quick hug and a loud high five. "We're gonna get to spend so much more time together now! It's gonna be like a never-ending sleepover!"

"I know it rocks!" Miranda agreed, the two of them turning in unison as they reentered the fort, nearly tearing the doorway down in their excitement.

Bianca rushed immediately over to Marissa who was rising from the chair, her hair tousled slightly from being pressed against the cushion. They collided with the same force as Bianca had been hit from AJ, the two staggering slightly as they clung to each other so tightly that they could hardly breathe.

"You told him?" Bianca managed to ask through simultaneous tears and explosive laughter, and Marissa nodded vigorously against her cheek.

"He's thrilled – obviously," she replied, her hands reaching up to pull Bianca's face to hers, their kiss filled with so much joy and relief that they could hardly comprehend it. When Marissa finally pulled away she asked "And Miranda? You obviously filled her in as well?"

"Miranda actually suggested you and I coupling up about two minutes after we got to the kitchen," Bianca told her, to which Marissa burst out in another fit of elated laughter.

"You're kidding?"

Bianca shook her head. "Not at all – she's one hell of a bright little girl."

"I'll say…" Marissa agreed, but her attention was caught by the adjoining door to the playroom creaking slowly inward as Gabby appeared rubbing her eyes.

"Mommy?" she asked softly, blinking into the bright light of the room and Bianca walked over and scooped her into her arms. "What's goin' on?"

Bianca looked a question at Marissa without really needing to, the redhead immediately answering with a piercing smile and swift nod. "Well baby, we're celebrating," she told her gently as the girl rested her head tiredly on her shoulder.

"What awe we celebwating?"

"We're celebrating because Marissa and I are going to be together now, and AJ and Mimo just found out and are really excited," Bianca replied, instinctively clutching the tiny child as close as she could.

Gabby blinked rapidly for a few seconds before lifting her head, tilting it slightly to the side as she peered intently at Marissa only about a foot away. "Mawissa?" she asked, and the redhead's heart exploded at the sound of her name coming from the beautiful little girl.

"Yes baby – Marissa and I are together," Bianca went on. "It really just means that we love each other and she's going to be around a lot more now, okay?"

"Okay," Gabby smiled as she leaned out of her mother's arms toward Marissa, who willingly reached forward and allowed the little girl to wrap herself around her body as her head fell drowsily against her shoulder. "I love Mawissa so I wanna celebwate too."

"Let's all go celebrate," Bianca managed to say through another swell of tears at the sight of her youngest daughter in her love's arms, the look on both of their faces melting her heart completely. Gabby wiggled free and Marissa set her gently on the ground where she toddled over to the entrance to the fort, AJ holding it open for her and soon all three kids disappeared inside again.

Bianca walked over and wrapped her arms around Marissa's waist from behind, resting her chin on her shoulder as the two watched their kids' shadows dance around inside the fort, their loud laughter drifting out to them and both women sighed contentedly.

"This is incredible," Marissa whispered as Bianca kissed her cheek tenderly, feeling her happy tears combine with her own as they tumbled down her face.

"This is perfect actually," Bianca said into her ear, and Marissa closed her eyes and leaned back into her girlfriend, trying her best to soak up every single thing about the moment; their children's elated giggles and conversation, the warmth in her chest at the boundless love that circled around the room, Bianca's firm hands on her stomach, squeezing her tightly against her as her lips kissed her cheek again and again; Marissa could have stayed in that moment forever and never thought twice about it, all the family she'd ever dreamed of suddenly right there in that room with her.

_Finally._


	7. Our Thoughtful Children

**K guys – this chapter is nothing like I originally planned but I found myself jonesing for a little peaceful alone time for our girls, mainly because there are still some things that I believe it would be important for them to discuss. So in many ways this is really a fluff chapter as I can't seem to get enough of seeing the one-on-one interaction between these two, in high-definition detail no less.**

**Aaaaaand your reviews have tattooed my blush on. Really really – you're too nice to me.**

**Anyway, hope you enjoy reading the fluff as much as I enjoyed writing it.**

_**Our Thoughtful Children**_

It was after midnight that night before any of the kids finally started coming down from their intense sugar-high, supplied by the copious amounts of candy and soda that their mothers willingly let them indulge in. By the time the third movie finished just after 12:30 all three kids had passed out completely, Miranda and AJ sprawled side-by-side on the pallet right in front of the TV while Gabby snored gently with her head on her mother's lap and her legs draped over Marissa's knees. Marissa eased the girl's legs off her and crawled over the other two to turn off the TV while Bianca gently lifted the toddler and scooted her over on top of some large pillows where she immediately curled into a tight ball and went on sleeping.

"My legs are completely numb," Bianca whispered with a grin at Marissa as she massaged the tops of her thighs where Gabby had lain for the past two hours, trying to get some feeling back in her toes before crawling out of the fort.

"I know both of my feet are asleep," Marissa replied, wincing slightly at the intense tickling sting in them. "And I've had to pee for like an hour." Both women silently got to their knees and crept for the door but as Marissa scooted around the tops of Miranda and AJ's heads she felt a tiny hand graze her ankle and she turned to see AJ peering blearily up at her.

"Are you not gonna sleep in here with us?" he asked sleepily, his voice hoarse from only being half awake. "I made a bed in the other room so you and Bianca could sleep there. Miranda and Gabby helped me move one of the air mattresses in there for you."

"Is that what you were doing in here earlier?" Marissa asked with a glance at the navy sheet separating the other room of the fort from the one they were in, only then realizing that none of them had gone in there the entire night as they were all far too happy to chow on pizza and candy in the room with the TV in it.

AJ nodded against his pillow and Marissa threw a grinning glance at Bianca who was crouched inside the doorway, her face showing the same shock and amusement that Marissa felt. She brushed down AJ's frizzy hair affectionately. "Of course we'll sleep in there buddy," she told him, and her heart swelled at the boy's drowsy grin. "We're just gonna get rid of some of this trash and then we'll be back, okay?"

"K," AJ replied almost inaudibly, his weak voice muffled as he burrowed back into his pillow. "Night mommy. Love you. Night Bianca," he added as he turned his head away. "Love you."

"I love you too buddy," Bianca whispered as she returned to the side of the pallet and leaned down to place a gentle kiss on AJ's forehead before turning to Miranda, whose eyes were fluttering open slightly.

"You and Marissa are gonna sleep in here, right?" she asked, her eyes never opening fully. "We made you a bed."

"I know baby, and thank you for doing that," Bianca whispered as she kissed her cheek. "We'll be back in a little while – we're just gonna clean up a little first."

"Okay," she replied with a languid sigh as her eyes sank closed again. "Night mommy – I love you."

"I love you too Mimo," Bianca said with another kiss to her cheek, and she and Marissa once again made for the door but Miranda's whispered voice pulled them back again.

"I love you too Marissa," she breathed, asleep almost before the words left her mouth and Marissa scooted back to kiss her forehead fondly.

"I love you Mimo," she whispered into her hair, and as her gaze returned to Bianca's she knew without question that they were both thinking the exact same thing;

_Perfect._

/

_I literally cannot stop smiling,_ Bianca thought blissfully as she stood in the darkened kitchen having just dumped the empty pizza boxes in the trash. She leaned back against the counter and placed her palms on the cool granite, still trying to get a grip on the blazing happiness inside her chest. _I can't remember the last time I had such a magical evening. Even with Reese there were never any goofy kid-filled nights like this – there's no way I ever would have convinced her to build a fort with the girls, let alone sleep in one. And having AJ here too just completes it – Miranda and Gabby love him so much and they're already like siblings. And Marissa – good god and then there's Marissa,_ she sighed, working hard to swallow the tears that threatened to burst out of her at the gorgeous picture of the redhead in her mind, spending the entirety of the second movie with Gabby sitting up behind her shoulders playing with her hair while Bianca sat on the floor with Miranda as they gave each other matching manicures. She glanced down at her clumsily painted pink nails and chuckled, remembering AJ's slightly exasperated expression as Miranda had finally convinced him to let her put clear polish on his toes.

_I never imagined it could ever be this way,_ she thought, shaking her head to stop the tears from flowing. _And it's only been like 24 hours – Marissa and I only got together yesterday and already it's just… perfect. More than perfect. It's easy and unforced and just so damned magical. And that look – dear god that look that Marissa kept throwing me all night, that look of pure unadulterated joy and contentment mixed with subtle winks and her stunning smile… I want to see that look on her face every single day._

_Holy shit I've fallen harder than I realized,_ she thought as her hands impulsively gripped the counter tighter at the sudden dizziness that filled her brain and it felt like an invisible hand clamped around her heart, the accompanying terror at the understanding making her pulse quicken frantically. _Okay Bianca – deep breaths here. It's all going to be okay. This is Marissa, and above all else she is still your best friend. Your best friend who has seen you through some of the toughest events of your life, the same woman who flew thousands of miles just to tell me that my custody battle had been won, who fought like hell to win that case in the first place, and who of course helped me kick a door down when a madman attacked us. She didn't run screaming away from me after I admitted what I did to Michael Cambias, she reassured me and went on loving me just the same. And more. She has been the very best constant that I have ever known and that is not going to change now – in fact it's only going to get better. She's in love with me,_ she finished dazedly, her head swimming as a wide smile cut across her face in spite of her dark musings, those words the only ones she needed to settle both her heart and her stomach. _She's in love with me and I am so completely in love with her. That's all I need to know really._

She took a deep breath before pushing herself away from the counter, the dark shadows that drifted across the kitchen doing nothing to dampen her mood as she practically skipped through the door in the direction of the back porch to meet Marissa.

/

_Okay I really don't think I'm going to throw up,_ Marissa thought as she drifted toward the toilet just in case, finally removing her hands from the sink where she'd just splashed cold water onto her pale face. As soon as she and Bianca had finally crawled out of the fort she muttered something about having to use the restroom, immediately sprinting toward the room down the hall as she called over her shoulder that she'd meet Bianca on the back porch in five minutes. But as soon as she reached the silent solace of the bathroom she felt her façade crack without her permission, the rampaging storm in the pit of her stomach nearly doubling her over as she'd eased the door shut as silently as she could manage.

The instant that she heard Miranda's whispered words, so pure and innocent as they'd fallen right from the boundaries of sleep, her stomach had started on a long line of roller-coaster flips and she'd worked hard to force down the wave of emotions so that Bianca wouldn't see, but as she inched slowly in the direction of the commode she wondered for the first time why she'd done it.

_It's okay to let Bianca see this weakness,_ she reprimanded herself, refusing to get any closer to the toilet than a few feet as she repeatedly told herself that she was not going to puke all over it. _Bianca's your girlfriend now – she's your best friend. You're supposed to share this stuff with her… you're supposed to tell her that you've somehow become so ridiculously happy over the past 24 hours that you are now beginning to get physically ill from the strain. You're supposed to tell her that hearing her daughter whisper that she loves me nearly cracked my chest wide open as my stomach tried desperately to make me revisit all the pizza I ate._

_Good god I have to get a grip, I can't let Bianca see me crying – not now,_ Marissa told herself forcefully as she unraveled some toilet paper to wipe her eyes, the sudden eruption of tears streaking the last remnants of her eye makeup and she wiped her eyes clumsily, more tears only replacing the ones she got rid of and she had to laugh aloud at herself.

_I've never actually cried because I was _too_ happy before,_ she thought, images of the evening flashing across her mind. Gabby playing with her hair for over an hour, chattering at her about how she was going to open a beauty shop when she grew up; Bianca laying on the floor playing cards with Miranda and AJ, the game turning into a tickle fight as the three bounced around the fort and laughed so hard that they could barely breathe; Miranda resting her head on her shoulder during the last movie as she dozed off contentedly, the floral scent of her braided hair filling her nose as Marissa forced herself not to move so that the girl could stay comfortable. It had all been so overwhelmingly perfect, the fiery hot ball of love and adoration in her chest only growing over the course of the night, exploding nearly painfully as Miranda had whispered to her just minutes before and now she stood examining her tear-streaked face in the mirror.

"Bianca," she whispered into the silence, the sound of her love's name forcing her heart to quit thumping quite so loudly inside her ears, the image of her dazzling face playing across her mind and calming her nerves from her shoulders to her toes. _I owe all of this to Bianca,_ she thought, a wide smile creeping onto her face. _All of this is only made more impossibly perfect by the fact that I'm sharing it with Bianca. How did I miss this for so long? What was I so afraid of? Of being called a name that really doesn't mean anything anyway? No – love is love and the amount I have for that incredible woman should have been indication enough. I am more in love with her than I have ever been before and now I have the most perfect kind of family as long as she's in it. I love Miranda and Gabby more than I ever realized – I can hardly fathom all of this._

She forced a steadying breath and blinked rapidly, trying to keep her blood-shot eyes from giving her away once she left the bathroom but she knew it wouldn't work – her only hope would be that the darkness outside would shield her girlfriend from seeing that she'd just spent the past five minutes bawling like an infant.

_Yeah right,_ she thought with a resolving sigh. _Bianca doesn't miss anything._

And that thought actually cheered her further as she sucked in a deep breath and headed swiftly in her direction.

/

"Well hello again," Bianca said softly as Marissa came up behind her and wrapped her arms around her waist, laying a reverent kiss on her cheek as her lips lingered there and Bianca closed her eyes and leaned into the redhead.

"Hello," Marissa whispered into her ear, her voice husky as Bianca turned in her arms to face her.

"What's wrong?" she asked, her eyebrows immediately inching downward in a worried scowl as her hands came up to Marissa's face, her thumb running a gentle line across her bottom eyelid trying to smooth down the remaining moisture from her recent tears.

"Nothing's wrong," Marissa told her breathily, swooping forward to claim Bianca's lips, kissing the woman with all the passion and emotion she had experienced over the course of the evening. Bianca's hands gripped her back firmly while Marissa's clung to Bianca's neck, the two women melting into one another for long seconds that turned to minutes without either of them noticing, each completely lost in the other and before they knew it they had sunk down onto the outdoor sofa where they'd slept the previous night, Marissa sitting so close to the brunette that she was basically in her lap. When they finally pulled breathlessly away Marissa dropped her forehead to rest softly against Bianca's and they gazed lovingly into one another's eyes, both sets shining happily from the hazy glow of the moon.

"You've been crying," Bianca said a moment later, a hand returning to Marissa's face to rub her cheek tenderly.

"I was, but only because I'm so outrageously happy," Marissa admitted with a smile. "I just couldn't seem to help myself."

"Is that why you bolted off to the bathroom?" Bianca asked her, and once again Marissa was unsurprised at her capacity to read her so thoroughly.

She nodded sheepishly. "Well I did have to pee but I really didn't want you to see me crying, but after what Miranda said I literally couldn't stop myself."

"I can understand," Bianca agreed. "Hearing both of them just about made me start bawling right there in front of them. But Riss – I don't want you to feel like you can't show me that side of you."

"I don't feel like that Bee," Marissa told her. "I just – I don't know. For some reason I thought that maybe you would see me start crying and think that something was wrong when it's actually just so goddamned perfect. I didn't want to startle you."

Bianca smiled warmly at her and kissed her cheek softly. "I can see that you're happy Marissa," she assured her. "And that makes me happier than I could ever explain. I can see it in your eyes and in the way you smiled so beautifully all day long – and your wonderful laughter with the kids all night. I'd give anything to see this side of you every single day for the rest of my life."

"Anything?" Marissa managed to ask gruffly, mustering up the remainder of her voice as the tears started building again, and Bianca nodded and leaned forward for a quick kiss.

"Absolutely anything," she whispered.

Marissa cleared her throat. "Just tell me that you're in love with me," she requested, her eyes sparkling with her renewed tears and her heart soared at Bianca's immediate smile.

"I am so in love with you," she told her evenly, surging forward and soon both women were lost again in a body-shaking kiss that neither wanted to pull away from as wandering hands began to roam, Marissa delighting in the sensuous smoothness of Bianca's skin as her velvety lips pressed against her own making her head swim so uncontrollably that for a long moment she was totally incapable of registering anything outside of the feeling of the brunette in her arms. _Dear god – what is she doing to me?_ was her one fractured thought, and when Bianca's lissome fingers crept beneath her shirt all rationale left her mind completely.

/

"It's almost two in the morning," Bianca said over an hour later as she lay back comfortably on the couch with Marissa's head on her chest, their legs tangled together and their arms wrapped tightly around the other.

Marissa grinned and inhaled slowly, relishing the comforting smell of Bianca's perfume on her t-shirt and she nuzzled her nose into it. "Really? I hadn't noticed," she breathed. "I was too preoccupied making out with my beautiful girlfriend to check the time."

"Ha – me too," Bianca chuckled. "But once we finally ran out of air it kind of seemed pertinent for one of us to do it. We still have sleeping children upstairs, mind."

"'Sleeping' being the operative word," Marissa replied as she lifted her head to rest her chin on Bianca's chest to gaze at her. "They're so wiped out from today that they'll sleep soundly till noon, I guarantee."

"We can only hope," Bianca yawned as she brushed the wayward bangs from Marissa's eyes. "Considering we're running on about five hours of sleep from last night you and I both are going to need our beauty sleep as well if we're going to keep up with them tomorrow."

"Do we have a plan for tomorrow's festivities?"

"Well I'd already arranged with Kendall to meet her and the boys at Krystal's before having a play-date in the park," Bianca told her. "I'm sure Spike and Ian will be thrilled that AJ's going to tag along." Marissa nodded but stayed silent, a wide range of emotions drifting across her contemplative face and Bianca looked a question at her. "What?"

"Well…" Marissa began slowly, finally moving to sit up properly and Bianca followed her. "I was just thinking that that may be the perfect time to uh – start spreading the love, if you get what I mean."

Bianca's eyebrows crawled up her forehead. "You – you mean you want to tell everybody about us tomorrow?" she asked tentatively, trying to conceal the shock in her voice but of course Marissa picked up on it.

She leaned forward and kissed the brunette tenderly before responding. "Bianca I really don't see the point in keeping this to ourselves," she told her flatly. "If what's tripping you up is the fact that this is my first relationship with a woman then please do me a favor and cut it out. I know what I want and I'm not afraid of anything, not since I have you in my life. And I'm certainly not afraid of Krystal or your sister and they seem like the perfect place to start anyway. Don't you agree?"

"Uh – yeah," Bianca conceded after a stunned moment of staring at the redhead, once again her unfounded self-assuredness sending her into a tailspin. "I guess I just want to make sure that you really understand what you're getting yourself into. I know you say you're not scared and that's incredible but there are other things to consider."

"Like?"

"Well like the fact that yesterday you still lived at the Chandler's and to everyone around you it appeared as though you and JR were on the highway back to reconciling."

Marissa sat back slightly and peered intently at the brunette. "Okay you're right – I hadn't actually considered that part. But before you get all smug I'll just say that I really don't give a flying shit what anybody thinks and that includes their opinions on our _lesbian_ relationship as well as how it might appear against my whole thing with JR. After what he did – what he's _always_ done – I really just don't care. About him _or_ about how it might look that I've moved on already. As far as I'm concerned everybody can just keep their opinions to themselves."

Bianca blinked for a few seconds before smirking. "Did you just call yourself a lesbian?"

Marissa smiled and laughed quietly. "Not exactly…"

Bianca raised an eyebrow. "Kinda you did. A little bit."

"Well… I mean… okay yeah. Sort of."

"Sort of," Bianca repeated, her amused grin falling away as her expression turned serious again. "You know you don't really have to label yourself here Riss. The fact that you fell in love with me doesn't change who you are."

"I know that," Marissa assured her, unable to keep from leaning forward for another quick kiss as she continued. "But the fact is that that's what people will call me – what they'll call us. And while you've always embraced it because that's a part of who you are, I am a little new at it. I've never been attracted to other women before and so I don't know if that will change since I'm so attracted to you. But the real truth is that I don't plan on looking at anybody else ever again, man or woman, and so if that makes me a lesbian then so be it. Somebody give me my welcome package."

"No welcome package, only me," Bianca replied with a smile that reached her ears, Marissa's inherent charisma charming the hell out of her.

Marissa leaned toward her and smiled just as widely, both her hands gliding up to her cheeks as she pulled her in. "Even better," she said against Bianca's still smiling mouth, the two sharing a lingering tender kiss that sent shivers tumbling down their spines.

When they pulled back Bianca inhaled deeply and rested her forehead against Marissa's again. "So you'll tell Krystal tomorrow and I'll tell Kendall."

"That's the plan," Marissa agreed. "Truthfully I feel like Krystal's going to be happier than you'd expect. You know how much she hates JR so I think she'd be happy that I'm with anybody as long as it's not him. Plus she loves you."

"Well I'll try to make that feeling mutual," Bianca said. "Although we certainly have come a long way over the years. I really don't mind her now and the fact that she's important to you actually helps exponentially."

"I know you've had your issues with her," Marissa told her soothingly, winding her fingers into her flowing hair. "And god knows I have mine with her too. But deep down she is a good person and I think you know that."

"I do," Bianca agreed, incapable of doing anything but agreeing as she lost herself to the glistening honey pools of Marissa's incredible eyes. "And I have a little confession…"

"Oh?" Marissa asked. "What's that?"

"Uh – Kendall already knows. About how I feel about you anyway," Bianca admitted, her eyes darting downward involuntarily. "She's the one who convinced me to give you the music box yesterday. I ran into her at the Yacht Club and she and I got to talking about everything."

"You weren't going to give me the music box?" Marissa asked, suddenly completely confused. "Why not?"

Bianca shrugged timidly but charged forward. "Same old story really. I was afraid that by giving it to you it would be too much of a tell about how I really felt and I was terrified of scaring you, especially because of how things seemed to be going with JR. I was just being a coward but Kendall of course talked some sense into me."

"Bianca you are anything but a coward," Marissa told her forcefully, gripping her chin and pulling her face back up to meet her eyes. "You are the bravest person I have ever known in my life. If anybody is the coward in this situation it's me for running away from it for so long."

"Okay you asked me to quit questioning your resolve about being with a woman and I'm going to ask you to quit beating yourself up for that," Bianca said. "That just doesn't matter anymore. We're together now and that's all that counts. Right now. I'm here holding you and you're holding me back and our kids are asleep upstairs. That's what's important. Everything else is just background noise, remember?"

"I remember," Marissa croaked. "You have yourself a deal."

"Good."

Marissa's smile lingered on her face as she peered lovingly at Bianca, and after a brief moment the brunette shook her head slightly and asked "What?"

"Our kids," Marissa said somewhat breathlessly. "You said 'our kids'."

"You said it earlier," Bianca reminded her. "And it's the truth isn't it?"

Marissa could only nod as she captured Bianca's lips again, pushing her back down against the cushions but she made herself pull away before they got completely lost again. She slid her head back onto Bianca's chest and listened to her steady heartbeat for a while, the smooth rhythm of her breathing matching her own and she sighed happily into the still night. "Bianca?" she asked after a few quiet minutes.

"Hmm?" Bianca hummed, and Marissa heard the sound echo inside her chest.

"Can I stay here at Wildwind with you?" she asked softly. "At least until I find a place of my own."

"You can stay here with me forever," Bianca breathed in reply, and Marissa heard her heart rate quicken beneath her ear. "I wish you would stay."

"I'm not ever going to want to leave, I'm positive of that," Marissa assured her, lifting her chin to start a trail of kisses from her clavicle to her ear, but Bianca's hands found her cheeks and pulled her to her.

"Please don't," she said, her voice overcome with cracking emotion as the two women gazed adoringly into the other's eyes for a long moment.

_My god I've never seen anything more stunning,_ Marissa thought as she looked down at Bianca, her luscious brown hair splayed out on the cushion beneath her, wreathing her head in silky flowing locks that she wanted nothing more than to tangle her fingers into. _I've fallen harder than I thought possible._

Bianca's hands brushed Marissa's falling hair back from her face, tucking it smoothly behind her ear as she laid there entirely incapable of speech. _How in the world did I get this lucky?_ she thought dreamily, memorizing the way the moon glinted off her shining red hair, illuminating her already spectacularly glowing face. _I must not have ever been truly happy before…_

Marissa leaned down slowly and kissed her gently at first, her hands forcing their way under Bianca's back as she clutched her closer and the two rolled over so that they were both on their sides, but in spite of both women's escalating desire for the other they pulled apart after only a moment.

Bianca took a deep breath. "Riss?" she asked, and the redhead blinked languorously at her.

"Hmm?"

"Are you about to pass out?"

Marissa smiled and nodded, burying her head in Bianca's shoulder. "Definitely," she replied, wave after wave of heavy fatigue crashing down her body, making her muscles feel denser than normal. "I think the events of the past 24 hours have finally caught up with me."

"Thank goodness – me too," Bianca groaned. "I think maybe we should head back upstairs before our legs quit working altogether."

"Another great plan," Marissa agreed as the two climbed achingly from the couch. "And besides – we have a bed painstakingly put together by our thoughtful children to sleep in and it's calling my name."

"_Our_ thoughtful children?" Bianca asked with a sly grin, and Marissa walked forward and hugged her tightly.

"Yep – _our_ thoughtful children."


	8. Real World: Pine Valley Part II

**Okay confession… I'm rushing because I'm quickly running out of time to get this done. Or at least to an adequate stopping place before real life comes back to bitch-slap me a little bit. I charged through this chapter really so that I could get to the next one, which I've been steadily working on for about a week now and it's the – ahem – culmination of Perfect Weekend Numero Uno. But I also couldn't skip the day in between as there are still important real world issues silently awaiting our lovelies' attention.**

**So there will be one more chapter after this one followed by at least a two-week hiatus on my part, after which I'll have to decide exactly what I want to do to wrap this story up – or keep going on, whichever seems to work best for the direction I've steered them. And suggestions are always welcome and appreciated, as other Minxbian writers and readers will of course be my best source of outside help but I really can't keep walking through every single second of their lives, no matter how much I might want to.**

**So anyway, today we're focusing on Kendall and Krystal and Bianca and Marissa, with a little JR folly for color and effect. As I'm sure you've gathered I'm really not a fan of his and will treat him as more of an infuriating complication than anything. It's the return of the flaming Dipshit…**

_**Real World: Pine Valley**_

_**Part II – Krystal's**_

"Shhhhh… don't wake them up yet."

"Why not?"

"Because Gabby – if we let them sleep then we can have candy for breakfast."

"Yeah and we can go downstairs and play video games if they're gonna sleep for a while."

"How do we know how long they gonna sleep?"

"We don't but if you don't shush then they'll wake up right now and then we'll have to have egg whites or something for breakfast instead of candy. Do you want to have egg whites for breakfast Gabby?"

There was a short pause. "No," Gabby finally whispered, and Marissa saw the side of the fort sway as all three shadows disappeared cautiously through the opening. She sighed and rolled over slightly, burrowing warmly against the still sleeping Bianca and draped her arm gently across her stomach and she savored the smooth up and down of her steady breathing. She lifted her head to examine her girlfriend's peaceful face and grinned as she noticed her eyes fluttering beneath her eyelids, wondering what she was possibly dreaming about.

After a moment she could hold out no longer as Bianca's intrinsic beauty got the best of her and she leaned forward and placed her lips tenderly against the brunette's, Bianca's sluggish sigh only spurring her forward as she rolled herself on top of her completely, but before Bianca's eyes opened she felt her lips begin to move to kiss her back. When Marissa had gotten her fill she pulled back and watched Bianca's eyelids slowly lift and she finally gazed into those stunning chocolate pools again.

"Every morning," Bianca rasped quietly, and Marissa's eyebrows scrunched in confusion.

"You mean good morning?"

Bianca chuckled softly as she brushed the bangs from Marissa's forehead. "No I mean every morning. Please wake me up like that every morning."

"Ah," Marissa said with a happy grin. "Well what if you wake up first?"

"Well then I guess I'll have to wake you up like that," she replied as she lifted her head for another quick kiss before resettling on the pillow and once again Marissa indulged her fingers in her luscious hair. "It's just about the best way to wake up. I can't wait for you to experience it."

"I could always just roll over and doze off again…" Marissa suggested playfully as she leaned her body to the side but Bianca's firm arms grasped around her back and held her in her place.

"No – I think it would be best to just wait for another morning. I can see plenty of opportunities ahead. And besides – I'm not ready to move yet."

"Me neither, but the kids just snuck out with the intention of gorging themselves on candy again."

Bianca groaned and sat up slightly. "Wonderful – we should probably go catch them before they make themselves sick. We probably let them have too much last night as it is."

"Eh – it's their stomachache," Marissa replied lightly, and Bianca's eyes flashed with amusement.

"You think so?"

"Yep. Plus I went downstairs in the middle of the night for some water and hid the rest of the stash so they couldn't get to it," she supplied with a sly smile. "I figured we might run into this problem this morning since we didn't tell them no at all yesterday. Today's the day we have to reestablish the rules and I thought the best way to do that would be to eliminate the problem."

"How very wise of you," Bianca approved, grinning crookedly at the redhead. "I love that you plan ahead."

Marissa shrugged. "Mom duties never cease, even at four in the morning."

"I hear that," Bianca agreed as she lifted up the sheet into the larger room of the fort and glanced at the clock on the DVD player. "Well it's almost eleven so they made it longer than I thought they would. And so did we – I'm surprised I slept so well on this squeaky air mattress."

"I know I slept like a log once I got back up here. And you – I don't think you moved an inch from the time I got up to when I got back and I was afraid that me moving around so much would wake you up but you were sleeping like death."

"You could have woken me up."

"Why?" Marissa questioned her. "You look ravishing when you sleep so why would I want to disrupt the beauty when I could just lie there and stare at you to my heart's content?"

"My you are quite the charmer Tasker," Bianca replied and Marissa grinned impishly at her and winked. "Yeah – either that or you're kinda creepy. Take your pick."

Marissa reached behind her and grabbed a pillow, launching it at the brunette who started laughing hysterically as it bounced off her head. "Oh and you're just as charming yourself, jerk," she giggled as the static from the tossed pillow made Bianca's hair stand up slightly, and Marissa's breath caught in her chest at the sight. _Good god she is so incredibly stunning in the morning…_

Bianca smoothed her hair out and leapt forward as her arms wrapped tightly around Marissa's shoulders and the two toppled over, Bianca's long hair falling in wavy curtains around them as she kissed the redhead again. Marissa felt her lips smile against hers as both continued to chuckle blithely, and after a few seconds Bianca rolled off of her and rested her head on her elbow. "I was trying to give you a compliment you know…" Marissa told her.

"Oh yeah, I got that," Bianca replied with a wide smile. "I guess it's just going to take some time before I get used to waking up with you like this."

"Well get used to it," Marissa said softly, the conversation suddenly serious as their eyes zeroed in on each other again. "I'm not going anywhere."

Bianca swallowed hard and nodded slowly. "Me neither."

/

"Okay guys remember the deal," Bianca said two hours later as she twisted around from the driver's seat to address the three children in the back. "No talking about Marissa and I until we talk to Kendall and Krystal first, got it?"

"Why not?" Gabby asked, innocently tugging at the bottom of one of her pigtails. "You said last night that we's a family now."

"We are baby, don't worry," Marissa reassured her. "We just haven't told anybody that except you guys and we want the chance to tell Kendall and Krystal the same way, understand?"

"Yeah," Miranda and AJ replied in unison, each unbuckling and hopping quickly from the car. Bianca got out and went to free little Gabby from her car seat as Marissa tugged at the back of AJ's shirt before he followed Miranda into Krystal's.

"Hold up buddy, I need to talk to you a second," she told him, and the two made their way to a bench near the door as Bianca and Gabby went inside after Miranda. Bianca made sure to share a reassuring smile with Marissa before the door closed behind her, mentally urging her forward and hoping that her advice from earlier would help her through the conversation.

"What's up?" AJ asked his mother as they sat down, and Marissa slowly allowed her held breath to leak from her chest.

"Well, I just kinda wanted to talk to you alone for a minute and see how you're dealing with everything that happened yesterday," she said as she absently tucked his flyaway blonde hair out of his face. "You still happy?"

"Yeah!" AJ exclaimed with another toothless smile that forced a return from Marissa. "Yesterday was so much fun! Can we sleep in the fort again tonight?"

"We'll have to see buddy, you have school tomorrow," she replied. "And afterward your dad is gonna pick you up and you'll go home with him again, you remember?" AJ's shoulders slumped slightly and his eyes lowered to gaze at his hands as he sighed heavily. "What's wrong buddy?" Marissa asked tentatively, her chest constricting at his expression for fear that it still had something to do with how AJ was acting when she'd picked him up. "You can tell me."

"Nothing's wrong really," AJ told her quietly. "I'm just kinda bummed that I don't get to stay with you and Bianca and the girls, that's all."

"I know buddy, we'll all miss you like crazy," Marissa assured him. "But you'll be back to stay with us before you know it, I promise." AJ nodded but his sad expression didn't lift so Marissa forced herself to ask the question she was dreading. "This… this has nothing to do with your dad yelling at you on Friday, does it buddy? Because if you're still scared for some reason then I want you to talk to me about it."

"No I'm not scared," AJ replied. "I just… I don't know. Daddy works all the time and he's always yelling into his cell phone and sometimes I feel like he really doesn't have time for me. But with you and Bianca and Miranda and Gabby it's better – we get to build forts and play games all weekend and you're always around. It's just more fun I guess… I don't have to play video games by myself as much. But it's okay I guess…"

Marissa scooted toward her son and wrapped him tightly inside her arms as she leaned her cheek against the top of his head so he wouldn't see the silent tears that had started to fall. "Buddy you know your daddy loves you," she told him, and AJ nodded again. "I know he works a lot but it's because he's trying so hard to make sure you have everything you need. And you know what? You can always call me whenever you want to. I don't care if it's the middle of the night – I'll always answer for you, I promise."

"Double promise?" AJ asked, and Marissa chuckled softly as she lifted up her pinky for her son.

"Double pinky promise," she said as AJ's tiny finger enclosed firmly around her own. "There's no one more important to me in this whole world than you."

"Me too," AJ replied, finally grinning again as he lifted his head. "And I'm glad you get to be happy with Bianca and Miranda and Gabby all the time now."

"Thanks buddy," Marissa smiled at the boy, her heart once again bursting with affection for his sideways grin. "And I need to talk to you about that too. I know Bianca and I talked to all three of you kids earlier about not saying anything about us to Kendall or Krystal until later this afternoon once we've talked to them, but you and I didn't really get to talk about telling your dad."

"Why does dad have to know?"

Marissa backpedaled slightly, sitting back momentarily as she tried to figure out where the question had come from. "What do you mean?"

"Well I don't know… daddy doesn't really have anything to do with you loving Bianca does he?"

"No buddy he doesn't. I fell in love with Bianca without any influence from anybody but her."

"Right – so then maybe it's just not daddy's business you know?" AJ ventured. "He didn't make you happy but Bianca did and besides I don't want him to get mad again, especially if I'm going to be there with him alone now."

"Buddy are you really okay about what happened with him on Friday?" Marissa tried again, and this time she saw the resolve crack on her son's face and she shivered involuntarily as she braced herself.

AJ's reply was so quiet that Marissa almost missed it, but as she leaned forward she heard him whisper, "I don't want to worry you now that you're so happy mommy."

"AJ don't worry about that," she told him as she rubbed his back comfortingly. "Just tell me what's bothering you because now I'm just worrying about you."

"Well…" AJ started slowly, and Marissa found herself holding her breath painfully. "It's just… daddy was kind of… he was yelling louder than I've ever heard him yell before."

"Well what was he yelling about?"

"You mostly," AJ supplied softly with a tentative glance up at his mother. "I don't know who he was talking to but his voice was shaking and he kept using swear words and when he heard me behind him he turned around and even used one at me. That's when I ran away."

"What did he say to you baby?" she croaked, her eyes now shining with angry tears.

It took the boy a moment to respond but finally his eyes lifted back to his mother's as he spoke. "He said 'get the… F word… out of here AJ'."

Marissa's hand instinctively clutched the boy's neck as she pulled him back in again, her tears spilling over as she wildly attempted to tame the livid anger in her chest but as AJ's beautiful blonde head laid tenderly against it she felt her whole body relax as she squeezed him tighter and the boy's arms lifted to hold her back. "I'm so so sorry baby," she whispered as she kissed his hair. "There's no excuse for your daddy to ever use harsh language with you and I'm going to talk to him about it. Don't worry."

"No please don't," AJ said quickly as his head shot upward, his green eyes flashing with concern. "I don't want him to think that I tattled on him or to yell at me again for it. It's okay – he came up a while later and apologized so it's okay. Really."

_No it is not okay,_ Marissa silently fumed, beating back the mental image in her mind of her pounding her ex-husband with a baseball bat for scaring their son so badly. She took a deep breath and forced her voice not to shake as she replied. "AJ you should never be scared of your dad yelling or cursing at you and if you are then that's a problem. Are you afraid for him to pick you up tomorrow after school?"

"He won't pick me up – the sitter will," AJ told her sadly. "He probably won't even be home before bedtime. He never usually is so no I'm not really scared of him mommy, honest."

"Well how about I arrange with daddy for me to pick you up and then we can get a snack before I drop you back at the house," Marissa suggested, and AJ's eyes lit up again. "We might even be able to get Miranda and Gabby too. Would that make you feel better?"

"And Bianca?" AJ asked as he bounced forward on the bench. "Can Bianca come too? We can all go get ice cream!"

"That sounds perfect," Marissa replied as her heart soared again at AJ's happiness to always include Bianca. "I'll call daddy this afternoon and set it up."

AJ threw his arms around her neck and hugged her hard. "Thanks mommy!"

"You're welcome buddy – anything for you." But as AJ sat back again his eyes locked seriously with hers and she tilted her head in question. "What?"

"Are you gonna tell daddy that you love Bianca?"

"Do you think that I should?"

"No," AJ replied immediately. "He was shouting the loudest about how he had to do something to get you back again so I think if he finds out that you're a couple with Bianca now that he'll just get angry again – maybe angrier. I don't want to make him angry again."

_Shit – I knew he wasn't really through yet,_ Marissa thought darkly at AJ's revelation. _What in the world is he going to have up his sleeve this time?_ "Okay AJ – we'll wait to tell your dad," she agreed after a moment. "But honestly buddy he's going to find out eventually. We don't want to keep our new happy family a secret and I also don't want your dad to hear about it somewhere else. That will only make it worse."

AJ thought about it for a moment and then replied. "What about next weekend then?" he asked. "Maybe by then all of his anger might have disappeared and he'll see how happy you are now. If he loves you then he'll be happy you're happy, right?"

And once again Marissa thought she had a mini heart attack at her son's beautifully innocent outlook. "Yeah buddy," she stuttered. "Yeah that's right."

AJ smiled widely and kissed his mother's cheek as he hopped off the bench. He grabbed her hand and tugged her gently for the door. "Okay good now let's go eat. I'm starving!"

But Marissa pulled his hand back so he turned around and she knelt down until she was eye-level with him. "You understand that your dad will always be your family too, right AJ?" she asked. "Me and your dad not being together doesn't mean that we're not still family."

"I know," AJ replied brightly. "Now we're just a bigger, different kind of family right? And because we're bigger that just means there's more love to go around right?"

"That's exactly right buddy," Marissa replied with a beaming smile. "You are so so smart AJ, and the greatest little boy that ever lived." She kissed his cheek before standing up, AJ's renewed grin only furthering Marissa's overflowing heart.

AJ didn't reply as he released her hand to hold the door open for her, and as she passed the little gentleman she realized that his sunny smile was really the only thing that mattered.

/

"Well _that_ didn't go exactly how I thought it would…" Bianca said as she and Marissa followed Miranda, AJ, Gabby and Spike into the park and the four kids sprinted screaming toward the playground.

"Yeah I know… I hope Kendall and Ian hurry back so maybe we can still salvage part of our plan," Marissa replied with a sigh as she and the brunette made their way over to a bench nearby where they could watch the kids. "Even if we could manage to tell her today I would feel better."

"A little excited are we?" Bianca asked with a raised eyebrow as Marissa grinned crookedly at her.

"Perhaps…" she said, planting a quick kiss on Bianca's cheek. "I was just really hoping to tell at least _one_ of them today."

"Well I think Kendall and Ian will be back pretty quickly," Bianca replied. "I don't think she was going to give him a bath or anything – just a change of clothes."

Bianca and Marissa had both made valiant efforts during their short lunch at Krystal's to break away from the crowded table with their respective family member and share their news, but Krystal had been so slammed with the lunch rush that she was barely seen for more than three or four minutes and Kendall had had to rush home with Ian about ten minutes into the meal to change the toddler out of the shirt and pants that Spike had accidentally spilled his soda all over. That had left the two with four children to tame and then escort to the park, and as Marissa watched them play she couldn't help but smile broadly despite her slight downheartedness at her failed attempts with her mother.

"So how'd it go with AJ earlier?" Bianca asked, relieved to finally be able to find out since they hadn't been able to talk over the chattering children all through lunch. "Is he still doing okay with everything? What did he say about JR?"

"Oh yeah – that," Marissa replied darkly, finally remembering the conversation with her son earlier as it's lingering anger had faded in the presence of the kids and Bianca. "Well he might have left out a few details about what exactly JR was shouting about on Friday that scared him so much."

"Uh oh – like what?"

"Well like the fact that JR was cussing up a storm and when he heard AJ come in he screamed at him to get the fuck out and no, I'm not filtering his language."

"What!" Bianca gasped, her cheeks immediately flushing with anger but Marissa placed a hand on her arm to calm her.

"I know, believe me I wanted to snatch up my cell phone and call that jackass and send him a few choice words of my own," she told her, "but AJ was still so upset by it that I didn't want to make it worse by reacting just as badly as JR has. AJ needs somebody to be an emotional constant for him and in all honesty JR's elusive anger returning doesn't really surprise me but he certainly doesn't get to take it out on AJ."

"No he doesn't," Bianca seethed with her teeth clenched. "I'd like to give that jerk a piece of my mind…"

"Me too Bee," Marissa sighed, "but I think we both know that would only make it worse. Especially since AJ also informed me that JR was yelling so loudly about me and how he had to do something to get me back."

Bianca's stomach turned over at this and she swallowed hard to tame it, forcing her eyes to meet Marissa's without giving away her overwrought and sudden terror. "He – he was shouting about trying to get you back? To who?"

"AJ didn't know, and I don't think it matters. All I think it means is that JR's little stunt yesterday may not be the only one he has planned."

"But you told him then that it was over between the two of you right?" Bianca asked shakily, and Marissa's angry expression softened completely as she brought a hand up to her cheek.

"Bianca," she began quietly, smiling reassuringly at her girlfriend. "Whatever JR may or may not have planned will not change what happened with us this weekend, I swear. I'm only telling you so that we can be prepared for whatever he's got coming. We'll deal with it together, okay?"

"Deal," Bianca replied, and she glanced quickly around the park before leaning forward to steal a quick kiss. "So what do you think that could be?"

"I have no idea but knowing JR it could be anything. Although after the way we left it yesterday I really don't know what else he thinks he's going to be able to do. I hope I made myself perfectly clear about what I think about him."

"Well I certainly thought so," Bianca told her with a grin. "So then what are we going to do about telling him about us? We don't want to make things worse."

"Well you know my insanely intelligent son agrees with you there," Marissa responded as she turned to scan the jungle gym for AJ, who was swinging across the monkey bars behind Spike. "He pretty much begged me not to tell JR yet, but only because he was afraid of making him yell again. But on the plus side he also seemed perfectly at ease with everything else, apparently not scared at all of what me being with you could mean."

"That's because he doesn't really know what to expect yet," Bianca told her. "To him and with the values he was raised on it doesn't seem extraordinary at all that his mother would suddenly fall for a woman but sadly he's going to find out that that's not always the widely accepted viewpoint. Although I really hope we can shield him from most of it but you know how kids are… you remember last month when that kid called me a lezzy and he got in a fight over it. That might only get worse now."

"Well at least he's got the instinct," Marissa said as she watched her son intently, relishing his loud laughter as he skipped around after Miranda in the sunshine. "I know it'll be an adjustment for him…"

"Which is why Miranda and I talked about it before you and AJ came into Krystal's earlier," Bianca said and Marissa gazed questioningly at her as she continued. "Miranda voiced concern for AJ for that very reason – that having two mommies _is_ a little different just because of how some people treat you and she said she was going to make sure that they watched out for each other, at school and everywhere else. She said that she 'needs to make sure and take extra special care of her brother now'."

"She called AJ her brother?" Marissa asked incredulously, and Bianca nodded happily.

"Yep, they certainly seem to have grasped that concept the quickest of all."

"Well honestly I think they were both kinda there already which is helping more than anything," Marissa mused. "They've always been like brother and sister so I think that's why they're so excited because now it's real for them." She smiled softly as she watched the two kids chase each other across the crunching rocks with Spike and Gabby behind them, losing herself momentarily to the blissful perfection of the picture and the heartwarming sound of their constant laughter._ Good god I just keep getting happier,_ she thought dreamily. _In spite of all the unresolved stuff with JR I just can't seem to keep from smiling till my cheeks ache. This is _definitely_ the way it should have been…_

She turned back to face Bianca, a little surprised to see that she wasn't eyeing the playing children but instead she stared unblinking back at her, her smile so impossibly wide that Marissa couldn't help but return it. She tilted her head in question and Bianca sighed serenely as she sat forward.

"I am just so in love with you," she said steadily, bringing both of her hands up to cup Marissa's face and the redhead inhaled deeply at the comforting sensation. "And I still just can't believe this is really happening. How did it get this perfect?"

"Because you're so perfect," Marissa said instantly, blushing slightly under Bianca's palms at her unfiltered cheesiness. "I mean… well yeah – because you're so perfect."

"Ditto to that," Bianca grinned as she leaned forward, and Marissa thought only briefly about the fact that they were in public before releasing the thought, her girlfriend's insatiable lips so impossible to resist and she likely would have willingly lost herself inside them for a good while but after only two seconds the women ripped apart as an outside voice intruded into their moment.

"Uhhh… what's happening over here?" came Kendall's voice from behind them and both women whirled around to see Bianca's older sister standing next to Krystal not ten feet away, Kendall with her arms folded in front of her chest and an amused expression on her face while Krystal stood beside her with her mouth hanging open. "This is uh – a new development I see…"

"New indeed," Krystal breathed. "What's uh – what's going on here? Are you two…?"

"We're together now Krystal, yeah," Marissa responded, immediately rising from the bench to stroll over to the other two and she took Bianca's hand firmly as she followed her. "I tried to tell you earlier but you were so busy that I didn't want to bother you. But yes – Bianca and I have fallen in love and we're going to be together now."

Krystal stood granite-still as she blinked slowly at her daughter while Kendall charged forward and threw her arms around her sister. "Oh my god Binx I'm so happy for you!" she shrieked, lunging for Marissa after releasing Bianca and the redhead felt all the air leave her lungs as Kendall's iron grip engulfed her. "And Marissa! I knew it! I _knew_ there was something more about the way you felt for her! I'm so glad you guys have finally figured it out! This is so wonderful!"

"Thanks Kendall," Marissa told her, still eyeing her mother cautiously as she was finally freed from her arms.

"Okay – details!" Kendall exclaimed as she pulled the two by the wrists back over to the bench and forced them to sit again. "Just… you know… don't go too far if you know what I mean. Just tell me how this happened! When did it happen? How did it happen? Where did it happen? What does it mean?"

"Okay Kendall, slow down," Bianca told her, turning along with Marissa to gaze back at Krystal who still hadn't moved from her spot ten feet away. Kendall got the hint and fell silent, the three women on the bench now waiting for whatever reaction would come.

"Krystal?" Marissa tried after a moment, and the woman's eyes finally lifted to meet her daughter's.

"So… so you two are in love huh?" she asked, and Marissa couldn't decide if her voice was so quiet because she was shocked or because she was upset.

"Yes," she told her evenly, rising once again to stand in front of her. Mother and daughter locked gazes as Krystal nodded slowly, and Marissa was suddenly compelled to explain herself. "I've been falling in love with her for a while now and last Friday we finally managed to talk about it. I had a huge fight with JR and moved out of the mansion and now I'm staying with Bianca and the girls at Wildwind. I am _completely_ done with JR and am truly happy for the first time in my life, and that's because of Bianca. I love her."

Kendall beamed silently at her sister as she rubbed her back happily, Bianca's teary smile at Marissa's words the only real proof she required, though she did find herself quite impressed by the redhead's pluck. Krystal continued to nod as Marissa spoke and as she finished she swallowed hard and smiled slowly, stepping silently forward to wrap her arms around her daughter.

"I am so happy for you," she whispered in her ear, and Marissa closed her eyes and leaned into the woman, intense relief washing across her shaky limbs. "I thought something had changed between you two this morning," Krystal went on as she pulled back again, now smiling broadly. "And I've had a suspicion for a little over a month now. I'm glad you two have finally worked it out."

"You knew?" Marissa asked dubiously. "How?"

"Oh please, you two have been making eyes at each other across my restaurant for ages," Krystal said airily with a wave of her hand. "I knew it was only a matter of time before something happened."

"Yeah you two weren't exactly all that subtle you know," Kendall piped in. "When Binx told me how she felt I really wasn't surprised at all, although I was just a little thrown at your willingness to jump on the bandwagon, red."

"How could I not?" Marissa asked with a fond glance at the brunette on the bench, and both Kendall and Krystal raised their eyebrows. "I guess that I was the last one to see what was apparently just painfully obvious."

"Well maybe not _painfully_," Kendall goaded her gently with a grin. "Just – you know. Noticeable."

"Whichever."

"Whichever what?" came a much deeper voice from behind them, and Marissa's blood ran instantly icy as she recognized the rumbling tone. "What are we talking about over here?"

"_We're_ not talking about anything that concerns you JR, so just fuck off," Marissa said as she turned quickly around, Bianca instantly by her side again. "What are you doing here?"

"Is this not a public park?" he asked, finally coming to stop a few feet in front of the women. "I saw my son over there playing and I wanted to say hello. Is that a crime?"

"Nope," Marissa managed to reply through clenched teeth, "but if you go over there and scare him again I swear they're going to have to scrape your nads off the sidewalk."

Kendall chuckled from behind them and Marissa glanced back at her, noticing that she stood squarely behind her sister while Krystal stood behind Marissa's other shoulder and her heart swelled at their support. JR leered darkly at her before calling up another fake grin.

"Ladies could I possibly have a moment alone with my wife?" he asked casually, and Marissa literally saw red.

"I am not your wife JR," she fumed quietly at him. "Don't ever call me that again."

"Fine whatever. Can I have a moment with my _ex-_wife please?"

"No you can't," Bianca answered him as she stepped forward. "Whatever you've got to say you can say right here."

_Wow – she's incredibly sexy when she's pissed off,_ Marissa thought, but her attention was forced to return to JR as he openly sneered at her.

"Heh – you think you get to decide that? You can't stop me from…"

"Watch me," Bianca cut him off menacingly, taking another step forward and JR actually faltered somewhat.

"Easy there," he said as he raised his hands up. "I'm not here to start any trouble. I just need to talk to Marissa."

"Then talk," Marissa told him as she crossed her arms. "What do you want?"

JR glanced around at the surrounding women, apparently going over his options but quickly saw that he didn't really have any so he sighed and started talking. "I just wanted to apologize for what happened yesterday," he said, and the forced sincerity in his tone made Marissa's anger flare again but she bit her tongue. "I was just responding to you walking out on Friday and it was wrong. I'm sorry and I've gotten the master key from Bruce and you can get your things whenever you like. But I'd also like to ask you again to reconsider your decision. I know I can be difficult sometimes but I want to try to be better for you – for us. Please Marissa – you've got to give me another chance. We owe it to AJ and to the family that we should be. We belong together; you, me and AJ, just like we used to be. We were happy Marissa and I know we could be again if you'll just give me the chance to show you. Please."

"You know what JR, that was really great speech," Marissa replied flatly. "Did you practice that on the way over here or did you make it up on the spot?"

"This is just me Marissa," JR told her, his voice dropping to a pathetically low level as he trained his eyes to peer puppy dog-like at the redhead. "I'm just a man in love who's trying to set it right again."

"Well that's too bad because I'm not in love with you anymore and I haven't been ever since I found out about you and Annie. So it doesn't matter what you have to say now – it's over."

"Marissa you can't hold that over my head forever…" JR tried, but Marissa shook her head.

"Yeah JR, actually I can," she told him, her voice rising despite her best efforts to control it. "Because it only further proves the kind of man you really are, and like I told you yesterday that's not the kind of man I want in my life. In fact I don't want _any_ man in my life anymore, so just get the hell out of here before I get really upset."

"What do you mean you don't want any man?" he asked her. "What – you plan on staying celibate for the rest of your life? Come on Marissa, I didn't screw up that bad."

"Yeah you did, and no I'm not," Marissa responded evenly, her face flushing slightly at the small innuendo but she charged forward. "Look – the only thing that matters is that you and I are done JR. Just accept it and move on."

"I won't ever move on," he said, his voice dropping so low that the women could barely hear it and Marissa glanced beside her to Bianca, who rolled her eyes. "I want to make this work and I'll do whatever it takes. Look – I've got to go to Paris this evening to see about the new buildings there and I want you to come with me. It could be like a second honeymoon. I'll take time off and we can talk and reconnect…"

"Okay just stop JR!" Marissa boomed, and she turned quickly to make sure that none of the children had heard but they were too preoccupied playing tag to notice. "What don't you understand? Gaaaaah you are the most bull-headed man I have ever known in my life! Just get it through your thick skull – we are not going to happen ever again! I've moved on already – there is _no hope_ for you. It's done! Finished. Over with. Just leave me alone."

"You've moved on huh?" JR asked, stepping closer slowly as he glared at Marissa. "I don't believe that. I can tell that you're in love Marissa – I can see it in your eyes. So why don't _you_ just admit it and give me another chance?"

"I am in love JR, but it's not with you," Marissa told him as her voice dropped back to normal, seeing that she really had run out of ways to break through to him. "Does that help you? I'm in love with someone else so just let me go now. Please."

"You… you're in love with someone else…" JR repeated slowly, his eyes skating across her face as comprehension set in. After a moment he glanced sideways at Bianca who was wildly trying to level him with her gaze, and after a quick second Marissa saw recognition flash across his eyes and his head shot upward as he pointed madly between the two. "No man huh? Not going to stay celibate huh? In love with someone else?" he questioned, his voice a low rumble that shook with instant rage but Marissa felt Bianca's hand grasp hers firmly as she matched his step forward.

"Yes JR – I love Marissa," she told him forcefully as the two came practically nose-to-nose. "I love her more than you ever could have and I'm not ashamed to admit it. She deserves so much more than anything you've ever given her."

"Oh this is rich," JR said ominously, his square jaw tensing. "So you turned Marissa gay huh? You worked your little lesbian magic and got her to switch teams just because you hate me right?"

"See JR, this is just another one of your problems," Marissa interjected, stepping forward so she was shoulder-to-shoulder with her girlfriend and their hands tightened together. "You're turning something that is entirely about me into something about you, like it's some kind of attack or something. Well I've got news for you – this has _nothing_ to do with you. Bianca and I fell in love because we were always going to because we belong together, and it has nothing to do with what went wrong between you and me. _You_ messed it up JR, and not just once. So just suck it up and take responsibility and leave me alone. I'll never leave Bianca so just accept it."

"So you're like what – some kind of '_lesbian'_ now?" JR asked, throwing his hands up to air quote the word mockingly and Marissa stepped forward but Bianca pulled her back.

"Sure JR, call me whatever you like as long as it's not wife," she told him, and to her surprise she felt Krystal's hand on her shoulder as she and Kendall both stepped forward to stand behind them again.

"I think it's time for you to go now JR," Krystal said. "You've said your piece and now it's time for you to go."

JR shook his head and looked toward the playground. "I'm taking my son," he said as he stepped away, lumbering across the grass but all four women took off after him and cut him off.

"You can see him after you get back from Paris," Marissa told him, her heart pounding so hard that she could barely breathe. "He'll stay with…"

"He will _not_ stay with two lesbians," JR spit at her, his voice now a low growl that made Marissa swallow in fright but then her anger surged as what he'd said sank in.

"I'm sorry?" she asked, resisting the urge to slap him since they were so near to the playground. "Since when did you turn into a homophobe JR?"

"Since my ex-wife suddenly switched teams and is trying to confuse my son," JR replied, trying to step around Kendall but she and Bianca wouldn't allow him through. "Goddammit move out of my way or I'll move you myself!" he bellowed so loudly that people on the surrounding benches heard, and one quick glance over her shoulder showed her that AJ and the other kids had become privy to the situation and they all made their way hesitantly over.

"Good – AJ come on, we're going home now," JR commanded the blonde boy, doing absolutely nothing to hide his explosive anger which only made AJ melt against his mother's side. "AJ come on! We're going home right now!"

"No…" AJ replied quietly, snuggling closer to Marissa as Bianca stood firm behind his back with Gabby in her arms and Miranda by her side, who reached out a small hand to rest on AJ's shoulder. "I want to stay with mommy."

"Well too bad because she's not your mommy anymore," JR told him, to which all four women immediately started yelling.

"How dare you tell him that!" Krystal shrieked.

"Who the hell do you think you are JR?" Kendall asked as she set Ian down so that she could gesture angrily while Bianca clutched tighter to Gabby, needing to keep something to occupy her hands so she wouldn't begin beating the pulp out of the man.

"You take that back," she growled threateningly as Marissa stepped forward and tucked AJ securely behind her as she closed the remaining distance between them so she could stare him straight in the eye.

"You are officially at your lowest point JR," she told him, carefully filtering her words to exclude any that the children shouldn't hear. "And if you _ever_ say that to _my son_ again I swear – I will make good on my promise from earlier. Do not mess with me, and don't make the mistake of thinking that I'll back down. I am not afraid of you and AJ _is_ mine no matter what you think or try to do. You will _never_ take him away from me."

"No – I don't want to leave mommy," AJ's timid voice rang out from behind her and she turned to see heavy tears start tumbling from his eyes. "Why wouldn't you be my mommy anymore? You're my mommy."

"I know I am sweetie, and that will _never_ change," Marissa assured him as she knelt down and wrapped the boy in her arms. His tiny arms wound around her neck and wouldn't let go so she stood with the boy still in her arms as he peered nervously at his father who stood stone-still with an evil glint in his eyes.

"Did you tell him what kind of life you're setting up for him?" he asked after a moment, all the fake sorrow from before gone completely, replaced with only abundant amounts of steaming anger.

"Yes JR we did actually, and he's thrilled," Marissa supplied, matching every ounce of JR's malevolence. "All he sees is the happy family that we are, not the labels that you just tried to stick on me."

"You and Bianca?" AJ asked, and Marissa nodded as the boy turned to address his father. "Mommy and Bianca are really happy daddy. I thought you would be happy for them because mommy's – well – mommy and Bianca's your friend."

"It's not that simple AJ," JR responded through clenched teeth, and his tone made his son shrink back again.

"It should be that simple," AJ breathed quietly against Marissa's shoulder, but JR had finally had enough.

"Okay that's it," he said as he stepped toward Marissa, who stumbled back against Bianca, Krystal, Kendall and the kids as they all surged to form a perimeter around her as she stood there with AJ in her arms. "Move out of my way!" he roared again as he was forced to stop. "AJ – you're coming home with me. Right now!"

"No!" AJ shouted back. "I'll only go home with you when you quit yelling and being so mean to everybody all the time! I want to stay with mommy and Bianca – they never yell at me."

"AJ you have no idea what you're saying!" JR tried, but the look on his face showed that he was beginning to understand that his attempts would be futile. "Do you know what mommy is now? Do you understand what that's going to mean for you?"

"The only thing that mommy is is my mommy," AJ told him instantly, finally sliding out of Marissa's arms but not leaving her side as he faced his father, and Marissa's heart cracked in two at his love and his bravery.

JR stumbled at that, finally standing down as his shoulders slumped and he looked at the small crowd in front of him. He could see that he had not only scared his son but the other children as well, along with completely pissing off the four women they clung to. He blinked a few times and lowered his head, trying to get a grip on his seething anger. "Okay fine," he finally spoke quietly, refusing to look up again as he turned away. "I'll be back from Paris on Friday. We'll talk more then."

And with that he walked purposefully from the park back to his car, the group he left behind only breathing easy once he'd gotten inside and driven away.

/

"You okay honey?" Krystal asked Marissa about an hour later, the whole gang then seated at a large table back at the restaurant as the women attempted to cheer up the children with ice cream sundaes. Bianca and Kendall had them all laughing again as they told them silly stories while Marissa sat at the end of the table with her head on her hands, staring blankly into space as she stewed over JR.

She took a deep breath before responding. "I will be I think," she said. "The prospect of not having JR around for a few days is helping but the worrying about what he'll do once he gets back is not. I'm not sure I have the energy to fight him for my son."

"But you will if you have to," Krystal told her confidently, and the look on Marissa's face showed her that she knew she was right. "But hopefully it won't really come to that. AJ can see that there's nothing wrong with you or the path you've chosen and I think that will break through JR's thick head better than anything."

"That's true," Marissa agreed, "but I still don't want that kind of hatred modeled for him, and especially not from his father. I really thought JR was had more sense than that."

"I think he does for the most part, but once again that old Chandler anger got the better of him," Krystal replied, and Marissa cocked an eyebrow at her. "And no I'm not defending what he did today – that was just about as low as I've ever seen him go, telling AJ what he did. But you know JR. He said it without thinking about it because he was angry and the bottom line is that AJ does need that guy in his life, no matter how much you or I may hate him. The only thing you've got to focus on is this new wonderful relationship you're starting on now. You've got Bianca and your three beautiful kids and more than enough love to make up for what JR can't supply right now, so AJ's gonna be just fine. Trust me."

Marissa shook her head and couldn't help but smile at her mother. "You're really okay with all this? It's really that easy for you?"

"Marissa, even after what happened with JR today when we all came back here and everybody was so upset you _still_ kept grinning this goofy little grin every single time you looked at her," Krystal explained with a gentle squeeze to Marissa's wrist. "If she can make you that happy without really doing anything then I'd say that's someone you need to hold on to. So yes – it's really that easy."

"You're amazing," Marissa said as she leaned forward to hug her, and as they pulled apart Kendall scooted toward them.

"Sorry to interrupt here ladies but the kids just suggested a rousing game of kickball over in the park this afternoon and they want everybody to play," she said with a smile in the kids' direction. "You in?"

"I'm sorry but Grandma Krystal has to work, but I'll try to sneak over to cheer from the sidelines for a little while," Krystal replied, but Marissa smiled widely and got up to stand behind Bianca's chair, placing her hands on her shoulders.

"Well you can count me in," she said, to which all five kids shouted happily and took off for the door while Kendall marched after them trying to pull up Ian's baggy shorts. Bianca rose and snaked an arm around Marissa's waist as they headed to the door and Krystal called a farewell as she disappeared back to the kitchen.

"You okay?" Bianca asked quietly as they stepped outside, kissing Marissa's forehead as she laid her head on the taller woman's shoulder. Marissa smiled sincerely and watched their kids skip across the street, wrapping both arms around Bianca's waist as she looked up to peer into those amazing brown eyes that glowed so happily back to her. She leaned forward for a loving kiss and Bianca hummed appreciatively, both women knowing that they would deal with JR later – right then all that mattered was brightening their children again.

When Marissa pulled away shortly after she settled her head once again onto her shoulder as they crossed the street together, and she realized instantly that she was in fact "Just perfect," she told her girlfriend, her returned bright smile all she needed to see to know that it was the absolute truth.


	9. Perfect Perfection

**Yeah – I went there. I also oh-so-subtly changed the story's rating, so if you ain't at least 16 GTFO. Not that I have any delusions that that will stop anybody, but at least I said it…**

**But if you are at least 16 and feel obliged to indulge in a little adult lovely lesbian action, proceed. And feel free to skip past my ranting cuz momma's got a long one today.**

**First off – thanks for hanging with me.**

**Secondly – I really don't know the words to express my gratitude to every single person who has read this story and enjoyed it. On a slightly personal note this has come in a time that hasn't been the easiest for me and having this outlet has been the bright spot inside quite a few of my days. So my heartfelt thanks for the silent readers and my overwhelming appreciation of the just insanely kind things that the reviewers have said has spurred me on more than anything, and I poured everything I've got into this chapter just for you. Hope I didn't disappoint.**

**Third of all – this chapter was a BI-OTCH. It took me more than nine days to complete it, mainly because I had to get over my preteen-esque blushing at all the steamy goodness. I now have a deeper understanding and appreciation for romance writers because DAYUMM… this shit is hard. But the story dictated that I take it there, and **_**Miched8**_** your request did not go unnoticed. Just the last little push I needed to get it done, so thanks times a billion. Like lots.**

**Fourth – I still don't know whether this story is over. I think that maybe **_**this one**_** is, but I still couldn't find it in me to mark it as complete yet. I feel like I reached a nice stopping place but then I keep thinking that maybe it's more of a jumping off place with room for expansion. Or maybe (probably) a sequel. Just don't know, and I'll be forced to take the next three weeks to figure it out. Real life is back in the form of a 5000 mile road trip and while that will pretty much wipe out my writing time as well as my internet access it will also afford me lots of time to ponder on my Minx. Hopefully inspiration will strike and I'll return with a new or continuing story. Maybe both. I make no promises.**

**And fifthly (which I'm surprised is a word) – I do so so hope that this chapter does justice to the events it describes and that it is enjoyed just as much as the previous ones. I tried real real hard to leave you with the best I've got before I disappear for a hot minute.**

**K I'm done. If you read the rant gee thanks. If not – that's cool. The only thing that really matters is the story anyway.**

**Onward.**

_**Perfect Perfection**_

"Mawissa?" Gabby asked quietly with her head resting heavily on Marissa's shoulder as she carried her down the hallway at Wildwind, the young girl freshly bathed and about to pass out in Marissa's arms from the day's activities.

"Yes Gabby?"

"What would happen if Sleeping Booty fell in love with the pwince from Snow White?"

"I don't know baby – I don't think those two have ever met before."

Gabby yawned deeply and played with a loose strand of Marissa's hair as they entered the girl's room and Marissa made her way slowly over to the bed where she deposited the already half asleep toddler. "Well we could intwa… intwo… we could make them meet," she said through another yawn, and Marissa smiled warmly as she sat on the edge of the bed next to her and pulled the covers up to her chin.

"That's right Gabby, we could," Marissa agreed while Gabby snuggled down into the blankets and Marissa smoothed out her brown hair which was still warm from the blow dryer. "How do you think would be best to do that?"

Gabby shrugged against her pillow and fought with her eyes to keep them from fluttering shut. "Dunno… I just think they would make a pwetty couple."

"I think so too. What if I read you the story of Sleeping Beauty but we'll change the ending so instead of Prince Charming coming to rescue her it will be the prince from Snow White."

"Okay," Gabby said as eagerly as could be allowed as she continued to fight the losing battle with her eyelids.

Marissa got up and crossed the room to the bookshelf and quickly selected the book, but by the time she turned around Gabby's shallow snores could be heard and the redhead chuckled as she put the book back. She crossed back to the bed and bent down to kiss Gabby's forehead and the girl smiled in her sleep as she squeezed the comforter against her face, the effect causing her cheeks to pudge out in little balls and Marissa's heart warmed instantly at the sight.

_She is so amazing,_ she thought, once again brushing out her hair that was splayed above her head across the pillow. _And she looks just like her mother. We're in for a lifetime of trouble with her when she gets old enough to be noticed by boys… or girls I guess…_

After a longer time than Marissa realized she finally picked herself up off the bed and went to the door, careful to check that Gabby's Little Mermaid nightlight was still on next to the dresser before she inched the door closed behind her. The brightness of the hallway outside made her blink rapidly for a few seconds as she adjusted, and as she stood there she heard small voices coming from the room next door. Silently she approached Miranda's door which stood slightly ajar, and from the room beyond she heard AJ speaking.

"But if I take the room across the hall then we'll all be here close together in case someone gets scared," he was saying, and Marissa smiled as she recalled the conversation on the car ride home from the park which had centered around AJ needing his own room at Wildwind if he was going to be staying with them more.

"Are you sure buddy?" Bianca asked, and as Marissa inched forward to peek inside she saw AJ's chin resting on the bars on the top bunk of Miranda's bed while Bianca sat below him with Miranda sitting cross-legged next to her on the mattress in her pink polka dot pajamas. "Because the room on the other side of Caleb's is a lot bigger."

"I know but I don't want to be that far away," AJ replied. "If I'm down at this end then I'll be more like part of the family since you're all down here together."

Bianca reached a hand upward and patted AJ's dangling arm. "You are a part of the family buddy, no matter where your room is. But I would love for you to be down here with us if you want to be. And I know your mom will love it too."

"Me too!" Miranda chimed in, leaning over sideways until she almost fell off the bed to look up at AJ and Bianca had to lurch forward to catch her shoulder before she toppled over. "AJ it's going to be so cool having you around!"

"I know I can't wait to bring some of my toys over here so we can have them too," AJ replied enthusiastically, and both children cheerfully launched into deep conversation about which ones he should make sure to bring along with him every time while Bianca sat forward and rested her elbows on her knees and her chin on her hands, her eyes darting up and down between the two as she tried to look interested in what they were saying. Marissa grinned from her place outside the door as she gazed at her girlfriend and she leaned against the doorframe, trying to keep up with what the kids were saying but unable to hear them after a minute or two of staring at Bianca.

_This is heaven,_ she thought blissfully, the chipper chatter of the children only beautiful background noise to the glorious picture of Bianca sitting there listening to them. _I can't believe I've been missing out on this for so long. If I could have seen just how incredible this was going to be maybe it wouldn't have taken me so long to do something about it. I really hate that we've missed out on time now – if I'd just gotten my head around it earlier or gotten a backbone sooner then it could have been this way for so long now._

_Oh but right – I promised Bianca to quit beating myself up for that. But I can't help it… I feel like I have to make up for lost time. I realize that we've moved fast this weekend – telling the kids and them automatically turning us into one big happy family may have been a little reckless, I have to admit. But with Bianca it's really not – I feel like we can't move fast enough now. It's all just so easy and makes so much sense. Good god I must have been completely and utterly blind to have skipped over it as long as I did…_

_But I'm not blind now – no I'm most certainly not,_ Marissa thought which cheered her even further as Bianca began attempting to wind down the kids' conversation so they could go to sleep.

"Okay guys – this is exactly why we decided not to sleep in the fort again tonight," she told them as forcefully as she could, but Marissa noted the severe lack of sternness in her voice as both kids continued to slip in their last remarks around her. After a few futile seconds she stood up and put her hands on her hips and Marissa was treated to a delightful view of her backside as she bent over toward Miranda.

Marissa cleared her throat quietly as her eyes widened to the size of hockey pucks, her stomach doing lustful somersaults as she stood there unwilling to blink and she completely missed whatever Bianca was saying to the kids over the loud rushing inside her eardrums. _Uh – damn,_ she thought dreamily, memorizing the way that Bianca's jeans gently hugged her hips and when she straightened back up again to address AJ Marissa bit her lip as her shirt caught above her belt, briefly revealing the smooth ivory skin of her lower back and the redhead swallowed hard. _Okay yeah – I'm _definitely_ gay for Bianca. Because I mean… damn._

"Can we move the Wii into the fort and play it in there after school tomorrow?" Miranda was asking as Bianca basically forced her to lie back against her pillow.

"Yeah that would be so fun!" AJ agreed as he sat up again, but he immediately plopped back down as Bianca rose to glare playfully at him.

"You two are a real tag-team aren't you?" Bianca asked with a raised eyebrow, and both children grinned mischievously at her and Bianca nodded as she chuckled lightly. "Alright – you can move the Wii in there but only after you've both finished your homework. Deal?"

"Deal!" they replied in unison and AJ's hand dropped swiftly through the bars to high five Miranda.

"Okay but now you've got to go to sleep – it's already an hour past your normal bedtime and you should both be exhausted after the weekend you've had."

And Marissa could see that the two seven-year-olds were in fact just as tired as Gabby had been only they were a bit more skilled at disguising and ignoring it. Miranda sank down happily into her plush comforter as Bianca resumed her place on the side of the mattress to give the girl a good night kiss.

"Night mommy," Miranda's muffled voice said as Bianca's hair fell over her face when she bent down to hug her, but the girl didn't seem to mind at all as she enveloped her mother's neck tightly in her arms.

"Goodnight Mimo," Bianca breathed happily. "I love you."

"I love you too mommy, more than anything. And thank you so much for this awesome weekend. It was so much fun."

"Yeah thanks Bianca, it was a blast," AJ replied and Bianca's eyes lifted to stare at the bottom of his mattress.

Bianca released her daughter and kissed her forehead before rising to address AJ, but instead of leaning over the side rails she walked to the end of the bed and climbed the first two steps so that she could see the boy properly, whose upside down head was then just below hers. "I'm glad you had fun buddy," she told him as she kissed his forehead as well, and Marissa had to clutch her chest as a fiery flood of emotion ripped through it at his joyful smile up at the brunette.

"I did – even after daddy came and made everybody upset. Do you think he's okay?"

"Yeah AJ, your dad is just fine I think," Bianca assured him, the boy's attitude obviously much better after his long conversation with both she and Marissa as soon as they'd returned to Wildwind.

"Good, because even though he was really mean today I don't want him to be sad," AJ responded quietly.

Bianca brushed the hair from his forehead and smiled reassuringly down at him. "Your dad loves you AJ, remember? And while he's away being upset you've always got us – your mom and me and Mimo and Gabby. We all love you so so so so much."

"And I love you," AJ sighed as he rolled over toward the wall. "Thanks Bianca – you're really awesome."

"_You're_ really awesome buddy," Bianca whispered as she bent to kiss his temple. "And I'm so glad you and your mommy are here with us."

"Me too," the boy replied through a yawn. "I'm glad you and mommy started loving each other so we get to be a family. I like our family."

"So do I buddy," Bianca told him breathlessly. "I love our family."

"Night Bianca. Love you," were AJ's last words before sleep took him, and one quick glance down at Miranda showed that she had beat him there. Bianca hopped down gently from the railing and tiptoed quietly across the carpet, finally spotting Marissa in the hallway watching her and the two exchanged matching bright smiles as the brunette approached and eased the door silently shut. As soon as she was safely outside Marissa wrapped her tightly in her arms, resting her head comfortably on the taller woman's shoulder and sighed happily as Bianca placed a tender kiss on the top of her hair.

"You okay?" she asked the redhead after a moment, to which Marissa nodded and sighed contentedly again, her warm breath playing across the exposed skin of Bianca's collarbone and she shivered.

"I'm absolutely perfect," Marissa told her, burying her face deeper against Bianca's neck as she left gentle kisses there. "This whole weekend has been like something out of a fairy tale. I don't want it to be over."

"Me neither," Bianca agreed, holding her girlfriend closer as she tried to ignore the muddling cloud that had taken hold of her brain ever since Marissa's lips had connected with the sensitive skin of her neck. "We'll definitely have to have a repeat soon."

"Agreed," Marissa whispered gruffly as she began trailing her mouth up to the back of Bianca's ear and she felt the brunette shudder. Her hands roamed up the delicate curve of Bianca's back as she finally pulled away slightly so that she could look into those swirling chocolate eyes. "I love you," she breathed, her heart rate zooming off at the twitching smile with which she was rewarded.

"I love you," Bianca replied, her voice gravelly in her throat as she continued to fight the torrent of emotions that threatened to explode from her chest as she lost herself in those honey eyes she loved so much.

Marissa's lips found hers then, each woman instinctively clutching the other closer as they eagerly explored what was swiftly becoming familiar territory. Much to Bianca's pleasure Marissa's probing tongue soon begged for entrance which she willingly granted as she was backed gently against the wall, unable to stop the low moan at the intoxicating feeling of Marissa's hands on her back as they slid slowly down to her waist.

_Good god what is she doing to me?_ Bianca thought foggily as the redhead's addictive lips finally left hers and began a deliberate path across her jawline, one hand reaching up to cup her cheek and Bianca impulsively leaned against its gentle heat, placing a delicate kiss inside Marissa's exposed palm. _I'm going to have to stop this soon or else I won't be able to…_

But Marissa evidently had different plans as her other hand lifted from Bianca's waist and tucked itself adroitly beneath her shirt, her scorching fingertips leaving a lingering trail of goosebumps as they slid gently across the brunette's taut stomach and she gasped loudly, the sound swallowed instantly by Marissa's mouth as she crashed it hungrily against Bianca's and it took literally every ounce of her remaining willpower to reach down and grasp Marissa's wrist, pushing the redhead away from her gently as she swallowed hard to collect herself. "We have to stop Riss," she breathed finally, barely able to communicate at all as she stared into the darkening pools of her girlfriend's eyes.

Marissa leaned in, rubbing her nose smoothly against Bianca's as she offered her a wry grin. "Why?" she asked, the husk in her voice nearly buckling the brunette's knees.

"Be – because," Bianca began, barely able to keep her remaining thoughts intact as Marissa closed the distance again and kissed her lips tenderly but Bianca somehow managed to press forward. "If we don't stop now then…"

"Then let's don't stop," Marissa told her evenly, her low voice almost like a growl and Bianca felt another chill tumble down her back all the way into her toes as she stared completely shocked into the redhead's smiling confident eyes. She nuzzled their noses together again, this time accompanying it with a seductive sigh that made Bianca's head swim insanely. "I won't stop as long as you don't stop me," she whispered into the brunette's ear, running her fingers through her silky curls. "I don't want to stop."

"You…" Bianca tried, but her heart had started pumping so fast that she was positive Marissa could feel it as she was pressed so firmly against her, unable to speak over the pounding inside her eardrums. _Is she really ready for this? It's only been two days. Is it too fast? Will it possibly scare her…?_

But Marissa's sultry voice broke through her erratically logical questioning. "I'm ready Bianca," she told her breathily, cupping her face once again inside her blazing palms and the brunette inhaled sharply as the other woman held her gaze and smiled warmly. "I've never been more positive of anything in my life," she whispered, pecking Bianca's lips as she continued. "If I thought I loved you on Friday that's nothing to what I'm feeling now. Seeing our kids together, spending this weekend as the family that we should be – it's the best dream I could have ever imagined. I've fallen more deeply in love with you every single second and I don't want to waste any more of them – I want you," she breathed against Bianca's ear, inhaling the brunette's overwhelmingly heady scent and she closed her eyes, memorizing every detail of the woman in her arms as she went on. "I want you now – I want you always," she finished, her voice almost lost over the eruption of desire in her throat and she placed her lips firmly against Bianca's cheek and didn't move.

_Oh my good god I'm done for,_ Bianca thought languidly as she turned toward the redhead, her hooded eyes sparkling so incredibly at her that she momentarily forgot about everything. The sprawling mansion of Wildwind disappeared from her mind as it became incapable of settling on anything but her love's magical gaze; the sleeping children in the room behind her, Asher's rumbling snores from his suite down the hall, the gentle buzzing of the overhead lights that cast long shadows down Marissa's flawless form – all were lost completely in that moment as the two stood simply gazing at one another, the boundless tunnels of the other's eyes momentarily overpowering them both.

_This is exactly where I'm supposed to be_, Marissa thought blissfully, pulling a hand from Bianca's waist to brush brown curls tenderly from her silently beaming face and she leaned in again, seizing her sensuous lips as they both smiled widely into the kiss, Bianca then taking the opportunity to push them both away from the wall and turn them around. They began a slow march in the opposite direction, each reluctant to break away from the other as their feet worked in unison to lead them back to Bianca's bedroom, their hands only leaving the other's slender body to glide against the wall to guide them as neither had their eyes open widely enough to see anything.

When they reached the cracked bedroom door Bianca nudged it open with her foot and the two staggered inside, Marissa breaking away only long enough to hook her heel around the door and kick it closed again, her mouth instantly returning to Bianca's waiting lips as they continued farther into the room. The two spun slowly around until Marissa was walking backward, Bianca's hands planted firmly on her waist as she led them toward the bed and when Marissa's calves pressed against it she sat down gingerly and Bianca's lips finally left hers as she knelt between her legs and slid her hands down to the tops of her thighs. The redhead took a deep breath as her girlfriend peered lovingly up at her.

Bianca moved forward and pressed her cheek against Marissa's, inhaling deeply as her red hair fell across her face and she slid her hands upward, gliding them delicately across Marissa's hips and around to her back as she squeezed her gently closer. Marissa's hands found their way into Bianca's hair, her face now level with her own as she sat on the edge of the bed with the brunette kneeling in front of her. She pulled her face to the right slightly until her forehead rested softly against Bianca's, kissing the tip of her nose. "You won't stop me?" she asked hoarsely, her eyes and voice now completely unguarded.

Bianca shook her head deliberately. "No, I won't stop you," she whispered, keeping her eyes peeled as she leaned forward and stole a lingering kiss. "I can't stop you Marissa," she breathed as she pulled away again, and Marissa's heart threatened to beat itself out of her chest at her words.

"Show me," she requested breathlessly as she slid both hands slowly from Bianca's neck down across her arms, hooking them inward and gliding them underneath her shirt again and she delighted in the short gasp her touch caused and felt another explosion of desire as her girlfriend's already tense abdominals tightened more rigidly beneath her fingers. As she recovered Marissa watched the last threads of her reluctance melt away, her brown eyes darkening instantly with a blistering hunger that ignited the lower half of Marissa's body, every nerve ending now screaming for the brunette.

_Oh my god – I _need_ her,_ Marissa thought vehemently as she crushed her lips against Bianca's, gripping her hair tightly inside her palms prompting a throaty moan from her lover. _I've never needed someone so badly in my life… I need her to be closer to me… Now…_

_Take it easy here,_ Bianca forced a scattered thought through the sensual bliss of Marissa's kiss, fighting through the dreamy euphoria of her fiery tongue in her mouth as it traced slow circles around her own. _This is really happening… this is really happening… Take it slow for her. Make sure she's comfortable… don't rush. This is really happening…_

Marissa's hands crawled upward across her stomach, gliding carefully along her sides as her fingers carried the bottom of her shirt with them and Bianca instinctively raised her arms; Marissa pulled back just long enough to lift the shirt over her head and hummed with pleasure as Bianca's silky hair cascaded down around them, the coconut scent of her shampoo slamming Marissa's senses into overdrive. She tossed the shirt aside and reached down to remove her own, the brunette's nimble fingers already there and soon her top joined Bianca's across the room but instead of coming back in for another kiss Bianca sat back slightly, reaching behind her as she slid off both of her shoes without breaking eye contact with the redhead.

Marissa tried frantically to control her breathing as Bianca's hands came to rest on her knees, gliding down the length of her calves, her palms leaving a sweltering trail of heat as they moved painfully slowly down to her ankles. The brunette looked down and leisurely slipped the shoes from her feet, Marissa only barely suppressing her gasp as her lover's scorching palms hooked around the backs of her heels. _Holy shit get a grip,_ she thought torpidly, placing her hands gently on Bianca's downward turned head. _She's only taking your shoes off… calm the hell down – we're just getting started._

But that rational side of Marissa' psyche could no longer comprehend the seemingly mundane action of the brunette removing her shoes, instead allowing it to very nearly overwhelm her due largely to what it was leading toward and she forced her own hands down through Bianca's hair and to her chin, lifting her gorgeous face back up to meet her own and their mouths collided again as Marissa reclined backward, the brunette following earnestly as she came to rest on top of her, their bare stomachs pressing firmly against one another. Slowly they began a lazy crawl up to the top of the bed, their intent on prolonged sensory kisses keeping them from reaching their destination very quickly. As Marissa's head finally came to rest on a pillow Bianca's hand snaked around her back and deftly unhooked her bra, tracing the line of a strap across her shoulder with her index finger as she pulled the fabric from her chest and Marissa swallowed hard as Bianca's lithe fingers pulled the garment from her body and tossed it aside, unable to suppress her smile at the brunette's awed expression as she took in her exposed breasts for the first time.

Marissa surged forward and reclaimed Bianca's slightly open mouth, sliding her tongue inside easily as she reached around her girlfriend's back, suddenly overcome with the need to rid them both of their remaining clothing. Her fingers found the clasp of Bianca's bra and to her great surprise she managed to get the first hook undone without problem but her fingers stumbled slightly over the second. Bianca made a move to pull away to help her but Marissa was having none of it; with her free hand she pulled Bianca's face back and mashed their lips together again as she continued to work on the last hook and after only a few seconds she felt it pull free. She couldn't help but hurry to tug the thing from her chest and throw it away, the feeling of Bianca's bare chest against her own eliciting a deep moan that was echoed by the brunette as she sank down on top of her again.

Marissa could feel the pooling heat between her legs as one of Bianca's thighs pressed against her and had she not been so preoccupied with her gloriously velvety yet firm lips she might have grunted in frustration, both pairs of tight denim jeans only escalating the problem, the friction between them not nearly strong enough to satiate either woman. Bianca of course noticed this and fought with herself to ignore her own growing discomfort at the feeling, still fully intent on making the whole experience about Marissa and her needs; or more specifically not rushing her into anything.

But to Bianca's surprise Marissa's hands slid across her backside and her fingers hooked over the tops of her pants and tugged forcefully at her belt buckle as soon as they reached it, the tinkling of the metal pulling Bianca out of the deep trance she had been in and as the redhead's fingers pulled the belt apart and reached for the buttons below Bianca managed to force a hand down to lightly clench her wrist, lifting herself up somewhat to stare at the woman beneath her whose eyes met hers with a hint of confusion mixed with exasperation.

Bianca smiled and swallowed hard to tame her mounting nerves at what she planned on doing next, resolving herself once again to move as slowly as she could manage so that Marissa could stop her at any point. She released the woman's hand and allowed her own to drift down to Marissa's jeans instead, and she unfastened the two buttons as she lowered her head and began a slow, sensual trail of licks and kisses along her neckline and down her chest, pausing briefly in the crevice between her resplendently pert breasts to pay special attention to both as her hands worked blindly to glide her pants down her legs. Marissa's eyes rolled into the back of her head and she moaned stridently as Bianca's mouth clamped around a hardened nipple, her hands clutching her hair so tightly that she worried she might hurt her but she couldn't let go. Her breath started to hitch and she gasped lightly with every lungful and when Bianca pulled her mouth away and breathed heavily over the moistened skin she couldn't stop the grating grunt that rocked around the back of her throat.

Bianca continued downward again and Marissa eased her grip inside her hair as the silky strands slid a long tickling trail across her chest and stomach, and when she felt Bianca's hands gliding along the skin of her legs as she forced her jeans down she found herself holding her breath, suddenly lying there in nothing but her thin silk underwear. She lifted her head and saw Bianca sitting up at the foot of the bed and she heard the soft _thwomp_ as her jeans hit the floor behind her, Bianca's eyes floating up and down Marissa's body so she sat up properly and reached out to her, the brunette crawling forward slowly until Marissa's hands could clasp around her neck. Marissa kissed her deeply as her hands found their way to Bianca's jeans and this time she didn't allow her enough time to stop her before she yanked the buttons open and unzipped them. Bianca helped by rolling forward so Marissa could slide the jeans past her knees but was spared doing any more as the brunette's legs wildly kicked them off and they too went crashing to the floor as the women sank back together again.

As Bianca came to lie once again atop her girlfriend Marissa's hand gripped a breast and kneaded it gently between her fingers, both women groaning into the other's mouth for long seconds. _Well this is a new feeling…_ Marissa thought foggily, the words not really catching in her consciousness since she was so completely wrapped up in feeling Bianca everywhere. _Perfect though… wonderful. Intense and amazing. _And thousands more descriptive words that Marissa couldn't think of.

_MARISSA, _was the single word flying around inside Bianca's brain in that moment, far too caught up with expelling every ounce of bottled passion she'd kept carefully hidden for so many months to bother her mind with words. She wanted to stay there with Marissa's hands on her for hours but her bubbling desire to be closer to the woman had begun to boil over so she once again forced their mouths apart and licked a swift trail down her neck and Marissa groaned softly as they parted. Bianca tried to skip over her breasts to more quickly reach her destination but was utterly unable to, losing herself for much longer than planned to ravishing them as Marissa's head lolled across the pillow and her eyes disappeared into the back of her head.

"Oh… my….. god…" she managed to croak, and when Bianca's right hand left its place on her stomach and slid downward she felt the skin below flash instantly cold, the sweltering heat of her hand slinking across her pelvis to tug at the top of her panties. Bianca's head finally followed as she kissed every inch of Marissa's tightened stomach, steadily yet painstakingly slowly pulling the silk fabric downward as her mouth and tongue followed. Marissa's hips rose off the bed, urging Bianca to just eliminate the garment which the brunette was happy to do, her nostrils flaring wide at the pungent aroma of her lover's arousal wafting up to her and as her eyes fell across the smoothened glistening skin below she sucked in a near painful lungful of air and swallowed so hard she felt her head swim. She glanced upward and saw that Marissa's head had risen to watch her, her eyes so dark with lust that they looked nearly black and in spite of the ample amount of effort it took for Bianca to keep herself from pummeling forward she hesitated, two pairs of darkened eyes meeting one another.

_Is this okay?_ Bianca silently asked, to which the corners of Marissa's mouth twitched into a smile as she swallowed and took a deep breath.

"Please Bee…" she rasped so quietly that Bianca almost missed it, the tingling fire between her legs becoming nearly impossible to bear and to her great pleasure Bianca immediately moved forward again.

Still intent on drawing it out, now a little less worried about rushing Marissa but wanting to savor every prolonged second that she could, Bianca resisted the prize at first and instead rubbed the underside of Marissa's toned thighs with her palms as she began just above the knee and very gently kissed her way upward along the hyper-sensitive skin. Marissa's head crashed with a loud _thwomp_ against the pillow again as she found herself to be completely out of control of her breathing, her toes curling against the duvet as she forced herself not to scream out in lustful frustration at the pounding between her legs as Bianca inched torturously closer. But after more seconds than Marissa could bear her hands wound into Bianca's hair and gently pulled. "Please Bee…. please," was all she could manage as both women finally lost their ability to tame their actions.

Bianca inhaled deeply through her nose as her mouth finally connected with Marissa's outer folds and a noise erupted from her throat somewhere between a grunt a blissful whine as her tongue slid inside her lover's slick heat while Marissa's head snapped backward so violently that her neck popped and her eyes squeezed tightly shut. Her feet lifted from the bed for a moment and her toes curled under while her hands clutched wildly inside Bianca's cascading hair, her breath now so impossibly erratic that she had to keep her mouth opened wide to avoid passing out from lack of oxygen.

Bianca's tongue worked in slow circles at first, skillfully sliding over all the places that made Marissa groan acutely as she eagerly drank in her briny sweetness while her arms hooked around her thighs and massaged the velvety smooth skin of her pelvis, the combined scent and flavor of her lover very nearly enough to make her come undone herself, only able to ignore the dull pain of her own strained arousal by focusing on the euphoria of what she was doing to Marissa. She was careful to breathe through her mouth mostly, knowing the hot/cold effect this created which apparently was causing Marissa to unravel incredibly quickly; her back arched upward and Bianca slid her hands beneath her as the redhead rested on her elbows, watching Bianca's work with madly fluttering eyes as she fought with her body to hold out as long as she could. But she knew after a small number of seconds that she simply couldn't stand it much longer, the combined ecstasy of Bianca's deft and blissfully thorough tongue, her hands firmly gripping her hips and of course the fact that it was Bianca there making love to her making Marissa positive that she was not in any kind of control of her reactions.

And once Bianca's entire mouth slid smoothly between her soaked folds Marissa was completely done for, the brunette's plump lips fastening securely to the hub of her lover's arousal and the redhead's eyes rolled until she saw stars, her scream caught inside her throat as all the blood rushed into her face and she literally stopped breathing, her orgasm shaking through her so jarringly that every muscle in her body tensed to the point of strain and she curled around Bianca's head, her hands fixed inside her hair and her thighs draped over her shoulders, pressing the woman more firmly against her as wave after wave of blind ecstasy exploded inside her.

And still Bianca didn't cease her work, pulling away from the most sensitive point to focus on other areas, all the while emitting a constant low hum which vibrated gently against Marissa's sensitized skin and mere seconds after the first one had hit her she felt another explode to take its place, riding its waves over the already pleasure-abused paths around her body. She convulsed violently with each contraction, curling into a tight ball around Bianca's head as her throat began to ache from her heavy breathing while Bianca cleaned up after herself, relishing the intoxicating taste of her lover.

After a moment Bianca felt all of Marissa's muscles go limp and she glanced up, her gorgeous face hidden from view by her heaving breasts and the brunette finally moved upward again, sliding her own body over every inch of Marissa's as she left a smooth trail of kisses all the way up. She came to rest beside her and wound her loose body inside her arms, kissing and sucking gently on the exposed skin of her neck as she waited for her to recover. After a minute the redhead slowly opened her eyes, her breathing a bit more even as she turned her head toward Bianca and immediately seized her mouth for a slow sensual kiss and Marissa couldn't believe it when she felt her midsection ignite again at the overwhelming sensation of tasting herself inside her lover's glorious mouth. She moaned into it and rolled over so she could lie on top of the brunette, her tongue exploring more thoroughly than before as her hands pushed Bianca's up above her head and she linked their fingers together. A leg slipped between Bianca's and she felt the scorching heat against her thigh, immediately pulling away as she was overcome with desire to taste her as well.

Her hands slid a swift path down to Bianca's hips and she dipped her fingers under the fabric of her underwear to push it down, sitting upright only long enough to roll Bianca's hips up and yank them from her body. She surged forward to meet her lover's lips as she rose off the bed, the two falling back together as Marissa's left hand connected with the smooth folds between Bianca's legs, slipping her index finger into her silky wetness and the brunette gasped loudly against Marissa's mouth as her breathing became instantly ragged. Marissa moved her attention to Bianca's stretched neck and quickly made her way down to her breasts, all the while gliding her fingers in a repeating line against her girlfriend's soaked center which was causing her to buck lightly beneath her but the redhead was careful not to push her too far too soon while she focused her mouth on her supple breasts. But it wasn't long before Bianca literally couldn't stand it anymore and she started to groan lasciviously, broken words tumbling from her mouth as her hands gripped tightly to Marissa's shoulders.

"Ma… Marissa… now…. please Riss…."

And Marissa was obliged to fulfill the request so she crawled quickly downward and lifted her glistening hand away, not a second wasted before she crashed her open mouth inside the steaming folds. A raucous hum tumbled from her as she eagerly began exploring this new terrain while Bianca's mouth clamped closed violently and she bit her tongue, the stinging pain numbed completely at the incredible ecstasy of Marissa's movements. And despite it being her first time the redhead was handling it like a pro, her tongue sliding repeatedly along the entire length of Bianca's core, careful to avoid too much attention on her throbbing nub to prolong the experience as long as she could for both women's benefit but she quickly felt that Bianca wouldn't last as long as she wanted so she clamped down onto it, swirling her tongue in rapid circles until her lover's hips jolted from the bed and she cried out with a throaty scream that she feared might wake the kids. But the thought quickly fell from her mind as the brunette quieted herself, breathing so heavily that her stomach sucked inward below her ribcage and Marissa slid her hands up to massage her breasts as she eagerly drank in the sweet juices that poured from her lover.

When there was none left she started upward, kissing the length of Bianca's stomach and chest until she reached her neck before settling contentedly below her chin, resting her head lightly on her collarbone to allow the brunette time to catch her breath. As she waited her fingers traced shallow lines across Bianca's heaving breasts and she sighed deeply, committing every detail of the moment to her memory; Bianca's buoyant hitching breaths, the rattling up and down of her chest beneath her cheek, the buzzing satisfied yet ever-hungry heat that filled her midsection, the dim glow of the streaking moon through the window curtains, and of course the overwhelming and unsurprising ease in her own chest at what had just transpired, blindingly clear in that instant that she had never experienced anything so unbelievably magnificent before.

But quite soon she felt Bianca begin to move again and she lifted her head to find that the brunette was gazing at her, her darkened brown eyes glowing with so much awe and love that Marissa felt it in the furthest corners of her heart and she found herself utterly incapable of looking away or even moving, the two women trapped there for silent minutes that skated past them without their knowing, each perfectly content to simply lie there wrapped completely inside the other as they travelled along those boundless tunnels together. Both sets of eyes shimmered with tears that never fell as their mouths hooked into faint smiles and their breathing synced together, Marissa's in, Bianca's out, Marissa's out, Bianca's in.

After a while Bianca leaned forward and gently kissed Marissa's nose and the redhead closed her eyes as her lover's mouth found hers, their kisses now languorous and deliberate as Bianca slowly rolled on top of her. Marissa's hands clung lightly to the back of her head as they held her hair back, but when Bianca's pelvis rubbed against her still dimly aching center she felt the heat rising between them once more and she responded in kind; her hips rose slightly off the bed as Bianca's dipped downward and she lifted a leg over Marissa's to position them. Their eyes locked and remained open as both Bianca's mouth and hips descended, each making contact with Marissa at the same moment and they both gasped against the other as their tongues and centers collided. Both women's eyes sank shut as they melted into one another and Bianca set a steady rhythm as she guided herself against Marissa, both moaning into the other's mouth while their essences combined together, the blistering heat of it very quickly bringing both very close to the edge.

Bianca came chanting Marissa's name a mere half a second before her lover, who was sent tumbling over the edge by more molten fluid erupting from the brunette into her own, the combined heat from the both of them causing their shared orgasm to carry on twice as long as before as neither woman quit moving against the other and it was a full minute before they both collapsed gasping onto the bed. Marissa wrapped her arms and legs as tightly around Bianca as her exhausted muscles would allow as their breathing found a slow tempo again, and as they wound down inside a drained peaceful silence Marissa could have sworn that she felt Bianca's heart rate slow at the same pace as her own until they were beating in unison, the steady _pa-dump pa-dump pa-dump_ so close to one another that they could both easily count them in their head.

After a short while Bianca moved to lift herself off the redhead but she held her tight, letting out a quiet "Nooo…" as her arms gripped more firmly around her shoulders so the brunette willingly sank back down again, this time with her head on Marissa's shoulder so that she could look at her. She twined a finger through her frazzled red hair as they smiled silently at one another, both desperately searching for the right words to say but they quickly realized that they just didn't exist – the only way to understand what had just happened was to just lie there together, their bodies touching from toes to forehead as they memorized every last line of the other's irises and the speckled light that danced across them.

/

Bianca awoke a few hours later in the exact same position in which she had fallen asleep. After lying there silently for a while both women had started to nod off and so she had finally rolled off of Marissa and draped a blanket over them, both falling almost instantly into a peaceful slumber with their bodies wrapped tightly together. Bianca opened her eyes slowly and sighed blissfully, the picture before her the most beautiful she had ever seen as Marissa's eyes fluttered beneath their lids in a dream, the shadowy darkness of her bedroom outlining her gorgeous features delicately and she leaned forward to plant a subtle kiss on her cheek. But before she pulled back she thought better of it, her promise from the previous morning coming to mind so she moved back in, this time placing her lips tenderly against Marissa's slightly open mouth, moving as slowly against them as she could allow. It wasn't long before the redhead responded, her hands automatically gliding up her back to cup her face as she kissed her fully back. But fairly quickly Bianca felt her hands gently push her face away so they could gaze at one another again, and as Bianca opened her mouth to speak a warm finger brushed across her lips to silence her.

She clamped her mouth shut and saw hazel eyes blacken once more, Marissa's hips rolling toward her again and she immediately felt the fire erupt inside her torso so she swooped forward, this time claiming her lover's lips for a kiss filled with passion and escalating desire as the redhead pulled her fully on top of her. Bianca felt Marissa's instant arousal against her stomach which only intensified her own so she quickly positioned herself again and soon the two were rubbing their thighs heatedly between the other's legs but this time the effect didn't seem to cut it; Bianca's head lifted just enough for their foreheads to rest together as their eyes found each other, their increasing rhythm doing nothing to disrupt their unblinking gaze. Marissa's hands travelled down Bianca's back, not stopping until they clenched tightly to her butt as she worked to pull her closer but still it couldn't satiate them so Bianca impulsively propped herself on her left arm so that her right hand could force itself between them.

She lifted her hips up for a flashing instant in which her hand immediately slid down to Marissa's soaked center, her fingers sliding easily into the outer folds and the redhead moaned vociferously but before Bianca's fingers could go further she felt a hand clasp around her wrist to stop her. Their rhythm slowed momentarily as she gazed down at her lover who was biting her lip, the hand that held her finally letting go and settling itself over her own scorching folds. She nodded once and smiled hungrily up into dark chocolate eyes, her fingers moving to search out her prize as Bianca's followed suit, both only barely able to keep their eyes open as they each slid two fingers easily inside the other. Each tried to gasp but was incapable of finishing as flooding euphoria washed over them both, and it took Bianca a few seconds to recover enough to resume their pace.

They started slowly at first, the backs of their palms finally coming to rest against one another and Bianca was then able to press their hips more firmly with each thrust without straining their arms, their fingers pushing deeper inside as their open palms massaged the area above. Both could feel the other beginning to tighten and so Bianca pulled back a little, wanting to drag this part out as long as possible due to the fantastic ecstasy both were experiencing at the sensation. She sat backward slowly and Marissa followed by sitting up, repositioning their legs around them so as not to disrupt their blissful contact until Bianca's legs were wrapped tightly around Marissa's hips with hers doing to same, each using their calves to pull the other's hips closer and their mouths collided as their free hands snaked into one another's hair.

And their rhythm continued. Steady push, pull, up, down; in, out, in, out, up, down. It continued this way for longer than they could really bear but neither could bear to stop it, and by the time they finally allowed themselves to unravel inside the other they had both run out of air, energy and control as their entire bodies exploded from their cores outward, their foreheads knocking together but the pain could not be felt and instead the two women just stared unblinking into the other's eyes as their fingers felt the powerful convulsions of the other and continued to move, their orgasms carrying on until another followed on its tails and both cried out in unison, their mouths open wide and their foreheads bumping together again and their eyes peeled as they refused to look away from the other, and by the time the whole event started to wind down they were both so impossibly exhausted that Bianca could only fall backward onto the bed as Marissa toppled down behind her, and the only energy that Bianca had to spare was enough to lift her arms to rest across Marissa's back as they laid there and waited for their breathing and heartbeats to find each other again.

/

"Two cups of coffee and one peanut butter and jelly sandwich to share, as ordered," Bianca said happily as she eased the bedroom door shut behind her, nearly stumbling over her own feet and spilling the coffee everywhere at the sight of Marissa sitting naked in her bed waiting for her. Marissa smiled as she crossed the room and took a cup of coffee from her while Bianca set the plate with their sandwich on the nightstand and sat down on the edge of the bed beside her. Marissa cocked an eyebrow and squinted at the brunette, who innocently sipped her coffee until she finally asked "What?"

Marissa took Bianca's coffee and turned to place both cups on the nightstand before crawling back to her girlfriend, her hands immediately lifting to the collar of her robe to pull it downward. "Take this off," she whispered into her ear as the fabric slid across her incredible shoulders and fell down her arms while Marissa trailed kisses along the back of her neck and Bianca shivered as she stood again, the purple robe falling to the floor as she turned back to face her lover.

"Better?" she asked with a grin as she leaned over the redhead, who only nodded as they crawled backward across the bed and Marissa pulled Bianca down on top of her, their hands roaming as their tongues danced together but it wasn't long before the low grumble of Marissa's rumbling stomach interrupted them and Bianca immediately laughed against Marissa's kiss. "See?" she asked with an amused glint in her eye. "You're hungry."

"Yes I am," Marissa agreed as she gripped Bianca's neck firmly and pulled her back, but the brunette forced herself not to give in.

"Nope – not this time," she said with a smile as she sat up. "I think four times is enough for the moment and I won't fold until you eat something."

"Party pooper," Marissa said with a fake glare, but Bianca only chuckled and retrieved the sandwich. She handed half to Marissa and took a bite of her own.

"Call me whatever you want, you need your strength," Bianca told her through a tacky mouthful, to which Marissa cocked an eyebrow and leaned forward again.

"Oh?" she asked coyly. "For what?"

"No idea," Bianca teased her, leaning carefully backward away from the slowly advancing redhead as she took another bite. "But I wouldn't want you to pass out on me from malnutrition just in case we… ahem… end up burning more calories."

And just like that the sandwich was in Marissa's mouth and she chewed fast, finding that her jaw was sore and her lips a little tender but she ignored it to get the sandwich to disappear. Bianca watched her and couldn't help but laugh at her enthusiasm, but her amusement was quickly replaced with a different kind of hunger and suddenly the peanut butter and strawberry jam in her mouth tasted like flavorless paste that only glued her mouth together so she reached for her coffee, depositing the remainder of the sandwich on the plate as she turned back to her girlfriend.

Marissa took another bite and a glop of jam fell out of the bottom and landed on her chest, leaving a sticky red trail along the valley between her breasts and she reached for the napkin on the plate but Bianca cut her off, instead taking the last quarter of the sandwich from her and tossing it aside before spinning back toward Marissa, pushing her back down on the bed as she greedily cleaned up the mess with her mouth. Marissa painfully forced herself to swallow the last bite as she lay back against the sheets, relieved to have it gone before Bianca's kisses reached her chin. She sighed contentedly as Bianca kissed her and the two allowed themselves a long moment to simply enjoy it before the brunette's head raised and she pushed her frazzled hair out of her eyes as she leaned against her elbow.

"You know I probably should have made us something that's a little less messy," she said, but Marissa shook her head.

"I don't know – I kind of enjoyed the cleanup. I was actually just thinking of making another…"

"Well then let's do it with something besides strawberry jam or peanut butter," Bianca told her. "Those aren't exactly what I would call sexy foods."

Marissa chuckled and nodded. "Whipped cream? Chocolate syrup? Any flavor of cake frosting? You can take your pick – these are all good."

"Wow… sounds like I might have to make a trip to the store."

"Yeah but not at three in the morning," Marissa replied as she hugged her closer. "Right now I'm kind of thinking about round five…"

"Are you now?" Bianca asked with a grin as Marissa pecked her lips. "Catching on quick I see."

"You better believe it," Marissa said, brushing a fallen strand of Bianca's hair from her beautiful eyes. "I could go all night Bee. In fact I could go all day tomorrow too."

"Oh really? You really think you have that much in you huh?"

"Oh I know I do," Marissa told her with a confident nod. "Think you can keep up?"

"I wish I could try but we really only have about three hours before our kids get up and we have to get them ready for school," Bianca replied as she forcefully tamed her breathing. "And after that we have to put our big girl panties back on and go to work. As much as I don't want to believe it the real world still exists beyond that door."

But Marissa only grinned impishly and leaned forward for another blistering kiss, pulling back just far enough for their noses to graze one other as she fixed the brunette with a lustful glare. "Okay I'll concede about the kids," she started, her voice barely above a whisper, "but afterward I'm thinking that I might just come down with a bad case of a virus and will be forced to call in sick."

Bianca swallowed hard. "And what virus might that be?"

"The 'I really just want to stay home and have sex with my girlfriend all day' virus," Marissa supplied. "You better stay away from me or you might catch it."

Bianca immediately surged forward and crashed their mouths together again, only pulling away after her tongue had completed a thorough sweeping of the inside of Marissa's mouth. As she pulled back she smacked her lips and shrugged. "Too late I guess."

"Real shame," Marissa said as she laughed happily, the two smiling so widely that their tender lips started to ache again and Marissa reached a hand up to hold Bianca's incredible face, her expression morphing into seriousness which Bianca returned. "Okay I'm about to overuse the word 'perfect' here and I'm also going to cuss a little bit, so bear with me," she began somewhat breathlessly, forcing herself not to get lost in Bianca's magical gaze. "And do me a favor and don't interrupt me until I get this out. I need to say it."

Bianca nodded and Marissa took a steadying breath. "Okay. If I had known how fucking perfect this was going to turn out to be I would have made sure that this was the way it was from day one. But life doesn't really work like that and that's okay because I'm focusing on the fact that we're together now, and that's perfect. _We're_ so goddamned perfect that I still don't really even get it. AJ loves you and you love him and I love the girls and the girls love me and I love you so fucking much that I feel like I'm having a heart attack every time you walk in a room. You started out as my perfect best friend and now you're my perfect soul mate and I _know_ that there isn't anything that's ever going to mess up this perfectly perfect picture that is you and me together.

"And tonight – god being with you like this is the most incredibly perfect thing I've ever experienced and I'm including pretty much _everything_ that's ever happened to me. I have never connected with someone so intensely – you literally took me to another dimension with your mad mad skills, all of that only compounded of course by the fact that it was you here with me. And I don't want to rush you or move too fast but I just need you to understand that I'm in – I am _all_ in. Every last part of me and all the parts of me that I didn't know I had until you showed them to me. They're all yours – I'm all yours. This is exactly where I belong; right here inside your perfect arms with your perfect eyes looking back at me and our perfect kids sleeping down the hall. This is what heaven on earth looks like and that terrifies me so much that I feel like it could crush me but then I just look up and you're there and then it's okay. Everything's perfect again. And it's because of you, because you're so fucking perfect for me and just in a general kind of way. Perfect perfection – that's the only word that's even kind of close enough to describing it. I know I'm over abusing it but that's really the only one. Just perfect. That's it."

Marissa closed her mouth and swallowed hard as she finished, her mouth then so parched that she wanted to retrieve her coffee but she couldn't move as she studied Bianca's face for her reaction, which had remained stuck with the same faint smile and shimmering eyes the entire time she had rambled. After a quiet moment Bianca cleared her throat and took a deep breath.

"That's…" she began, her voice incredibly shaky but she couldn't help it. She looked up and tried to get her eyes to focus as the heavy tears began to pool in them, spilling over quickly and Marissa's warm hands came to rest tenderly on her cheeks as she wiped them way. "That's just – perfect," Bianca finally managed to say, her smile almost outshining Marissa's as she closed the distance between them, wrapping her love inside her arms as they sank back slowly onto the cool sheets, both tasting the other's happy tears that ran into their mouths. Minutes later Bianca finally pulled back, gazed intensely into Marissa's sparkling honey eyes and whispered "Round five."

After that it was nothing short of perfection.


	10. Exes: in the Plural

**Oookay so here's the skinny –**

**Prospect Park has dropped the ball and dropped our AMC. It was a sad day for this girl to read that news and I'm sure my mourning is shared by many. **

*****collective sniffle*****

**BUT – Kleenexes everyone – now here's the good news that I've decided to create and focus on to help with all the sorrow. Now we get to take our Minx any direction we choose. Christina and Sarah bestowed on us these lovely lovelies in spite of the soapy madness around them, and now since the show did not receive its proper send-off or ending since PP asked them to leave a cliffhanger there is just an endless possibility of directions that can follow from here, many of which have already been hit on heavily and in quite wonderful ways. But the directions are endless and so I've decided to take mine. Minx will live on.**

**So after many hours of endless highway in which I spent a good portion contemplating my next move here I finally came to a grueling decision… I'm going to merge this story with the ending of AMC despite my repulsion of the madness they threw JR into just so he would hit bottom and charge into a room full of friends and family with a gun. I might hate the guy but I don't believe that he would really do such a thing, although I'm no AMC expert. Just an opinion. Although that's what I'm going to have to work with and so I'll deal.**

**So this story will eventually wind up where AMC left us hanging, but not just yet. I'd like to see if I can figure out how to borrow from the show and get JR to where he needs to be (hiding in some freaky tunnel behind the wall swigging Jack Daniels and pounding a gun against his forehead) and get Bianca and Marissa to where they need to be (in love and moving in together) while still maintaining the setup I gave them in the first part. We'll see how it goes.**

**And P.S. – I managed to snag some internet access out here on the road and couldn't resist putting up the small amount I've got completed. I'm afraid that unless I can manage to do some mad mad writing tomorrow (possible… but don't hold me to it) then it will be another little while before the next chapter goes up.**

**And once again a big loud thank you for all the wonderful kindness for my last chapter. Warm-fuzzies and goofy smiling occurred. You guys be awesome.**

_**Exes – in the Plural**_

_Six days,_ Bianca thought happily as she once again allowed herself to zone out of her work and rest her elbows on her desk, now learning to enjoy the gentle flip in her stomach every time she thought about her beautiful girlfriend. _I've been with Marissa for six days._

And those six days had been as near to perfect as six days could possibly get, filled with seemingly endless hours of giggling with the kids and, as often as they could possibly manage, a substantial amount of adult Bianca-Marissa time which basically consisted of lots and lots of sex. And talking. Lots of sex and talking.

Over the course of their six nights spent together they had managed to fill one another in on many of the gaps that still remained about the other's past; Bianca had detailed Marissa on the true events of Miranda and AJ's births, or at least the minor parts to which she was still unaware, and Marissa then gave Bianca a more thorough recount of the childhood she spent with her adoptive parents, whom Marissa still did and always would consider her real family. Bianca could have willingly sat and listened to the redhead talk for hours on end and would have never gotten bored, even if she had decided to delve into the process of studying for her bar exam (which of course she didn't). It seemed that no matter what Marissa told her Bianca would unquestioningly find it to be utterly fascinating, mainly because the sound of her girlfriend's voice as well as the fact that she was confiding in her made Bianca's heart expand to the size of a basketball. And much to her own delight Bianca had quickly discovered that confiding in Marissa was equally as satisfying, even when discussing the more delicate and darker instances of her past. Without much persuasion at all Bianca had filled Marissa in on as much as she could remember about Michael Cambias, a conversation which had resulted in tears, tenderness, compassion and ultimately a three-hour sexual connection experience that still made Bianca's toes curl just thinking about it.

And curl they did as she sat behind the large oak desk in her office, finding it nearly impossible to concentrate on the work she was desperately trying to catch up on after her two – ahem – _sick_ days at the start of the week. Nothing could really hold her attention quite like the memories of the past few days and suddenly an unexpected realization hit Bianca out of nowhere as she once again replayed the many highlights.

"Oh my god," she whispered into the silence of her office, her eyes wide as they gazed out the open window. "We haven't even been on a real date."

And indeed they hadn't, not with the hubbub of keeping up with three children as well as their jobs, their hours at home spent taming the kids' constant excitement about their new family situation and their hours at work – when they forced themselves to go – spent pouring over all the things they kept trying to ignore. But Bianca immediately knew that their lack of a first date would have to be remedied and soon – JR's impending arrival back in Pine Valley the next day would likely wipe out the weekend which basically left her with two options: either wait until the following week or set something up for that night.

"Tonight it is," Bianca smiled as she reached for her phone and dialed Kendall's number.

"Hello?" she answered after the fourth ring, and Bianca instantly sensed the edginess in her voice.

"Hey Kendall – you okay?"

"Oh hey Binx," Kendall said with a heavy sigh. "Yeah I'm fine – just trying to sort out some stuff for Fusion that I really don't understand. Something about legal jargon just makes my head spin. I may have to make a call to your girlfriend soon and see if she can help me. I'm about to go nuts."

"Well I'm sure Marissa would be happy to help you," Bianca replied, her face flushing as her sister used the term 'girlfriend' in reference to her. "You should call her if you're having that much trouble."

"Are you sure she isn't too busy playing catch-up after her _illness_ earlier this week?" Kendall responded, laying heavily on her sarcasm and Bianca could clearly see her mockingly raised eyebrow in her head.

"You… you know Marissa called in sick?" she asked, and Kendall chuckled on her end of the line.

"Binx you know that nothing is sacred here in Pine Valley," she told her. "I'm pretty sure that no one besides Caleb really knows the reason for the sick days but there are a few who happened to notice the correlation between her call-ins and yours. You know how it goes – everyone's a private investigator when it comes to everyone else's business." Bianca inhaled a sharp breath and tried to keep her mind from scattering, but once again Kendall already knew what she was thinking. "Relax Binx," she went on soothingly. "As far as I know there are no rumors about you two yet, although I wouldn't be surprised if they start to spread soon. And while we're on that topic when are you planning on going public together?"

"Well we've kind of talked about it and we're pretty sure that once JR gets back tomorrow there's going to be no way to stop it from exploding all over town, not with his uncontrollable anger and aptitude for revenge," Bianca replied with a heavy sigh.

"I hear that," Kendall agreed. "Well what about Marissa? How is she feeling about all this? Still as incredibly happy as she looked on Sunday?"

"I would certainly like to think so," Bianca said with a wide smile. "I've actually been amazed at her assuredness about everything. As far as I can tell she's not scared of anyone finding out, we've only kept our mouths shut this far because we felt like the most important people knew with the exception of mom and we wanted to enjoy it by ourselves for a little bit. But with JR coming back I'm certain that it's not going to stay that way. I'm almost positive he's going to come back and pop the happy bubble we've been living in for the past few days."

"Well let's hope not, but if he tries he'll have the Kane women to answer to."

"I'm trying to be prepared for anything," Bianca told her. "Five days alone in Paris is plenty of time for JR to come up with something that could shock the rest of us – it's not like he hasn't done it before."

"Yeah well if he gets too out of control you know who to call for backup," Kendall said with a sly edge to her voice. "The Kanes shall overcome."

"Well speaking of backup I do have a small favor to ask you, although I don't want to overload you since you're having such a tough time with Fusion apparently."

"Ah – don't worry about that. It'll sort out one or another. Hit me."

"Well – uh – Marissa and I haven't actually had our first date yet," Bianca started, blushing again as she tried to think how to skirt around telling her sister the real reasons for not having done it yet, feeling like it could be rather uncomfortable to admit that they'd simply been too busy sexing one another up to think about much else. "And I'd like to make that happen before JR comes back," she went on hurriedly, "and that pretty much leaves tonight so I was wondering if you'd be willing to watch the girls and AJ for the evening."

"First date huh?" Kendall asked amusedly, and Bianca could tell that she assumed more than she was going to say. "What did you have in mind?"

"Er… I don't know yet actually," Bianca admitted, sitting back in her chair. "I hadn't really thought that far. I just wanted to make sure that you could keep the kids first I guess."

"Binx you know you don't really have to ask," her sister told her. "Of course I'd be happy to. Spike will be especially thrilled that AJ will be there. But seriously – where are you taking her? Since it's Marissa you're going to have to do something outstanding you know."

"I know," Bianca agreed as she rubbed her eyes, a few ideas running through her head but none of them really seemed good enough. "Any advice?"

"Well Binx you know I've never actually dated a girl so I'm somewhat unfamiliar with the goings-on of a lesbian themed date, but I would assume that they are for the most part quite similar to those of us heteros and so I'm just gonna throw out dinner and a movie. Or a play. Or maybe even the opera. I'm not really sure it matters since we all know where dates usually end up. It's really all just build-up to the main event, right?"

"My goodness you're forward," Bianca said, covering her blush with her hands despite the fact that she was alone in her office. "And while you're pretty much right I still would like to do something special for her. Dinner and a movie just isn't going to cut it."

"A hot air balloon ride? A horse-drawn carriage to a private dinner in the park? A personal orchestra for dinner music? And maybe for effect you could have a song composed just for the two of you which you can then have a troubadour serenade you while you profess your undying love. _That_ would be kind of epic. Ooh! Or you could…"

"Okay you're no longer being helpful," Bianca cut her off, laughing aloud at her sister's absurdity. "All of those sound like some over-the-top marriage proposal scenarios and I'm pretty sure we're not quite there yet. But thanks anyway."

"Okay well, if you still draw a blank I'll just add the possibility of a private band on a rooftop lit by candlelight with…"

"Okay thanks Kendall, that's a big help," Bianca interjected again, reaching for the disconnect button on the phone base. "I'll drop the kids at your place around six unless you hear otherwise."

"Alright," Kendall replied happily, clearly quite amused with herself. "Oh! And what about…"

But Bianca merely pressed the button to end the call after another thanks and goodbye, shaking her head at what Kendall believed to be 'helpfulness.' But once she hung up the phone she was left inside the pressing stillness of her expansive office, gazing unseeingly out the windows while she scrambled to come up with something to fill the evening. After a few minutes of futile contemplation she allowed her mind to wander, obviously very quickly settling on the gorgeous redhead she was so extraordinarily in love with.

_What does Marissa like to do?_ she asked herself, and immediately answered with _Sex. Marissa is a _very_ sexual being as it turns out._ And once again she blushed without any outside help. _Okay move on – I can't plan a date around sex. That will certainly be included but there has to be a precursor. Something amazing that will lead us to that part._ And of course the irony of her thoughts and Kendall's earlier declaration were not lost on her, but she pushed past it. But her thoughts were interrupted by the intercom on her phone signaling her assistant beeping in. She clicked the button and answered, "Yes?"

"I have Marissa Tasker on the line for you," her assistant Amanda told her, and Bianca's face instantly stretched into a smile.

"Thanks," she replied as she went to answer the line. "Hello beautiful," she said, and Marissa's soft sigh at the other end made her stomach flip over.

"Hmmmm – hello yourself," she said. "How's your day?"

"Better now," Bianca told her honestly. "Just sitting here trying to stay focused on work. How about you?"

"About the same," Marissa replied. "These case reports just aren't nearly as appealing as daydreaming about you all day. I haven't gotten much done."

"Ditto to that. I keep checking the time wishing it was five o'clock already."

"Well only three hours to go – I think we can make it," she said, but Bianca still heard the deep sigh as she spoke and her grin widened. "In the meantime I'm calling to ask you something, something that will hopefully make both of us feel better."

"Oh?" Bianca inquired curiously, her attention perking as she sat up straight again. "Is it whether I'd be willing to sit through _Finding Nemo_ for the fourth time this week because the answer is going to be a firm no."

"Ah! You were supposed to let me ask!" Marissa said with mock exasperation. "Now you've gone and ruined the whole thing. Way to go."

"Oops," Bianca replied apologetically. "Sorry baby. Next time I'll hold my tongue."

"Maybe you just need me to come over there and occupy it for you," Marissa said, her voice dropping to that sexy husky level that made Bianca's legs go numb. "Would that help?"

"Exponentially," Bianca told her, swallowing hard. "How soon can you be here?"

"Unfortunately not very soon," Marissa said regretfully. "Caleb's weighing me down with tons of paperwork because I'm pretty sure he knows the real reason for my absence earlier this week. But I'll make it up to you, I can promise you that."

"How?" Bianca questioned, unwilling to drop the playful flirting that was going on.

"Well actually I was calling to ask you out on a date," Marissa replied, and Bianca imagined the gorgeous smile she could clearly hear in her voice. "I realized that we haven't actually gotten one and so I'd like to fix that. I've got the whole thing planned – all you have to do is say yes and call your sister to see if she can keep the kids, otherwise I'll call Krystal or maybe Tad."

Bianca had to laugh aloud at the constant symbiosis between the two of them. "I actually hung up with Kendall just five minutes ago to ask her that very thing, though I hadn't actually progressed to the date planning portion."

"You're kidding?" Marissa asked, joining in on her chuckling. "And once again we apparently have the same thoughts. So I guess that's a yes?"

"That's definitely a yes," Bianca told her. "So what will we be up to this child-free evening?"

"Uh uh. You're going to have to wait to find out."

"Tease."

"Guilty," Marissa accepted. "So I'll see you after I pick up Miranda and AJ from school. You're getting Gabby from daycare right?"

"Yeah that's the plan. And I told Kendall we'd drop the kids around six. Is that good?"

"That will be perfect. K I'm gonna have to hang up now if I'm going to have a prayer at finishing this casework before I leave. Bye baby – I love you."

"I love you too," Bianca told her, hating to hear the click on the other end as Marissa hung up but still smiling like a teenager at the prom. As she hung up the phone she couldn't help but lean forward and rest her face in her hands, her eyes drifting once again out the open window as she allowed herself a long moment to bask in the flooding happiness that only Marissa's voice could bring.

/

And Bianca was gifted with another two and a half hours of basking in that bliss before most of it was ripped forcefully out of her chest, and it all started with just another phone call.

She heard the beeps before she saw the flashing red light of Amanda paging in, finally looking up from the Miranda Center's financial statements after two hours of making herself focus on it and absently hit the button to answer her.

"Yes?"

"Uh – Bianca you… you have a phone call," Amanda told her, and Bianca's eyebrows furrowed at the obvious hesitation in her voice.

"Okay – who is it?"

"It's… well it's uh… it's your ex-wife. Reese Williams is on the line."

And when Bianca heard her name she was almost certain that she was going to revisit her lunch at the violently painful flip of her stomach and she froze solid with one hand in the air, holding up a sheet of paper that she could no longer see to read. After a few forced breaths she asked, "Did she say what she wanted?"

"No," Amanda replied quietly. "Just that she needed to speak with you. I can take a message if you'd rather…"

"No – no I'll take it," Bianca said despondently. "Thanks Amanda." And she disconnected from her assistant's desk but didn't click over to the other line yet, instead taking a moment to collect herself.

_Okay – no need to panic,_ she thought. _Reese is allowed to call. Even though she hasn't bothered to for months, not even to check on the girls..._ And just like that her uneasiness was replaced with a swell of bitter anger and her finger hit the button as she snatched up the receiver.

"Reese," she said flatly, not bothering with further pleasantries as she waited for the woman to respond.

"Bi – Bianca," came Reese's diffident voice. "Hello."

"Hello."

Silence.

"Umm… how are you?" Reese ventured after a tense moment, and Bianca was pleased to hear that she was clearly very uncomfortable.

"I'm quite well, thank you," she replied, and then continued to wait in stony silence for her ex-wife to go on.

"Well g-good. And the girls? How are Miranda and Gabrielle?"

"They're doing well too," Bianca told her, purposely stopping herself from continuing. If Reese really wanted to know she would press the subject, but unsurprisingly she moved on instead.

"That's great," Reese said. "I uh – I'm actually calling with a somewhat peculiar question for you but I don't know who else to call." She paused as if waiting for Bianca to respond to that but the brunette kept her resolve and didn't cave so eventually Reese went on. "Okay well umm… well JR was here in Paris this week – I'm not sure if you knew that or not – but he was here checking on the progress of our newest building and… well… he wasn't really acting like himself. I'm not sure if you knew anything about what might be going on with him."

"How was he acting?" Bianca asked, her chest constricting in anticipation of whatever Reese was going to tell her. "What do you mean he hasn't been acting like himself?"

"Well he's been drinking mostly and as far as I knew he's a recovering alcoholic and it certainly raised some flags among the staff over here when he'd show up wasted every day. Outside of that he's also been outwardly angry toward pretty much everybody and this morning he actually threw a chair and smashed it after he stumbled over it in his drunken state. Is there something going on personally that's caused him to be like this or has it been going on for a while? Because it's been pretty much constant since he showed up on Monday morning but he won't tell anybody what's wrong. He just mutters something about how he's fine and then stumbles off someplace."

Bianca was quiet for a long moment, unable to figure out how to respond. _How much should I tell her? How much does she really need to know? How am I supposed to tell my ex-wife that her boss is getting drunk because he found out that _I'm_ sleeping with _his_ ex-wife? The ex-wife who also handled my side of our divorce… sweet Jesus this is one hell of a corner I'm in…_

"Bianca?" Reese said after a minute. "If you don't know anything that's fine… like I said I just really needed to see if I could get some information and there's no one else in Pine Valley that I felt like I could call. We're just a little worried about him over here and there are lots of members of the board who would like some answers. So anything you can tell me would be really appreciated."

"He… ahem… JR hadn't had a drink in two years as far as I knew," Bianca finally stammered, searching her voice for the unyielding resolve from before but it had fled along with Reese's information. "He's been very proud of his sobriety so the news that he's fallen off the wagon is new to me."

"So there's nothing going on back home that might have set him off?" Reese pressed, and Bianca finally decided that the vaguest answer possible was the best way to go.

"Well his ex-wife recently moved out of the mansion again," she told her. "He did appear pretty upset about that."

"Why was his ex-wife living with him at the mansion? Were they getting back together or something?"

"She moved back in to be closer to AJ but moved out when JR got up to his old tricks again," Bianca informed her, careful not to go too far. This was not a conversation she really wanted to have, especially with her ex-wife who she could hardly stand to continue talking to due solely to her evident disinterest in their daughters. She was far too preoccupied with investigating JR's problems and it was really beginning to piss her off.

"And I guess that was fairly recent then?" Reese asked, and much to Bianca's chagrin she clearly heard the interest in her tone and she worked to hold on to her patience.

"Yes Reese that was at the beginning of this week," she told her pointedly. "Marissa tried to get her things from the mansion on Saturday but JR had locked them up. We weren't able to go over and get them until after he'd gone to Paris."

"We?" Reese questioned, her interest plainly spiking at Bianca's use of the word. "You helped his ex-wife move out of the house?"

Bianca sighed heavily at her slip-up but charged forward anyway. "Yes I did."

"Wait – did you say Marissa? Is this the same Marissa that handled our divorce for you? Marissa… Tasker was it?"

"Yep that's the one."

There was a short pause before Reese continued. "Huh… alright. So that Marissa is JR's ex-wife. Interesting."

"Why is that interesting?"

"Oh only because now I can make a connection I guess. I didn't know that. I mean I knew that JR had been married but I didn't know who it was with. And he's obviously pretty broken up over it, which is even more surprising since you said that they were already divorced. They weren't getting back together? Are you sure? If she had been living in the mansion with him then…"

"No they weren't getting back together," Bianca cut her off, her patience wearing extremely thin. "Why do you care so much? What difference does it make really?"

"I might be able to ask you a similar question," Reese fired back. "Why are you getting so defensive? Did this Marissa do something besides simply move out that sent JR over the edge? Because his reaction seems pretty severe if they weren't getting back together. He's basically fallen apart. I hardly recognize the man."

Bianca took a steadying breath before answering. "She moved on to someone else," she said finally, "and when JR found out he got pretty upset. I'm sure that's why he's responded so badly – you know how JR hates to lose."

"I do," Reese agreed, and there was a long pause that had Bianca worrying slightly. "Did you see what happened? It sounds like you're obviously friends with this Marissa woman so do you know what happened?"

"That's really none of your business," Bianca told her, but she could tell from Reese's tone that she was growing suspicious and likely wouldn't let up.

"Hey I'm just trying to gather some information to pass along to the board," Reese told her innocently. "The more I can give them the better and you are obviously quite informed on the subject. So if you didn't see what happened did Marissa tell you about it?"

"Yes Reese I was there," Bianca finally caved, by then kind of liking the idea of slapping her ex with the knowledge that Marissa wasn't the only one who had moved on. "Marissa and I are together now. JR is pissed off not only that she moved on but that she did it with a woman. His homophobic undertone is coming out apparently and quite frankly it really doesn't surprise me that he's gone running back to the bottle to help him deal. He's done it many times before. So there – is that enough information for you or would you like a blow-by-blow of the coming out scene as well?"

"No – no that's enough," Reese muttered quietly, and they both sank into a tremendously tense silence filled only with the sound of their shallow breathing. "So you've moved on," Reese finally said after the quiet became unbearable. "That's… good for you. Umm – congratulations I guess."

Bianca couldn't find it in her to reply, instead blinking down at the scattered papers in front of her as she rubbed her temple. "Look Reese," she said after a moment, "I'm sorry I just blurted it out like that and I'm sorry I got irritated. But it is still pretty new and I wasn't expecting to hear from you and telling you wasn't something I'd actually considered. But that's the way it is and evidently it's causing some pretty bad repercussions with JR. I'm sure tomorrow when he gets back it's going to be even worse."

"Uh – JR said he was going back to Pine Valley this evening," Reese told her, and Bianca's head shot up.

"What?" she asked, her heart starting to race. "How long ago was that? What time is it there?"

"It's after two in the morning. I tried to wait until it would be a good time for you before I called. But JR announced he was flying home after our last meeting, which wrapped up about six hours ago I guess."

"Oh shit – I've got to go," Bianca said, jumping up and scrambling around for her purse and her keys. "Thanks for the warning Reese but I've got to go pick up Gabby and then get back to warn Marissa. We weren't expecting him until tomorrow and I don't want him to try anything stupid before we have a chance to plan ahead."

"You're getting Gabby?" Reese asked, some of the sadness gone from her voice as she said their daughter's name. "Give her a hug and kiss for me, will you?"

"I tell you what Reese, why don't you take some time out of your obviously busy schedule of investigating the personal life of your boss and come over here and do it yourself," Bianca told her, done trying to play nice in her anxiousness to get back to Marissa. "Thanks for the warning. Goodbye."

She slammed the receiver down and bolted out of her office without waiting for the reply, calling over her shoulder to Amanda that she'd see her tomorrow and to forward her calls as she wildly dialed Marissa's cell phone and broke into a dead sprint in the direction of her car.


	11. First Date: Almost

**Can't do it. Won't do it. I take back everything I said at the start of the last chapter. Evidently the intensity of the thousands and thousands of endless highway miles in my car worked very much like a convection oven and turned my brain into a bowl of mashed potatoes. But I'm home now. All better. Over it.**

**Not gonna. Not gonna throw JR into the pit of absolute darkness. Too much soapy psychosis for this girl and that storyline came to a screeching halt in my head almost as soon as I tried writing it. Ugh. Reese seems like a much more interesting avenue to explore for two reasons: one, I actually kind of liked the chick until she went all super bitch crazy and tried to – essentially – kidnap her own daughters. Super bitch times ten. Now all I want to see is the smackdown that Marissa will slap her with. Done and done. And second, we saw the folly 'twixt JR/Marissa/Bianca/AJ and the writers completely effed it up. I no longer have the energy to try to fix it. I'd like to sidle on over to the Montgomery plane of thought and give some long overdue attention to the two most delightful and overlooked girls on TV. Plus I still have the problem of one Ms. Erica Kane. Haven't forgotten – don't worry.**

**But I can't leave JR out in the cold and regardless of my abhorrence for him I find that I truly believe he's got a soft spot and at least an average sized heart in there somewhere so we're still tackling that issue for a tiny bit longer. Too much setup and now I'm having to backtrack so forgive me – it will get better in due time. I'm quite sick of writing drama and – much to my own chagrin – would much rather watch all the bright shiny Minx moments that make me use expletives that I would never use in public. The Minx Fever just does it to me – I take no responsibility for it.**

**So I'm sticking to my title and taking this story wherever the F I want it to go. Forget AMC and their bizarre drama/ending and forget Prospect Park who is – in my humble opinion – duly responsible for **_**at least**_** the senseless ending. Don't tell somebody to leave a cliffhanger and then drop the show. I may hate soaps but I can at least understand that a show that was on the air for 40 some-odd years deserves a hell of a lot better than that. But whatevs. That part's out of my hands.**

**Onward.**

_**First Date… Almost**_

Bianca tried to get ahold of Marissa for the entire drive to Gabby's daycare, dialing her number repeatedly but each time she was answered with nothing but her voicemail. Just as she pulled into the circle loop to pick up her youngest daughter she had reached the point where she was going to just call Marissa's office but her cell phone dinged with a text message from the redhead.

_"Got pulled into a meeting with new clients. Should be done by 5:15 but I'll still be a little late. Can you pick up Mimo and AJ for me? I'll make that up to you too… Everything okay?"_

Despite the fact that she wouldn't be able to speak to her right away Bianca exhaled a sigh of relief, her mounting apprehension at not being able to reach her girlfriend finally dissipating. Not wanting to worry her while trying to land new clients she replied:

_"Everything's fine. Just need to talk to you as soon as you can. I'm getting Gabby now and then I'll get Mimo and AJ. No worries. Love you."_

To which Marissa quickly responded:

_"K good thanks. I'll try to hurry out of here. See you at home soon. Love you back. Can't wait for date night ;)"_

Bianca sighed and forced a smile at her daughter who was hurrying with her teacher toward her car, and as she opened the door to retrieve the little girl she thought_ Hmm… Let's hope we still get to date night._

/

"Hi mommy!"

"Hey Bianca!"

Miranda and AJ's greetings as they climbed into Bianca's car were sunny and cheerful, just the extra perk she was craving on top of Gabby's broken chatter to keep her mind away from fixating on JR's ominous early arrival.

"I thought my mom was picking us up today," AJ said as they buckled in, and Bianca grinned when she saw Miranda lean over and kiss her little sister's cheek in the rearview mirror.

"She wanted to but she's in a meeting that's taking a little bit so you got me instead," she replied, watching as Gabby returned a kiss to Miranda and then leaned around her to pat AJ's knee.

The boy smiled at her and then said to Bianca, "Well that's okay. Hey guess what happened at school today?"

"What happened?"

"I got to get out of class for a little bit to go to the office because I got a call from daddy in Paris!" he informed her happily, and Bianca felt her eyes widen but quickly hid her instant anxiety as AJ's cheerful eyes were fixed on her in the rearview. "He sounded really happy too, and he said that he's going to be home tonight and that I don't have to go to school tomorrow so we can play together all day. How cool is that?"

"What?" Miranda asked him. "You didn't tell me you don't have to go to school tomorrow!"

"Well that's what my daddy said," AJ replied with another toothless grin. "He said that he missed me so much that he wants to spend a whole bunch of time with me."

"Is that all he said buddy?" Bianca asked cautiously, trying to keep the kids from hearing that she was having a hard time catching her breath.

"Yeah kinda," AJ told her offhandedly. "He was laughing a lot and sometimes it was hard to understand what he was saying but he said it was just cuz he was calling from so far away. Oh!" he bellowed, slapping a tiny hand against his forehead. "I was supposed to keep it a surprise! Daddy told me not to tell anybody because he wanted to surprise everybody so don't tell mommy okay? I forgot that part but maybe we can still keep the surprise for her – she loves surprises."

"Your dad asked you not to tell anybody he was coming back early?" Bianca asked, her heart dropping down into her stomach as the outline of JR's plan started coming into focus. "Did he say when he was going to be back?"

"He said he would come to Wildwind since that's where we're staying and that I should wait outside for him at seven o'clock," AJ informed her. "He wanted me to be outside so I could help him with the surprise."

"Did he ask you to wait outside alone?" Bianca went on, terrified that she already knew the answer.

AJ nodded his beautiful little blonde head. "Yeah. He said that if I was outside alone then we could surprise everybody together," he told her innocently. "Please don't tell mommy I ruined the surprise… I was really excited to do this because he sounded so much happier than when he left last weekend. I want everybody to be happy again. I can't believe I ruined it!"

"Hey don't worry about it buddy, I'm really glad you told me," Bianca tried to comfort him around the enormously painful lump in her throat. "I think it's wonderful that you were so excited to do something you thought would be nice."

AJ perked a little at this and luckily was scooped up in conversation with Miranda and Gabby about his "free day off" tomorrow while Bianca's fingers gripped painfully around the wheel and her cell phone, forcing steady breaths to keep her vision straight for her precious cargo but wanting desperately to drive straight to Marissa's office for help. But she knew that would only make the kids suspicious and AJ's exuberance at what he thought would be a pleasant arrival by his father was something she knew the boy should hold on to – if they could manage to get past the evening without deepening the crevice between father and son it would be an absolute miracle but she knew with complete certainty that that's what Marissa would want. So instead she focused intently on the road in front of her and strained to hear every word that AJ said for any new information, but by the time they pulled into Wildwind her legs were sore from tensing so much and she wanted nothing more than for Marissa to get back there as quickly as humanly possible.

/

_Okay stop panicking,_ Bianca told herself firmly as she stood in the kitchen preparing dinner for the kids but she was having a hard time focusing on the chicken tenders she was grilling. _AJ is fine. I can hear the kids clearly over the open intercom in the playroom upstairs. JR is not here. JR is not going to kidnap that little boy. I don't even know for sure if that's what he's planning._

_But drunk JR is very different from sober JR, and hurt drunk self-pitying JR is downright dangerous,_ she reminded herself darkly, forcing down memories of her own to stay focused on the present situation. _Marissa just needs to get here so I can talk about it with her instead of circling endlessly in my head. I'm just working myself up over what could turn out to be nothing…_

_But JR asked AJ to wait outside _alone._ And he told him not to tell anybody that he was coming home early. And it was hard to understand him because he was likely drunk off his ass. _And_ he told AJ that he didn't have to go to school tomorrow. If those aren't indicators of a JR Chandler plan to get his way then I'm really a blind idiot._

_Jesus Marissa – hurry up…_

She checked the time on the stove again. 5:32 pm.

_Okay if the meeting ended at 5:15 then it would take her about twenty minutes to get from her office to here. But if the meeting didn't end at that time then…_

"Hey love," came Marissa's soft voice from right behind her as arms slid smoothly around her waist and the redhead pressed a kiss on the back of Bianca's neck. She had been so preoccupied with her inner dialogue that she didn't hear Marissa sneak in and it startled her horribly as she jumped inside of her girlfriend's grasp. "Oops – sorry," Marissa chuckled as Bianca turned to face her. "I didn't mean to scare y… what's wrong?" Her eyebrows immediately furrowed as she took in the brunette's strained expression, her happy grin instantly morphing into concern. Bianca moved forward and wrapped the woman tightly in her arms, savoring the sensation of feeling much of her tension melt out of her limbs as Marissa held her closely in return. "What's the matter?" she asked again, trying to pull back to look into Bianca's eyes but she held her fast.

"We have a problem," she said quietly into Marissa's delicious red hair, feeling like she could cry at the massive relief that washed over her now that her girlfriend was there with her.

"What kind of problem?" Marissa asked, rubbing her back comfortingly.

And for just a brief moment Bianca wondered if she could even tell her, knowing the effect it would have on her enormous heart to hear what JR was apparently up to. She finally pulled away and gazed into her eyes, but before she spoke she leaned in for a tender kiss that she knew would only worry her further but she couldn't resist.

"Okay now you're kind of freaking me out," Marissa told her as she pulled away. "What's going on? What happened?"

"I tried to call you earlier but since you were in a meeting I didn't want to worry you," Bianca finally replied, leading them over to the breakfast nook so they could sit down. They took chairs right next to each other and held their hands together as Bianca searched for the right place to start.

"Worry me about what?" Marissa asked hesitantly, and Bianca squeezed her love's hands and braced herself.

"JR is on his way back to Pine Valley tonight," and she noticed Marissa's grip tighten at the mention of his name. "Evidently he called AJ at school today and told him to meet him outside alone later and not to tell anybody he would be here. He said he wanted it to be a 'surprise.' He also told AJ that he didn't have to go to school tomorrow so they could 'play together all day.' But Riss… he's drunk. He's been drunk every day since he got to Paris and from what AJ described earlier I'd say he was drunk when he called too. I don't know what he's planning but it sounds like…"

"He's trying to kidnap my son instead of face the reality of the situation," Marissa finished for her, her gorgeous eyes wide in shock but Bianca could clearly see the angry edge in them. "That's exactly what it sounds like to me. But how do you know all of this?"

"Well AJ accidently told me about JR's call when I picked the kids up from school," Bianca supplied. "I think he was so excited that he'd gotten out of class to take it that he forgot about JR asking him not to tell. And thank goodness really – if he hadn't then who knows what would have happened come seven o'clock."

"Nothing probably, because according to our plans AJ and the girls would have been at your sister's house," Marissa told her. "Most likely JR would have come here and found the place empty, or he might have even run into Caleb or Asher. But you said that he's getting drunk again – how do you know that? He's been getting drunk since he arrived in Paris?"

"Oh yeah…" Bianca began, suddenly remembering her conversation with Reese. Having become completely wrapped up in making sure AJ was safe as well as talking to Marissa she had completely forgotten the reason why she knew in the first place, and as she looked into her girlfriend's questioning eyes she wondered how she would react to the news that she'd been tipped off by her ex-wife. "Well that's another interesting twist actually," she charged forward. "Um – do you remember how JR got Reese a job designing the new Chandler offices over in Paris so she would drop the custody case?"

Marissa's hazel eyes immediately flashed with recognition and she sat back but didn't drop Bianca's hands, which made the brunette feel better. "Reese called you," she said quietly, and to Bianca's immense surprise her face didn't harden with jealousy or anger but instead fell quickly into concern and she leaned forward again and ran a hand lovingly along Bianca's cheek. "Are you okay?" she asked, and for a moment Bianca could do nothing but blink at her. "I mean I know you haven't heard from Reese since the divorce and I'm sure hearing from her out of the blue today – especially over something like this – might have brought up some… issues I guess? How did it go? Did she say anything about the girls?"

"She… um… she was more interested in finding out about why JR's been drinking," Bianca muttered, still completely thrown. "She asked about the girls once and then moved on to JR."

"What a bitch," Marissa mumbled angrily. "She _finally_ takes the time to call you and instead of focusing on her daughters she's more wrapped up with snooping around about her boss? I can't believe her." And despite Marissa's blatant anger Bianca felt a smile stretch across her face as she watched, her heart swelling as she fell in love with the woman all over again. Marissa finally looked up at her and noticed her smile, concern turning into confusion as she grinned back. "What?" she asked, and Bianca was so utterly charmed by her cuteness that she leaned forward to kiss her deeply, something which the redhead was more than happy to oblige, and by the time they pulled away they were both smiling broadly again.

"You are the most incredible woman in the whole world," Bianca told her as she kissed her cheek.

"Well I'm happy to see that my ploys to trick you into believing that have worked," Marissa smirked.

"Oh I don't think tricks were necessary. You are outstanding. I just can't believe you sometimes."

"Why's that?"

"Well because of this right here," Bianca replied, removing her hands from Marissa's gorgeous face to return them to gripping her hands. "My ex-wife calls to tell me that your ex-husband has been drinking all week and is possibly planning to kidnap your son and your first reaction to hearing that she called is concern that I'm okay and anger that she didn't seem interested in the girls. You're amazing. I just can't get over it."

"Well it does piss me off that she didn't really ask about the girls," Marissa countered. "That woman called herself their mother and then just drops them for a job? A job where she's working for a drunken egotistical jackass? Yeah – yeah that really pisses me off."

"See?" Bianca challenged her lightly. "Amazing."

"Well gee thanks," Marissa replied as she pecked her lips, but her smile was quickly gone as she pulled back again and took a deep breath. "What are we going to do about this? What else did Reese say about JR?"

"Well she laid pretty heavily on the fact that he's been drunk pretty much constantly since arriving Monday morning," Bianca explained with a heavy sigh. "Apparently the board is very upset with his behavior and are asking a lot of questions which is why she called in the first place. Oh and she also mentioned that he threw a chair and shattered it after he stumbled over it in a drunken stupor."

"Oh my god…" Marissa whispered, clamping a hand over her mouth. "I can't believe he started drinking again. Is he really so upset about you and me that he's drowning himself in alcohol again? What about AJ? Is he not thinking about how that will affect his son? He's been so proud of his sobriety and it… it just doesn't make any sense. I really thought JR was stronger than that."

"Well in my experience with him he is until something doesn't go his way," Bianca told her apologetically, sorry to have to be the one to break this news to her. "After that he can turn very quickly into a man that nobody recognizes, usually fixating on self-pity and anger and blaming everyone around him but himself. He hates to lose and this is a prime example. He had himself pretty well convinced when he showed up in the park on Sunday that he was going to win you back again and when we pretty much slapped him with the news about us I'm sure it just pushed him over the edge."

"That still doesn't give him a reason to turn back to alcohol, and it certainly doesn't mean that he gets to try to take my son," Marissa said flatly. "I don't care why he's decided to ruin his life with booze again after working so hard to stay straight – he's not going to take my son."

"No he's not – we're not going to let him. We'll barricade ourselves in front of AJ night and day if we have to. The last thing that little boy needs is to see his dad like this."

Marissa was silent for a moment as she peered darkly out the bay window beside them. Finally she seemed to come to a decision. "You said AJ was supposed to meet JR outside at seven tonight?"

"Yeah that's what he told me. JR asked him to wait outside alone."

Marissa nodded and her nostrils flared in anger but she pushed past it. "Okay well then I say that we go ahead and send the kids to Kendall's – if there's anywhere else that I feel would be safe enough for AJ tonight it's with her. We'll need to fill her in on the situation so she'll be on the lookout just in case but I really don't want AJ around to see a showdown if there's going to be one. I'd like to keep this civil if at all possible, despite the fact that I'd really like to just punch him in that pretty nose of his." Bianca reached for her purse on the counter to get her cell phone but Marissa pulled her back. "Thank you," she said softly, lifting the brunette's hands to kiss the top of them. "Thank you so much."

"No need to thank me Riss," Bianca told her as she kissed her forehead. "You made sure I got to keep my girls and I'm going to make sure that you keep your son. We're in this together, got it?"

Marissa nodded and smiled weakly. "Got it." Bianca kissed her gently and then got up to get her phone and as she dug around in her bag Marissa heaved a sad sigh. "I guess this is going to ruin date night."

Bianca stopped her search and turned back around. "Well – maybe _this_ date night," she said as she reseated herself in front of her girlfriend, a crooked grin glowing on her face. "But trust me – there will be _many_ more opportunities. I just hope that you didn't go too out of your way since it's evidently not going to pan out. Real life happens."

"I know," Marissa agreed gloomily, trying to match the brunette's grin but failing as she was forced to release the incredible excitement she'd had about the evening and instead having to focus on the terror of what JR might be trying to do. "We'll do it soon. As soon as we settle back down from whatever JR's next stunt is then we'll make it happen."

"Exactly," Bianca assured her. "Tonight the only thing that's important is making sure that AJ stays safe."

"Is he excited about his dad coming home?" Marissa asked, and Bianca nodded slowly.

"He's really excited. He actually asked me not to tell you because he thought that you would be happy about the 'surprise.' He said that he thought JR sounded happier than when he left, although he didn't quite understand that it was probably because he was wasted."

"I don't want AJ to know that JR's getting drunk again," Marissa said firmly, shaking her head. "I want him to hold on to the image of his dad that he has now. I don't want this to ruin their relationship and I just hope that JR finally pulls his head out of his ass long enough to realize that you and I falling in love has nothing to do with him and that it's not a personal attack. I want to get back to the easy joint-custody arrangement we had before, for AJ's sake and mine. I don't want my son to grow up with a drunk or homophobic father, both of which I know deep down are not really who JR is. He's better than this."

"You know one of the things I love the most about you is your ability to always believe the best in people," Bianca told her kindly, brushing a hand tenderly through her hair and Marissa hummed contentedly. "And I want to believe that of JR too. I really do believe it actually. He's not the homophobe he turned into briefly on Sunday – that was just the notorious Chandler anger coming out and homophobic taunts just fueled the fury. But he knows better and he's taught AJ better. You both have and I think that eventually JR will remember that. I really think the biggest issue we have now is getting him sober again. There's nothing more dangerous than JR when he's drunk because he quits thinking clearly. Do you think that sober JR would actually plot to kidnap his own son?"

Marissa shook her head. "That's exactly my point. This whole thing is so incredibly out there that I really don't know whether I should believe it or not."

"Well I think the only thing we can do now is feed the kids and get them to Kendall's," Bianca offered. "Then we'll just have to wait and see what happens when JR shows up."

"What are we going to tell AJ?" Marissa questioned. "If he's excited about his dad coming and getting to surprise me I don't want to just crush that and I certainly don't want to tell him the real reason why he's not going to get to see him."

Bianca thought for a minute before replying. "Well – since he asked me not to tell you then we'll go along with that. I'll just tell him that JR called and that he got stuck in Paris another night. That will have to be good enough and that way AJ can still hope that he's going to get to see him tomorrow."

"And what if JR's still too drunk for that?" Marissa asked quietly, her eyes dropping down to the floor. "What if he's still angry and drunk and we can't do anything to bring him back right away? If we can't talk sense into him then I'll do everything I can to keep AJ from seeing his dad on this downward spiral. That perfect little boy doesn't deserve to see his dad fall apart, whatever the reason."

Bianca nodded slowly, formulating a plan in her mind. She lifted the redhead's face back up and smiled reassuringly as she held up her cell phone. "Well then I guess we're just going to have to make sure that we do talk sense into him, and I think that might require a little backup."

/

Seven o'clock crawled closer far too slowly and yet much too fast for either woman's liking. They fed the kids and after they finished Marissa discretely ushered Miranda and Gabby back into the living room while Bianca stayed back with AJ, asking if he'd mind to help her with the small amount of dishes. As soon as the others were safely out of earshot she turned to the boy though and knelt down to look him in the eye.

"Hey buddy I wanted to wait until your mom was out of the room since you didn't want to tell her about your dad's visit tonight," she started, and AJ grinned and glanced back through the open doorway to make sure that Marissa and the girls were a safe distance away, "but I needed to let you know that he called a little while ago while you were upstairs with Mimo and Gabby."

"Did he say what time he would be here?" AJ whispered, and Bianca's heart cracked at his ever-present excitement.

"He uh… he's not going to be able to make it," she told him, and the little boy's shoulders fell at her words. "He says he's really really sorry to disappoint you but that he's just not quite done with his work yet. He should be home tomorrow like he planned though." AJ stayed silent and looked down at his shoelaces, and Bianca reached over and placed her hands on his shoulders. "Are you okay buddy? I know you were excited to see your dad…"

"It isn't that," AJ started quietly. "I was excited that my daddy said he was coming back early because he wanted to surprise you and mommy. He said that he was going to make it better after the fight in the park last weekend. I was happy that he's going to quit being mean to you and her and that he was going to apologize because I love you and I love my mommy and I want my daddy to be nice to you."

It took Bianca a second to collect herself after AJ's heart wrenching speech and she worked very hard to stop the swell of tears from reaching her eyes. "JR… ahem… your dad said he was going to apologize?"

"Well no – not exactly," AJ replied, finally looking up at her again. "He just said he was going to make it right. And I want him to make it better – I don't want you and mommy to be mad at him anymore and I want him to quit being mean. It's not fair because you and mommy weren't mean to him first – you're never mean."

"We're not mad at him buddy," Bianca assured him, unable to resist pulling the boy into a gentle hug as she searched her brain for the right words to make him feel better even if it meant lying out her ass. "Your dad just got upset last weekend and…"

"But he said that my mommy wasn't my mommy anymore," AJ said into her hair as his arms gripped more firmly around her neck, and Bianca knew instantly that he was more scared than any of them had realized so she tightened her grip as well. "That was scary when he said that. He's not going to take me away from my mommy is he?"

"No AJ," Bianca choked out. "Your dad loves you and he just said that because he was angry at your mom and me. Your mom will always be in your life – I _promise._"

AJ pulled away and looked at her with tears gathering in the corners of his eyes which he quickly wiped away. "I don't want to go back to my daddy if he's going to keep yelling and being mean," he confessed. "I hoped that when he came tonight that everything would be okay again."

Bianca pulled him back in. "Your dad is going to be just fine buddy, I know it. He sounded to me like he was happier too and so I think tomorrow everything will be better."

AJ nodded against her shoulder. "You promise?"

And with that Bianca couldn't find it in her to further the lies, unsure if any of the ones she'd told already would come back to bite her. She pulled away and peered intently into his hopeful green eyes. "Buddy I can't promise anything like that but what I can do is assure you that your mom and I are going to do everything in our power to make sure that your dad's okay. We don't him to be mean or angry anymore either and I know how much he loves you and wants to see you. So that's what we're going to do – we're going to look out for him and for each other, no matter what."

"Because we're a family?" AJ asked, and Bianca's tears finally broke free as she nodded.

"Exactly. Because we're a family."

AJ smiled brightly at that. "Hey what if we make sure daddy knows that he's a part of our family too?" he suggested buoyantly. "Maybe if he sees how happy we all are together and if he's a part of it then it will help him to not be mad anymore!"

"That's a good idea buddy," Bianca replied, mentally going over the likelihood of it working and quickly thinking _Yeah right._

"Really? Because how could anybody not be happy if they're a part of our family? Our family rocks!"

"Yeah – our family rocks!" Bianca agreed heartily as she stood again, and AJ zoomed forward and hugged her around the waist and she kissed the top of his head.

"Thanks Bianca – you're the best."

"No AJ you're the best," she told him. "Now what would you say to going over to Kendall's to play with Spike and Ian and the girls for the night? Your mommy and I are going to go on a date."

AJ's nose scrunched. "A date?" he asked, mulling over the word for a bit. "I guess that's something that you're going to do now that you're a couple huh?"

"Yeah, that's pretty much what that means," Bianca laughed. "Is that a problem?"

"No… it's just I was kind of hoping for all of us to hang out in the fort tonight. You know – as a family. But going to Kendall's will be fun too. Can I take my monster truck so I can play with Spike?"

"Absolutely. Go ahead and run upstairs and get it while I go get the girls ready."

And with that AJ darted up the kitchen stairwell and Bianca was left alone in the silence of the kitchen.

/

"You do realize though," Bianca was saying to Marissa as the two of them drove back to Wildwind after dropping the kids at Kendall's, "that if JR hadn't been on his way back here and date night was going to be a go that I would have ditched you the second that AJ suggested a family night in the fort right? Because something about that little boy's crooked grin is literally impossible to say no to."

"Oh please," Marissa scoffed as she waved a hand. "I would have ditched you before you would have even had the chance. No one knows that kid's persuasive powers better than I do."

"Well that will also have to be on the agenda sometime soon," Bianca smiled at her, and Marissa reached for her hand across the center console and winked at her.

"Absolutely," she agreed. "But – you know… maybe we'll set that up _after_ date night."

"Agreed," Bianca said happily, forcing her eyes to stay on the road instead of drifting over to the redhead and the pair drove the rest of the way in silence, both content to simply be there together holding hands and knowing that whatever JR's arrival would bring might kill their mood but never their connection.

/

_6:56,_ Bianca silently checked her watch before peeking out from her hiding place. _I'm still not sure this whole hiding thing isn't overkill,_ she thought as she held the bushes back so she could see out, glancing across the driveway where she saw Marissa doing the same thing from her place behind some shrubs and they smiled at one another as Bianca took a deep breath. She and Marissa had discussed their plan and agreed that they should keep their presence unknown to JR so he wouldn't spook and run away. But without AJ there as bait Bianca still wasn't sure that the man wouldn't bolt at the first sign of something amiss; she only hoped that he would snoop around for his son and put enough distance between him and his car that they could stop him from getting away.

_Oh Jesus I really hope he's not driving,_ she went on darkly, her eyes trained on the opened gate at the bottom of the drive. _If he's still drunk – which more than likely will be the case – then let's hope he gets here at all._

From across the driveway Marissa checked her cell phone for the time and her stomach flip-flopped as she watched it turn to seven o'clock. Her head jolted up again and she squinted down the darkened drive, working to steady her breathing and tame her tumultuous stomach, neither of which was working too well. She glanced over to where Bianca was hiding and felt a little of her anxiety subside at the all too striking picture of her girlfriend's concentrated face, and once again she exhaled a sad sigh that this nonsense had spoiled their date.

_I'm going to kick that lousy slime bag right in the nuts with the point of my heels,_ she thought savagely, her anger flaring again at the mental image of what she expected to see once JR finally showed up. _That way he won't be able to have any more kids who he can disappoint with homophobia and drinking and anger. I can't believe I was ever in love with that man. Well I'm certainly more in love with Bianca than I ever was with him, so that's something…_

_That's everything actually,_ she sighed as she continued to allow her eyes to drift over to Bianca, who looked both stunning and adorable with her hair askew from the bush she was hiding in and her eyebrows furrowed in intense concentration. _She literally dropped everything to take care of me today and on top of that she evidently forgot about getting the call from Reese. Well – after this whole thing is over I might just have a few choice words for that woman. I'll take care of the woman I love as well as the daughters that witch abandoned. There is no greater dishonor or shame in doing something so horrendous, and for a job? Bullshit. It's utter and total bullshit._

_Just like me crouching behind this rose bush waiting for my drunk ex-husband to show up so we can ambush him. Jesus my life is such a soap opera…_

And then she heard a faint crunch from down the drive and she ripped her eyes from Bianca to the open gate. A car was inching through incredibly slowly, a black Jaguar with tinted windows and the headlights off, and Marissa's breath caught painfully as she watched it wind its way up the drive. She slinked back as far as she could without losing sight of the car and instinctively glanced back at Bianca, now barely visible behind the bush but their eyes met and Marissa tried to smile reassuringly but her lips were suddenly dried shut and she had to turn away.

After what felt like an eternity the Jaguar finally pulled over to the far side of the driveway in front of the garage and the engine died, and Marissa waited with a chest full of stale held breath and her eyes began to water from keeping them open so long, but it was an agonizingly long wait – at least three minutes – before the driver's door finally opened. Marissa saw the black leather loafer and immediately recognized it as JR's, her skin crawling as his disheveled blonde hair appeared above the door and he stumbled out, his black trench coat flying open revealing a black button-down and black slacks.

_Oh really nice JR,_ Marissa fumed, resisting the urge to charge forward right then. _Dress all in black and drive your black car with the lights turned off so no one will see you. I can't fucking believe it…_

JR staggered clumsily away from the car but left the door open, the light from the cabin the only thing illuminating his way and it cast the long shadow of his awkward outline in the direction of where Marissa stood hidden and it was immediately clear that he had obviously drained a bottle of whiskey before coming and the thought of him stumbling forward with the expectation of greeting their son and possibly driving away with him ignited an inferno of blazing fury in Marissa's chest, whose hands started to shake as she clamped her jaw so tightly closed that she could hear the blood rushing in her ears.

"AJ?" JR slurred quietly, tottering around the front walk in search of the boy. "Hey buddy where are you?"

He turned slowly around and glanced back at the car, and Marissa caught Bianca's eye and nodded. Both women stood.

"AJ's not here," Marissa said as evenly as her anger would allow as she stepped out onto the pavement, and JR whipped around so quickly that he nearly toppled over in his drunken stupor. He regained his balance though and his gaze connected with his ex-wife's, but before she had a chance to stop him he had whirled around again and took off back toward his car but Bianca had beat him there. The driver's door slammed shut as she placed herself between the charging drunkard and the car, and JR was only barely able to stop himself and once again nearly fell over with the effort.

"Nice to see you actually made it here considering the copious amount of Jack Daniels' you undoubtedly indulged in earlier," the brunette told him pointedly with her arms crossed in front of her chest. JR turned back toward Marissa who was advancing on him, wishing suddenly that she'd thought to bring a baseball bat along with her.

"I'm not drunk," JR tried futilely, his words so garbled together and they could barely understand him. "I'm just here to see my son. Where's AJ?"

"AJ's not here," Marissa repeated, stopping herself a mere five feet in front of the man. "There's no way in hell I'm going to allow him to see his father in such a pathetic state. How dare you do this to him. Again."

"Me?" JR roared, taking a step forward but Marissa didn't falter; she held her ground. "I'm not the one who just tore apart our family! I'm not the one who decided to run out on what that kid deserves!"

"AJ deserves a stable loving home JR, and that's exactly what I plan on giving him," Marissa countered, working to keep her own voice down. "You on the other hand? Do you think that showing up like this, wasted off your ass and barely able to stay on your own two feet, is better than what I'm doing for him?"

JR exhaled slowly and closed the distance between them until they were mere inches apart, clearly trying to intimidate the redhead but she was too hyped up on her righteous feeding anger to back down. "Where is my son?" he demanded quietly, and Marissa nearly gagged at the cloud of whiskey that erupted from his mouth. "You are not going to keep my son away from me."

"No but I might," came a booming voice from behind them, and JR's eyes shot up to the front door where Tad Martin had just appeared. From the darkened doorway behind him stepped Scott Chandler, Ryan Lavery, and Krystal Carey, who all marched forward and flanked Tad's shoulders with matching determined scowls. "Marissa might want to keep you in AJ's life but I promise you JR – if you start this again and if you keep it up then she will most certainly be the least of your problems."


	12. This is Kinda Forever

**Okay – super sincere apologies for the delay but real life came back at me with a vengeance this time. A sudden death in the family coupled with a move postponed my ability to get through this chapter but luckily I found some down time here and was able to finish. Hopefully things will slow down for a minute and I can keep going.**

**That said, I'm kind of blasting my way through this whole episode with JR. Truth be told I think the thing needs work but I lack the energy for it and so I'm moving on. I want to refocus on Bianca and Marissa without JR constantly butting in and ruining everything. My own fault, I understand, and I am now rectifying it.**

**Anyway, hope you enjoy the latest installment and please forgive what I believe to be a brush-by of what **_**could**_** have happened. I'm trying not to turn JR into a monster just so the lesbians will win out. I do believe there's a happy medium in there somewhere and I'm looking for it, although my lack of knowledge on the background history is tripping me up. Just another thing I'm looking to remedy.**

**Whatevs. Onward again.**

_**This is Kinda Forever**_

JR slowly lowered his gaze from the four on the front stoop back to meet Marissa's, his eyes nearly disappearing behind thin slits. "So you're ambushing me?" he breathed softly, and this time Marissa held her breath as he spoke to avoid being knocked over by the stink of alcohol.

"Were you planning on kidnapping my son?" she asked him squarely, and she noticed his jaw tighten as he glanced nervously upward again.

"No – I just wanted to see him," he said slowly, but Marissa shook her head.

"Bullshit JR. You called AJ at school today so I wouldn't know it and told him to meet you out here alone. If you weren't planning on running off with him then what was your plan exactly?"

"I just wanted to see him okay?" JR responded, obviously working not to slur his words but failing miserably, but Bianca scoffed and stepped forward.

"Oh yeah?" she challenged him. "Then explain to us why you told him he didn't have to go to school tomorrow. Or why you told him not to tell anyone that you were coming back early. And don't feed us the same bullshit you fed him about wanting to 'surprise' us because we all know that's a load of crap."

"I did want to surprise you," JR sneered over his shoulder as he watched Tad and the others approach. They all stopped just behind Marissa and Bianca made her way over as well and took her hand. JR glared down at their embrace and smirked darkly. "Kind of like how you two surprised me with your little announcement. Have you told anyone else?" he asked before returning his attention to the four behind them. "Have you boys heard the 'happy' news yet?"

Tad and Scott both nodded slowly while Ryan looked briefly confused before seeing Bianca and Marissa's clasped hands. He raised his eyebrows and then grinned. "Well I guess I know now," he said lightly, tapping Bianca playfully on the shoulder. "Good for you. Greenlee thought maybe there was something going on. Right on."

"Shut the hell up Lavery," JR thundered suddenly as he took a clumsy step forward but before he got far both Scott and Tad were right in front of him. "Get the hell off me!" he bellowed as Tad tried to grab his shoulder, shrugging him off violently and nearly careening backward. Tad and Scott merely stood back as he attempted to regain his balance but the copious amount of whiskey in his bloodstream prevented him from finding his equilibrium and he toppled over backward.

_Jesus Christ he looks so pathetic,_ Marissa thought sadly as she watched him hit the pavement, and when he tried to get up too quickly he stepped on the bottom of his long trench coat and crashed back down again. Tad walked over and tried to help him up but he smacked his hands away and opted to stay where he was, and for a long moment the six of them stood in silence and watched JR wallow around on the ground as he repeatedly tried to stand. After a few failed attempts he finally just sat still, slumping forward with his eyes closed and his breathing heavy. Tad knelt down in front of him and sighed deeply.

"Look at yourself JR," he said gently, and JR's angry eyes lifted up again. "Do you really want AJ to see you like this? So completely wasted that you can't even stay on your feet? What did you plan on doing tonight? Did you really plan on driving off with your son in the car? Because if you did then…"

"I don't know what my plan was," JR admitted quietly, his voice low with shaking anger as he glared past Tad toward Bianca and Marissa. "I wanted to see my son. I'm not going to let that two-timing bitch keep him away from me."

"Whoa JR, easy," Tad said, but Marissa had already stepped forward.

"It was never in my plan to keep AJ away from you," she told him firmly while JR scoffed. "Had you gone to Paris and taken care of business like you should have and then come home sober then I would have been glad to let him see you. But there's no way I'm going to let that boy see you like this. It would devastate him to know that you're drinking again."

"And why do you think I'm drinking again?" JR rumbled, and this time Scott chimed in.

"Because you're a spineless pathetic asshole who runs to the bottle every time something doesn't go his way," he said, and JR tried to jump to his feet but never made it past his knees before plummeting back down on his butt again. Scott shook his head. "See? Pathetic."

"Are you really drinking just because of Bianca and Marissa?" Tad asked him, but JR merely glared at him. "I can't believe that JR. You two haven't been together for a long time now so there's no reason why her being with Bianca should affect you like this."

"She ran out on our family!" JR yelled vehemently. "We were going to put our family back together and she ran out on us!"

"And who broke our family apart in the first place?" Marissa challenged him angrily. "You did JR. The only reason why we had to put it back together is because you broke it. But I quickly realized that it just wasn't fixable. You and I were never going to work."

"How do you know that if we don't at least try?" JR asked, and Marissa was sure she caught the low dip in his voice as his face fell, the change of expression almost impossible to see and she wasn't sure if she was making it up but she thought she saw his face soften slightly as his eyes rose to look at her. "How do you know that we can't get back everything we used to have? Remember how happy we were? Don't you want that back again? Remember how happy AJ was when you moved back in? How could you just run out again like that? Please Marissa – I'm sorry about the other day and if I could take it back I would. I promise I'll call Bruce and have him help Scott with the gatehouse. I promise I'll try to be a better man for you. I love you. I want you back and I want us all to be happy again. I want my son to have a happy home. Please… please Marissa…"

Marissa hated to admit it but listening to JR mumble in his drunken daze started to pull lightly at her heart and she glanced over at Bianca who had a strange expression on her face, and Marissa immediately recognized what it was and wanted nothing more than to wipe her apprehension away. She squeezed her hand briefly and then released it before making her way slowly over to where JR sat hunched on the ground, clearly so far gone that he wouldn't have admitted all those things otherwise. He certainly would never have ended up basically begging her had he been sober and she was duly aware of it as she knelt down next to him. As his face lifted toward hers her heart softened even more at his hopeful expression and she took a deep breath as she calculated her words.

"JR," she began slowly, and as he blinked up at her she knew that it was time to quit fighting anger with anger. "I do remember how happy we were. I do remember what it was like to be a family with you and AJ and for a long time I really thought that's what I wanted. But then I realized that you and I were never going to be what we should have been, because no matter how much I loved you or how much you loved me it was never right. We were forcing it. It was always too hard because we had to work so hard to stay happy. That's not how it should be. That's not what a true family is. That's the real reason why I left – I didn't want to keep modeling that for AJ. I want him to know how easy and unforced it can be, and I still believe that you can be a part of that. But we're not going to be together. We can't JR. We're not right and I'm just not in love with you anymore. I still care about you and I want us to raise AJ together. I want us to be able to do that because I think that's what AJ deserves. He deserves you, because you're an amazing dad to that amazing little boy and you know it. But this – this drunken stumbling slurring JR that I'm looking at is not that guy. That's the only reason why AJ's not here. He wants to see you and he should see you, but not like this."

JR stayed silent as he spoke but as soon as she said she didn't love him anymore his eyes immediately drifted back to Bianca, but surprisingly he didn't glare her down. He let his gaze fall to the ground and he breathed evenly until she finished, after which he sat silently for a long moment. Finally he said, "I want to see AJ tomorrow."

Marissa nodded slowly. "First tell me what you were planning tonight JR. The black clothes, the creeping in, the phone call to AJ at school and telling him to keep it a secret… If you weren't planning on running off with him then tell me what you were going to do. You owe me that."

JR sighed heavily and clenched his teeth. "I didn't want anybody to know I was in town because I knew you would throw a big fit about the fact that I'm drunk. Staying drunk in Paris helped me forget about you but it didn't make me forget AJ. I missed him and wanted to hear his voice so I called him. I told him he didn't have to go to school tomorrow because I really wanted to spend the day with him, and I brought a bunch of new French video games back for him that we could play together. That's it."

"Really?" Marissa asked, not really buying the whole story but the look in JR's eyes was more genuine than she'd seen in a while and she realized that in his drunken stupor they'd somehow managed to tap into a place he rarely visited, leaving him quite emotionally exposed.

JR sighed heavily and looked down again. "I admit that I thought about trying to take him away from you but you're right – you're his mom. The look on his face in the park last weekend broke my heart and I know I scared him and I'm sorry for that. I still hate what you've done and I won't tell you I'm happy for you or support you but you are his mother. I just want my time with him. He'll need a strong male influence – especially now. You may think you're a lesbian now but a boy needs a father."

"I never said he didn't," Marissa said, working to hold on to her compassion but she felt it dissipating at his backhanded attacks, but suddenly Bianca's voice cut in.

"Do you know what AJ told me this afternoon JR?" she asked him as she came to stand behind Marissa, but JR only glared up at her. "He told me that he wanted you to quit being mean and that maybe if you were part of our family that it would help. He wants you to be happy JR, and his solution to that was to include you. He wants you in his life because he loves you but he can see how unhappy you are. If you want AJ to be happy then you're going to have to get over this little flare of spiteful homophobia because we all know that's not really how you believe. Would it really have hurt you any less if Marissa had fallen for another guy?"

JR didn't respond but his jaw tightened again and Marissa rose to stand by her girlfriend. "My falling in love with Bianca has nothing to do with you and she's absolutely right – it would have been no different had I fallen for a guy. But I didn't – I fell for Bianca and you're going to have deal with that if we have any hope of co-parenting our son. But first you've got to clean yourself up again. It's only been a few days but for an alcoholic I don't think it really matters, but I still believe that you can bounce back from this and overcome it. AJ is dying to see you so if you want to see him then come over tomorrow night for dinner and show up sober. If you do – and I think you will – then we'll talk about how we're going to handle this. Those are the conditions. Can you deal with that?"

It took JR over a minute to respond but finally he nodded his head. "I need a ride home," he whispered, and Tad immediately stepped forward.

"I came with Krystal so I'll drive your car back to the mansion," he said as he walked over to help him to his feet. "I'll stay with you tonight too to make sure you're okay. I have a feeling that you're going to get sick from all the alcohol pretty soon."

Tad tried to pull JR up but he was quickly becoming nothing more than a languid lump and so Ryan and Scott came over to help and among the three of them they managed to stand JR upright. Tad scooped him under the arm and supported him as they stumbled back to JR's car, and as he loaded him inside Krystal came over and hugged Marissa tightly.

"Well that certainly could have gone worse," she said with a relieved chuckle, and Marissa and Bianca both nodded their agreement. "I think you handled that very well considering who you were dealing with. Maybe you've finally knocked some sense into that thick skull of his."

"I can only hope," Marissa sighed as she turned to Ryan and Scott. "Thank you guys so much for coming to help. I just thought that we could use a little more man power but I'm glad that we didn't really need it. But thanks anyway – it means a lot."

"Anytime," Scott said as he hugged both women in turn. "I know how crazy JR can get sometimes and I have to say he actually surprised me tonight. Let's just hope he keeps his promises and cleans up his act."

"I think he will," Tad said as he walked back over, and through the open driver's door Marissa saw JR completely passed out in the passenger seat. Tad gave her a quick hug. "If there's one thing that can keep JR from spiraling out of control it's AJ. I think the thought of being a good influence on him will pull him out of this. He just went typical Chandler for a minute, but his mother's side will win out this time I think."

"I really hope so," Marissa replied, and as Tad walked back to the car he waved to Krystal and Scott who were both walking to their own cars where they'd parked them out of sight behind the garage. Ryan walked up behind Bianca and put an arm around her.

"So – that was fun," he said sarcastically and Bianca couldn't help but chuckle as she gave him a gentle hug. "You girls really know how to invite a guy over for an eventful evening."

"Don't say we don't know how to entertain," Marissa smirked, watching as Tad turned JR's black Jaguar around and headed down the drive.

"Well I guess I'll head over to Kendall's to pick up Greens and Emma," Ryan said lightly. "You guys gonna follow me to pick up the kids?"

"Um – tell Kendall we'll be there in a little while," Bianca told him with a quick glance at Marissa. "I think we need to talk a little before we get the kids. I'll call her in a bit."

"Yeah but tell Greenlee thanks for backing up Kendall with the kids tonight," Marissa added. "I really didn't know what JR had planned so…"

"Please, no need to explain when it includes JR," Ryan said with a casual wave. "We were happy to help. And congratulations to you two. You seem pretty happy and I guess Greenlee was right… I hate it when that happens."

"Well still – thanks so much," Bianca chuckled, wrapping an arm around Marissa's waist as she led them back inside. She held the door open for her and they stepped into the darkened foyer, neither moving to find the light switch as they faced each other in the silent house. Bianca's eyes found Marissa's and she lifted a hand to stroke her cheek, silently willing her, encouraging her, to let her strong façade crack open and to let whatever terror or relief she felt fall out.

Marissa swallowed a few times and Bianca watched the delicate dip of her chin, yearning to bend forward to place gentle kisses there but she knew that it wasn't the time; she could see in Marissa's spectacularly sad eyes that she needed nothing more than for Bianca to simply stand there with her until she could release all that she'd held in since hearing about JR, and as she sniffed quietly the tears finally began to build and Bianca pulled her in close, enveloping her in her arms as she felt the first sob shake through her love's chest. She stroked her hair, she silently soothed her, she pressed every ounce of love and devotion she had inside her outward so that Marissa could feel it, so that she would know that nothing would keep her from standing there with her inside her arms until she felt past the fear and anxiety and – hopefully – reached release.

/

"Hey how'd it go?" Kendall asked as she opened the front door for Ryan. "That didn't take as long as I expected."

"No it actually went better than I think anyone anticipated," Ryan replied, watching as Greenlee approached from the dining room where the kids sat playing a board game.

"So JR wasn't drunk?" she asked, but Ryan shook his head.

"Oh no he was definitely wasted," he informed them, and both Kendall and Greenlee groaned loudly. "He just wasn't as angry or violent as they expected him to be. At least not by the end."

"What does that mean?" Kendall questioned him. "Wasn't he there to try to kidnap AJ?"

"Not according to him, no," Ryan explained as they all sat down in the living room. "He told Marissa that he just wanted to see AJ and that he didn't want him to tell because he knew they'd be mad that he was drunk. I think that's a crock of bull, but Marissa seemed to buy it. Especially after the pitiful bit of begging he did telling her how in love with her he is and how he wants them to be a family again. I thought it just sounded like a drunk pleading for something he doesn't deserve but Marissa seemed a lot less angry afterward."

"Well what did she say? Okay wait – walk us through from the beginning," Kendall requested, and Greenlee nodded her agreement.

Ryan sighed and started from the time that he had followed Bianca and Marissa from Kendall's to Wildwind after dropping the kids and repeated as much as he could remember up until Tad drove away with the passed out JR, and by the end both women next to him sat with their eyes wide and their mouths open slightly. Greenlee let out a low whistle.

"Well I guess that did go better than expected," she said. "Although maybe still not what you want."

"How did Marissa seem after they left?" Kendall asked curiously, wondering if seeing her ex in such a state had taken a deeper toll on her than she had showed. "And Bianca for that matter. Did they seem okay?"

"Well they both looked a little shaken but more relieved than anything," Ryan responded honestly. "There was a definite edge to Marissa when we got back to Wildwind but it seemed do ease after it was all over, but really the thing I noticed most was how they were leaning on each other. JR might be pissed off about it but those two are definitely a couple."

"They certainly are," Kendall agreed heartily, smiling to herself at the image of her sister so completely happy. "I only wish that JR wouldn't keep barging into Bianca's life and screwing it up every time she finds a little happiness. And Marissa too. He's done enough to her without making her feel guilty about sending him back into the bottle and trying to kidnap her kid. It's appalling."

"Well she handled herself well if you ask me," Ryan said with a tired sigh. "Her response to JR's begging was pretty classy considering the state he was in."

"Yeah if it was me I think I would have called the cops and had him arrested for driving drunk," Greenlee chimed in. "That probably would have taken care of him trying to kidnap AJ ever again."

"Well I'm glad that they had the sense to bring AJ over here so he wouldn't have to see that," Kendall added, glancing back toward the dining room where an eruption of laughter had just sounded. She smiled as she saw AJ high-five Spike. "Are they on their way to pick them up now?"

"Uh no Bianca said they needed to talk first," Ryan told her. "She said she'd call you in a little while."

Kendall sat back and brought her hand to her chin in thought, and after a moment she reached for her phone.

"Yeah I'll bet they want to 'talk'," Greenlee chuckled quietly, and Ryan nudged her. "What? You know that what they're doing is engaging in a little raunchy relieved quickie sex before picking up the kids. You know that's what's happening. Don't call her Kendall – you'll interrupt."

"You're disgusting," Kendall chided her lightly. "And I'm not calling her. I'm just texting her and telling them to take their time. The kids are fine anyway and plus they think they're on a date. It would be weird if they showed up so soon."

Greenlee had to nod in agreement and got up to rejoin the kids and Ryan followed while Kendall finished her text message.

"_Take your time Binx. The kids are doing great. So glad to hear it went okay and tell Marissa she's earned a fan. Love you guys."_

She hesitated only briefly before hitting the send button, resigning herself to the fact that Marissa Tasker was there to stay and so was her son and it was about time she welcomed them. She was smiling widely as she returned to the laughing party in the dining room.

/

It took Marissa a little over ten minutes before she found her voice again, the raging whirlpool of conflicting emotions she felt difficult to contend with and so she took comfort in the very best thing she'd ever known – Bianca – and simply allowed herself to stand there and silently cry it out while her love's arms held her tight and didn't move. Bianca didn't speak or try to reassure her; she didn't launch into all the reasons why JR was a filthy scumbag and she didn't demand that Marissa talk to her. She only held her, provided a warm shoulder where she could rest her head while she dampened her shirt with her tears, and loved her silently while she grieved.

And Marissa was grieving, to nobody's surprise but her own. Seeing JR in such a miserably low state had affected her in different ways than she had expected, and yet unsurprisingly it had nothing to do with sympathy or regret or compassion for the man who she had once believed she loved. Her pain was deeper than that and centered solely on the only good thing that JR had ever given her – AJ – and thoughts of how he would react if his beloved father didn't manage to clean himself up again. Because in spite of all that Marissa had told him in the moment she still wasn't convinced of anything; she didn't trust JR not to revert back to baseless homophobia out of sheer anger; she didn't trust him not to fill AJ's head with senseless lies out of spite; and most importantly she didn't trust him not to try to take AJ from her, no matter what he had said about her being his mother. She'd trusted him too many times before and been burned, and she knew better than to believe anything that came out of an alcoholic's mouth while inebriated.

And on top of all of that she was almost crushed by the billowing relief that JR hadn't succeeded in whatever he'd tried to do. Even if his plan wasn't to run off with AJ he still intended on talking to him so unbearably drunk that you could barely understand his slurred and throaty speech, and the thought that he presumed that to be okay reignited her ever-present rage at the man. But the devastating horror at the mere idea of AJ disappearing from her life nearly doubled her over in pain, and it was only Bianca's strong arms around her back that held her upright as a rattling sob rocked through her as AJ's pure blissful incredible face filled her mind.

Bianca moved only enough so that she could gently kiss her cheek, pressing her lips firmly against her skin and Marissa clamped her eyes tightly shut as more tears spilled from them and her hands instinctively clung tighter to her back. "Shhhh…" Bianca breathed as she smoothed down flowing red hair. "It's all going to be okay. AJ's safe and everything's going to be fine. I'm right here. I've got you."

And boy did she ever have her. Marissa pulled away only far enough to look at her girlfriend's impossibly beautiful eyes and once again a giant lump rose into her throat as wave after wave of crashing love washed over her. She was suddenly transfixed with those deep chocolate eyes, absolutely powerless to look away, and as if an invisible hand had reached into her chest and scooped out her heavy heartache she felt herself lighten under her gaze, knowing with paralyzing certainty that everything Bianca was saying was true simply because it was Bianca who was saying it. And most of all the thing that made Marissa's heart rate jump up to an almost alarming level was the endlessly deep, boundless and miles-wide love and adoration that resounded back to her, burning through Marissa's skin until she could feel it in her nerves. It set her arms on fire; it made her limbs feel as though they'd just awoken from sleep. It made her feel Bianca over every inch of her body until she was left staring, wide-eyed and awed, at the only person she'd ever truly loved.

A smile settled on her lips despite her tears and Bianca squinted at her, returning the gesture with a charming hint of confusion. "What?" she asked quietly, and Marissa's only response was to lean forward to capture her mouth with her own for a searing kiss and both women watched the fireworks explode behind their eyelids as they sank into one another, fingers tangling into hair as they tugged each other closer.

_Bianca…_ Marissa thought inside the foggy eruption of love and desire, and as Bianca's arms grasped her waist and lifted her up she responded by wrapping her legs around her, allowing herself to be carried through the living room while steadfastly refusing to break away from her kiss.

_Marissa…_ filled Bianca's mind as she carried her across the room, at first intending to get them upstairs but she knew she'd never make it so instead she eased them both down onto the couch, taking special care to move slowly and smoothly and as she settled down on top of her lover they unknowingly shared the same muddled thought;

_Heaven._

/

A little more than an hour later the couple laid together on the floor in the living room, wedged between the couch and the coffee table wrapped up easily together as they gazed silently upward at the vaulted ceiling. Bianca twirled a loose strand of Marissa's hair around her fingers while Marissa absently traced the outline of Bianca's belly button, and after a minute the brunette inhaled sharply and giggled.

"That tickles," she whispered, and Marissa smiled and begrudgingly stopped her repeating path.

"Sorry," she replied as she nuzzled into Bianca's neck who sighed contentedly in response, her arms coming back around to her back as she pulled her in and Marissa brought her gaze upward and their eyes met, a pair of matching smiles reflecting one another.

After a long moment of gaping at the magnificent woman in her arms Bianca finally let her smile fade into seriousness in spite of her desire to keep staring. "So do you want to talk about JR?" she asked diffidently, and Marissa's response was exactly as she expected.

Her smile melted away and the angry lines reappeared in her eyes. "Not really, but I guess we should."

"Look I know how you must feel right now Riss but the truth is that it went better than I think either of us expected," Bianca assured her. "We expected him to show up smashed but still I know actually seeing it must have been hard, but really Riss – he could have reacted a lot more harshly than he did."

"Did you believe what he said about not wanting to take AJ?" Marissa asked quietly, and Bianca thought for a minute before replying.

"I want to," she told her with a long sigh. "Truthfully I don't think we'll know for sure until he proves it."

Marissa nodded slowly. "Well I think I'm still going to go over our custody agreement, just in case. Something's telling me that part of the reason why he folded was because he was too drunk to react properly. That whole speech about wanting me back? I feel like that never would have come out of him had he been sober and I think he lost his resolve because he spiraled down." Bianca listened and nodded her agreement, but Marissa caught the edge of apprehension that returned to her eyes. "What?" she questioned, and when Bianca didn't respond she added, "Please baby. Tell me."

Bianca took a deep breath. "I don't want to make you think I don't trust you…"

Marissa's eyebrows furrowed at that. "Why would I ever think that?"

"Well… even I have to admit that when JR was talking about wanting to be a family with you again it tugged at my heart a little and I could see that it was doing the same to you. I know that's why when you responded you were much gentler with him. It just – I don't know. I guess I'm just petrified of losing you now that I know what it's like to have you and…"

"Bianca stop," Marissa interjected, placing a finger softly on her lips to silence her. She propped herself up on an elbow so that she could look at her properly and locked her gaze. "I am going to tell you this now, and I'll tell you every single day that comes after if I have to, but I am in this for the rest of my life. No one – _no one _– has ever made me feel the way you do. I have never loved more deeply or felt so much, and I've never been more positive of anything before. It's the easiest thing I've ever said actually, telling you that I plan on spending my life with you, because the terror that you feel about losing me is exactly how I feel about you. Probably even more. So don't worry because I'm not going anywhere. No amount of begging exes will ever pull me away from you. I know what I've got. This is kinda forever."

"Kinda forever huh?" Bianca asked, tears streaking into her hair and Marissa's tender hand wiped them away.

"Kinda," she told her as she leaned down to kiss her tenderly, and as she pulled away Bianca brushed back her falling hair and smiled.

"Perfect," she whispered. "You're perfect."

"I'm perfect for you," Marissa smirked. "I guess that's why we're so perfect together. Fucking perfect."

"Exactly," Bianca agreed, and Marissa watched her amusement transform into wonderment, the way it softened her eyes and smoothed her features and she gasped as yet another flood of adoration blanketed her. But she could tell Bianca had something else to say and so she waited in silence. "You know sometimes I still just can't seem to wrap my head around this," she said finally, tracing Marissa's jawline with her fingertips and the redhead hummed serenely and shivered. "I just can't seem to fathom the amount of happiness you bring me or how much I seem to love you. Or how incredibly lucky I am that you feel the same way about me. I've thought that I was happy before – more than once actually – but with you… now I know that I was never really happy before now because anything less than this just isn't good enough. You're better than every dream I ever had in my head and you're right – this is kinda forever. For the rest of our lives we'll be this happy as long as we're together."

"Absolutely forever," Marissa breathed, leaning down once more to claim lips that responded with fervor and before long they were lost in a repeat show of love, devotion, and – sometimes – a quiet, nearly inaudible chant of the other's name mixed with the three words neither would ever tire of hearing.


	13. Chapter 13

**Note:**

**This is an unfinished chapter written by the author Fantasinner, who sadly passed away on December 11 after losing a battle with a recurrent brain condition. Her fiancé is posting this last bit of her story for her in deference to her zest and passion for writing. I know how much she enjoyed this and the feedback she received was truly appreciated, especially now. To that end, I also realize that this story is unfinished and will remain that way as this is the last bit I could find on this story. However, I believe it would have been important to her that it be posted. All feedback and reviews are appreciated, and thank you so much to all of her readers.**

**And as I believe she would say… **

**Onward.**

_**Untitled**_

Something was buzzing. Bianca buried her face farther into her pillow and tried to block out the noise but it only seemed to grow louder. _I'm not answering that,_ she thought dully, but then realized that the constant sound was completely different from that of her cell phone. She managed to peel an eye open far enough to check the clock on the nightstand and groaned when she saw it read 5:44 am. She still had another 45 minutes to sleep so what the hell was making so much noise?

She rolled over and draped her arm over the lump in the covers next to her, but as her hand sank down almost to the mattress she realized that it was Marissa's pillow she was snuggling. She opened her eyes and looked around her bedroom, blinking rapidly against the sleep that stuck to them, but Marissa was nowhere in sight. And still the buzzing continued. _What is that? It sounds like a…_

She sat bolt upright in the bed and felt her eyes grow in their sockets, her smirk impossible to tame as amused thoughts ran rampant. _That totally sounds like a vibrator. And Marissa's missing. The bathroom door's closed and the light's on in there…_

She climbed out of bed and wrapped a robe around herself as she tiptoed toward the door, squinting through the darkness in the room at the thin sliver of light that leaked out from under the bathroom door and as she approached the buzzing grew louder as did her smile. _Oh my god Marissa has a vibrator!_ she thought wildly, a little torn about how she should react. _We haven't exactly gotten to the point where we're using toys yet but if Marissa already had one why wouldn't she tell me? And why is she in there using it all alone? I was just lying in bed naked for Christ sakes._

But as she reached for the door handle she couldn't keep her grin from widening at the prospect of walking in on Marissa that way and she hesitated only briefly before silently gripping the handle and turning it. She inched the door open slowly and peeked around it, and what she saw made her stop dead in her tracks.

Marissa sat on the counter in a thin silk robe with her head reclined against the wall and her eyes closed. One leg was propped up on the counter while the other hung down over the cabinet and in her mouth was

"An electric toothbrush?" Bianca said aloud, and Marissa's eyes sprang open and she nearly choked on the toothpaste. She leaned forward quickly and spit into the sink. "I didn't know you used an electric toothbrush," Bianca told her as she crossed the room, laughing inwardly at her own shock.

Marissa wiped her mouth and grinned. "Just one of the many interesting components that make me who I am," she told her, but seeing the amused expression on Bianca's face she furrowed her eyebrows in question. "Why what did you think I was doing?"

"Oh I don't know…" Bianca began slowly. "I was just lying in bed and all of the sudden I hear this buzzing that was definitely not my cell phone and you weren't in bed and the bathroom door was closed…"

"Because I didn't want to wake you," Marissa told her, catching on. She slid off the counter and wrapped her arms around Bianca's waist. "And I didn't want you to wake up to morning breath."

"You don't have morning breath," Bianca defended her. "And if you did I probably wouldn't notice."

"Even so, I wanted to be minty fresh for you," she replied, leaning up to kiss her gently. "But don't worry – I only use the vibrator when flossing."

Bianca's eyes widened again in shock. "You…" she started, but Marissa busted out laughing.

"I don't have a vibrator!" she exclaimed. "But you should see the look on your face! Priceless!"

"Well can you blame me for thinking that's what that noise was?" Bianca asked, which only doubled Marissa's laughter and Bianca was forced to join in. After a moment Marissa recovered and wrapped the brunette in her arms again.

"Don't worry baby," she told her happily, kissing each cheek. "Now that I have you in my life I really _really_ don't need one." Bianca grinned and kissed her again, but soon Marissa pulled back. "But if I do get one," she went on, her voice dropping an octave and Bianca swallowed, "you'll be the very first to know."

She dropped her arms and swished away from her, crossing the tile back to the door and Bianca stared after her, her jaw hanging down to the floor. "You would really consider…"

"If you play your cards right," Marissa said with a wink as she disappeared around the corner and Bianca watched the sway of her hips and realized she'd actually started drooling with her mouth hanging open and she bolted through the door after her.

/

"Bianca," Amanda's voice rang out from the intercom on her desk, jolting the brunette as she sat hunched over boring papers scattered across her desk. "I have Marissa Tasker on the line for you."

Bianca smiled and picked up the receiver. "Thanks Amanda I've got it," she told her as she connected the line.

"Well hello again beautiful," Marissa said before she could speak, and a wide smile immediately cut across her face. "How has your morning been?"

"Absolutely boring," Bianca told her with a heavy sigh, tossing her pen onto the largest pile of papers before her. "I've been scouring these legal claims for hours and now I've got a headache. There's just so much."

"Well bring them home with you and I'll have a look at them," Marissa suggested. "In fact you could even bring some with you to Krystal's for lunch…"

"Oh no," Bianca interrupted her. "The last thing I want to think about over lunch with you is work. I'll just bring them home later."

"Sounds like a plan," Marissa replied, and Bianca smiled as she pictured her girlfriend's grin on the other end of the line. "So other than that how's it going?"

"Uh well that's been pretty much my entire morning, unless of course you count watching the messenger boy hit on Amanda for about twenty minutes."

"Well it's about time something happened for her," Marissa started, but again Bianca cut her off.

"He was seventeen."

Marissa chuckled. "Oh well then maybe not. Still though, she ought to do something with herself you know."

"Preach it woman," Bianca agreed heartily. "I've been telling Amanda that ever since she started here but she's stubborn as a mule and too picky to be allowed. It's not my problem though. I have other things to worry about besides the romantic life of my assistant."

"Well speaking of other things to worry about, I actually have a little bit of news I thought you'd be interested to hear and I couldn't wait another hour until we met for lunch."

"Oh?"

"Um yeah," Marissa started, and Bianca heard the rustling of papers as she grew quiet and she sensed that her girlfriend was suddenly a bit nervous.

"Is it something to do with JR?" Bianca ventured cautiously. "Because I really thought he did okay last Friday when he came for dinner. Things were civil at the very least. He's not drinking again is he?"

"Oh no it has nothing to do with JR," Marissa told her slowly. "I um… well I was in the break room earlier and overheard a few of the attorneys talking and I'm pretty sure they were talking about Jack coming back into the office sometime this week. Have you heard from him or your mother since they left?"

Bianca thought for a minute. "No actually I haven't. I assumed they were just far too busy with their extravagant vacation to bother calling, although if Jack's coming back to the office then…"

"It would follow that Erica will be blowing back through town soon as well," Marissa finished for her, and Bianca knew exactly what she was thinking.

"Well if that's the case then I'm sure I'll hear from her soon, probably not until they're back in town though. If I know my mother then she'll want to set up some sort of grand entrance since they're coming back early. But don't worry babe – I'll tell her about us the first chance I get."

"I wasn't worried," Marissa told her confidently. "I just thought you might like a little heads up that your mom's on her way back."

"Uh huh," Bianca agreed, even though she knew that Marissa really had been worried, or at the very least apprehensive. "Look you don't have to worry baby, my mom loves you."

"Yeah now," Marissa fired back. "She loves the straight girl who's best friends with her daughter. When she finds out we're together then I'll likely become nothing more than the biological daughter of Krystal Carey and David Hayward and nothing will stop her from hating my guts on principle."

"Not true," Bianca assured her. "I'll make sure that doesn't happen."

Marissa laughed darkly. "Okay no offense but I don't think anyone, yourself included, really stands a chance against Erica Kane's opinions."

"Well then you're just not giving me enough credit," Bianca replied lightly. "Or yourself for that matter. Look – you're spectacular and I really think my mom will see that instead of the fact that your biological parents are two of the people she hates more than anyone. And besides, even if she does it won't matter – I'll still love you and her opinion be damned. This is kinda forever, remember?"

"Oh I definitely remember," Marissa told her with a soft sigh, and Bianca smiled widely. "You really think it'll be okay?"

"I think it will be just fine," Bianca tried to reassure her. "My mom hasn't liked any of my girlfriends in the past but then I've never been with anyone like you before. You'll hold your own against her if you have to, I'm positive of that."

"Thanks for the support baby," Marissa said quietly as she took a deep breath. "I guess I'm just really nervous. Dealing with the parents is never easy."

"Especially when you have a mom like mine," Bianca agreed with a chuckle. "But really I wouldn't worry about it. We'll tell her and then we'll move on. Whatever she says won't change anything, I swear."

"Well that makes me feel better even though I kind of already knew it. But still it's nice to hear."

"I'll tell you as many times as you need."

"Maybe just one more time then…"

Bianca drew in a deliberate breath. "Marissa I will be with you for the rest of my life regardless of my mother's opinion or anyone else's. This is absolutely forever and that's that."

"That's that," Marissa repeated, and Bianca heard her smile through the line.

"That's that."

/


	14. Chapter 14

**Note:**

**Hello. It's Fantasinner / Aya's fiancé again. I realize at first this update will seem completely unexpected so I'll briefly explain. I've spent quite a bit of time going through Aya's writing files. Most of them are password protected and her master file on her fanfiction writing was as well. It took me a while to guess the password so that I could get into it, and what I found was her entire story followed by over 25 pages of extra writing labeled "Future Chapters". After reading through it it became obvious that she had often written ahead of herself with the intention of including things. Most are just clips with no real ending or beginning but at the very bottom of the file I found one complete scene. It obviously takes place over a year after where the story is now. Apparently this was something she was building toward and who knows how long it would have taken her to get there. I just felt that the only thing to do is to post it. It's a wonderful scene, and almost personal to Aya. I hope it's enjoyed.**

**I'd also like to try, even though I know I'll fail, to express my deep gratitude for the wonderful and heartwarming things that have been written about Aya. It brings tears to my eyes every time I read through them. There are truly no words to thank you all for your kindness, and posting this very last scene is partly my way of trying to say thanks. It deserves to be read anyway, and especially by those who truly appreciate it. I know I really don't have the actual authority but I'm taking a little "fiancé's license" and dedicating this last post to anyone who has read this story, and especially to those who have taken something from it. My gratitude to you all, just knowing you're out there anywhere reading my beautiful love's words, is boundless.**

**And to luci465… you top the list.**

**Onward.**

**_Future_**

There was something about frost covered windows that did something to Marissa. Something about their sparkle as they caught the warmth from inside houses filled with joy and happiness made her feel like the ice collected there for the specific purpose of twinkling in at her, reminding her that the soft white blanket outside, while by concession extremely beautiful, waited in dampened silence without disturbing the cheerfulness inside the house; it merely lay and waited, glazing the frozen panes as a simple reminder that the warmth was inside, not out. As she stood in front of the expansive bay window peering through the snow laden glass she felt an involuntary smile creep to her lips and she relaxed into it while indulging in the sweet sounds of children's laughter from just behind her. On the left of the window the glowing lights of the Christmas tree reflected back at her and the blurry shapes of three little heads bobbed around in front of it, sizing and comparing the presents that lay beneath. She thought about turning around to watch them but decided against it, instead relishing the sounds mixed with the spectacular view through the window.

The backyard rolled in gentle snow blanketed hills until it met the snow topped trees behind it, the small pond at the edge of the property frozen into a solid block of ice and the glow of the clear moon illuminated the swooping cuts made from five pairs of ice skates. The fountain which in the summertime spewed sporadic plumes of dancing water sat still and spackled with the remains of launched snowballs, and had a fresh blanket of snow not fallen that evening then the deep trenches they had cut through it would have been visible until they reached the back porch, where five pairs of frozen boots huddled beside the door. The snowman they had built a few days prior had been destroyed in their snowball fight and lay in three heaping mounds in the middle of the yard, and Marissa laughed as she noticed the carrot nose jutting halfway out of the snow.

"Whatcha laughing about?" said a small voice from behind her and Marissa immediately recognized the hands that wrapped around her waist as Miranda's. She draped her arms around the girl and hugged her close while gesturing out the window.

"Our snowman's nose," she told her. "It's sticking straight up out of the snow from where you and AJ knocked it over earlier."

Miranda squinted through the glass and started giggling herself. "Oops. At least we remembered to bring in Uncle Jack's top hat."

Marissa nodded in agreement and went about gazing onto the yard, enjoying standing there with Miranda who was happy to join her in contended silence, the fuzzy fleece of her new onesy-pajamas so soft under her hands as she affectionately rubbed her shoulder. After a moment though her attention was caught by a small movement at the edge of the yard just inside the trees, and she gasped quietly as an enormous deer slowly emerged from the shadowed trees and cantered slowly out into the openness of the yard. From the size of the antlers Marissa could immediately tell that it was a buck and its graceful nobility took her breath away. It trotted slowly across the open ground, leaving delicate hoof prints in its wake, and soon the two girls saw another deer follow it from the trees, this time a doe of much smaller stature but still immeasurably stunning.

"Hey guys you've got to come see this," Marissa called over her shoulder. "Hurry!"

She heard the sounds of packages being dropped followed by the scurrying of tiny footsteps and soon AJ bumped gently into her other side as Gabby skidded around to stand in front of them. Bianca came up behind her and placed a warm hand on her shoulder. "What is it?"

Marissa only pointed. The buck and the doe were by then nearly halfway across the yard, meandering their way through the dense snow in the direction of the three piles that remained of the snowman. AJ pressed his face up against the glass to get a better view and the two younger girls followed suit.

"Oh look!" Gabby twittered excitedly a moment later, pointing enthusiastically back toward the trees where another deer was emerging. "It's the baby reindeer! It's a family!"

"Are those Santa's reindeer?" Miranda asked in a hushed tone just as the buck reached the carrot, and Bianca's heart swelled as she looked down at the top of her daughter's head and savored that even at eight years old she hadn't given up on believing in Santa Clause.

"I bet they are," AJ whispered, his green eyes widening as they all watched the buck begin to munch on his find. "The daddy is at least. He's beautiful. Just the kind of reindeer Santa would have."

"Which one do you think he is?" Gabby asked, her voice just barely loud enough to be heard over the intense hush that had fallen over the family. Her breath left a circle of fog on the glass and she hastily wiped it away with her sleeve.

"I don't know," Miranda answered. "But I hope he gets back to Santa before he has to leave tonight."

"I think he looks like Prancer," AJ supplied, and Miranda shot a questioning look his way.

"Why do you say that?"

"Dunno," AJ said with a shrug. "Just a guess."

"I think it's Donner," Gabby told them confidently, her pigtails swishing behind her as she nodded.

"You're just saying that because Donner's your favorite," AJ countered, and Gabby only replied with a shrug of her own. Marissa glanced behind her at Bianca whose eyes were alight with amusement, both women delighted to listen to their kids discuss the possibility of one of Santa's reindeer happening into their yard. AJ craned his head backward and addressed his mother. "Which one do you think he is mom?"

Marissa tilted her head to the side, sizing up the deer as she repeated the song in her head so she could remember the names. "Well I think he does kind of look like Prancer," she agreed after a moment. "But then I think maybe he looks like Blitzen to me."

"I think he looks like Comet," Bianca offered with a grin, and Marissa nodded at the suggestion.

"I think it's Dasher," Miranda said confidently, and Bianca draped her hand over Marissa's on her daughter's shoulder.

"Why's that Mimo?"

"Because he's so big," she explained with a glance backward at her mother. "Dasher's the one that's closest to the sleigh and so he'd have to be really big and strong to be able to pull it. Look at him – he's huge. And you can see how strong his legs are. That would be really important."

Both Marissa and Bianca had begun nodding their agreement as she spoke, and by the time she finished AJ and Gabby were as well. "That's really logical, Mimo," Marissa told her, impressed yet again by the girl's ability to sort through anything with logic and reason. "I bet that is Dasher."

"We should go give them more carrots," AJ suggested quietly as the baby deer finished off the last of the one they'd left, but Bianca sadly shook her head.

"We can't go out there or we'll scare them away buddy," she explained. "But we'll be sure to leave extras out tonight for Santa to give them."

"They're leaving anyway," Miranda whispered, and sure enough the little family were making their way slowly toward the trees and Bianca found it interesting that they each followed the same path back through the snow. After they disappeared she glanced down at the three children who still stood with their noses pressed against the glass and the little thrill that still hung in the air sent a shiver down her spine.

"That was amazing," Miranda said finally as she pushed away from the window and turned around. "I've never seen a reindeer that close before. That was so cool."

"Do you think they'll be back next year?" Gabby asked as she lifted her arms for Marissa to pick her up. The redhead scooped her into her arms and nodded.

"Maybe. Next year we should put a whole bunch of carrots out on the porch for them."

"Yeah!" AJ and Miranda agreed heartily.

"Maybe there will even be more next year," Miranda said hopefully, and Bianca beamed at her.

"That would great," she told her daughter with a warm smile. "We'll leave a whole bag out there for them next Christmas."

"Okay guys it's almost time for bed," Marissa said happily, spinning Gabby around which earned her a delighted giggle. "Everybody run upstairs and brush your teeth and then we'll meet down here in front of the fire. Got it?"

"Got it!" three excited voices exclaimed and Gabby leapt from her arms and bolted for the stairs behind the older kids. Bianca chuckled and wrapped her arms around Marissa's waist as she rested her head on her shoulder.

"Well that was kind of magical," she said quietly into her ear and Marissa hummed her agreement.

"I hope they all still believe in Santa next year just so we can camp out by the window and wait for reindeer," she said with a soft sigh. "I do believe we couldn't have picked a better place to build our house. You were right – being out here on the edge of town with all the trees has really paid off."

"Told you," Bianca replied as she kissed her cheek and pulled away to lead them to the couch. Marissa cuddled up next to her girlfriend and leaned back against her shoulder, sighing happily again as Bianca trailed soft kisses along her cheek. "Our first Christmas in our house," she whispered, and Marissa smiled as she closed her eyes.

"It's been perfect, even when your mom and Kendall got into it over the place-settings at dinner."

Bianca laughed. "Yeah that's an every year occurrence," she explained. "Kind of like a tradition. Only this year instead of Kendall defending her own table she was defending mine, which I kind of weirdly appreciated."

"Me too," Marissa agreed. "Only then I was left with your mom huffing around the kitchen while I was trying to cook."

Bianca kissed her forehead. "Sorry."

"Eh, the things you do for love."

The couple reclined in peaceful silence for a moment as they gazed serenely at the crackling fire, each warmed completely by the flames as well as the warmth of the other's arms wrapped around them.

After a moment Bianca lifted her head. "Have you heard from JR?"

Marissa sighed listlessly. "Yeah he called earlier from New York. Said he was too busy for me to get AJ but that he'd call tomorrow to talk to him. I'll believe that when I see it."

Bianca nodded. "Did AJ ask about him?"

"You know he's kind of stopped asking so much," Marissa told her, and once again Bianca nodded at information she'd already gathered herself. "Ever since he's started travelling so much and especially after we finally moved in here AJ just hasn't seemed as interested. But I could tell he was anxious today."

"Yeah he kept jumping at the phone every time it rang," Bianca supplied. "I could tell he wanted him to call."

"Well he'd better call tomorrow," Marissa said flatly, her tone carrying that hard edge that usually associated with her ex-husband.

Bianca kissed her head again. "I'm sure he will." Marissa glanced back at the brunette, her eyes squinting slightly as if weighing her decision to ask her next question but Bianca decided to just answer it for her. She shook her head slowly. "Reese won't call."

"Not even on Christmas?" Marissa asked hopefully, but Bianca only continued to shake her head.

"Well she didn't call last year so I don't expect a call this year. She hasn't sent a card or anything either. But at least this year I think Miranda and Gabby aren't thinking about it so much. And by the way I still think it's amazing that Gabby's calling you mommy now."

Marissa smiled and felt her heart swell before sinking again. "I never wanted to replace…"

But Bianca stopped her with a gentle finger to her lips. "Don't baby. She gave up that role and you happily stepped in. Truth be told you're a thousand times better at parenting my girls than Reese ever was. She's out of our lives by her own choice and both Miranda and Gabby now look to you where she used to be."

Marissa sighed heavily. "You know how much I love that," she began, unsure exactly where she was going. The subject of Reese had remained an understood off-limits topic ever since her disastrous visit the previous year, and still every time Marissa thought about it she still imagined Miranda's hurt and tear-streaked face as well as Bianca's anger and once again she relished the fact that she'd finally gotten to have her say with the woman. Still, she hated the abandonment that she knew Miranda still felt and had worked tirelessly to take it away or at least ease it, but she still noticed the tiniest flash of – pain? – in Miranda's eyes every time she heard her younger sister address Marissa as "mommy." She looked up into reassuring chocolate eyes and pressed forward. "I love Miranda and Gabby like they're my own, and I consider them to be mine now. I guess I just still wish that something could have been salvaged with Reese, for Miranda's sake at the very least. Gabby was really too young to understand but I know Miranda still struggles with it."

Bianca thought about it for a minute before responding. Finally she said, "You know I used to wish that too. I wanted Reese to stay in our daughter's lives for their sake, but after her behavior last year it all kind of changed for me. Reese didn't want a family; she wanted someone to come home to so she wouldn't feel lonely. You on the other hand want nothing more than to come home to our family, and this family in this house tonight is the only family I'll ever want or need. _You_ are my family. You and AJ and Mimo and Gabby. That's all that matters to me. I know Miranda still struggles but it's getting better, and that's because of you. She trusts you and she loves you and most of all she knows that you're not going anywhere."

"I'm not," Marissa breathed, and Bianca lifted her face so she could look at her.

"I wouldn't have it any other way," she assured her softly as she leaned in for a kiss, and the gentle hum of Marissa's happiness made her heart blaze in her chest. When she pulled away she rested her forehead against her girlfriend's and the two simply sat together for a while as they partook of one of their favorite pastimes – just smiling at one another.

After a long moment Marissa sat back and glanced up the stairs. "Where in the world are the kids?" she wondered. "It shouldn't take them this long just to brush their teeth."

Bianca raised her eyebrows and moved to pull herself off the couch. "I'll go check."

She wasn't gone thirty seconds before hurried footsteps bounded down the stairs with AJ in the lead, their annual Christmas Eve story book jammed under his arm as he flew over the last couple of steps and landed with a loud _thump_ on the carpet.

"Slow down buddy," Marissa laughed as he launched himself over the back of the couch and landed on the cushions next to her. Miranda and Gabby both skipped around it and settled themselves on the floor while AJ just grinned up at his mother with a sparkle of excitement in his green eyes and a wide grin on his face. "A little excited about Christmas are we?" she asked the three children, who all nodded vigorously. Marissa shook her head. "Okay well I understand that you're excited but you'd better calm down so you'll be able to sleep," she told them, trying not to sound too downer mommy, but all three kids were squirming nonstop in their anticipation. _Jeez did we give these kids one too many sugar cookies or something?_

"You heard her guys," Bianca told them as she reseated herself next to Marissa. She fixed them each with a stern look and Marissa sat back, deciding to let Bianca take over. "We all have to calm down if we're going to get any sleep. And you'll all need your rest so you'll have the energy to play with all your awesome new toys that Santa's going to bring you tonight. Remember?"

The three kids only nodded silently as Gabby stood up abruptly and climbed onto the couch between her parents, nestling herself snugly between the two women. Miranda sat up on her knees and tugged the book from under AJ's arm before resettling herself on a plush pillow on the floor near the fire. "Can I read the book this year mommy?"

Bianca nodded and smiled fondly at her daughter. "Of course Mimo," she told her happily. "In fact why don't we all go and snuggle up by the fire."

AJ immediately jumped up and started tossing the back cushions from the couch on the floor while Gabby darted off to collect blankets, and within just a few minutes the family of five were cuddled together on the warm carpet in front of the crackling fire. Before joining them Bianca shut off the lights, leaving only the Christmas tree and the fire to illuminate the room. She sank down on a pillow behind Marissa and the two reclined against the coffee table. AJ draped a blanket over their legs and then rolled up inside his own, cocooning himself into a cylinder of patchwork wool with blue fleece footies sticking out of one end. He rolled onto his stomach and propped himself up on his elbows, his full attention then focused on Miranda who sat to one side of the fireplace with the book open in her lap. Gabby scooted over and laid her head on Marissa's legs while her sister began to read.

"'Every Who down in Whoville liked Christmas a lot, but the Grinch, who lived just north of Whoville - did not,'" Miranda read from _How the Grinch Stole Christmas. _"'The Grinch hated Christmas - the whole Christmas season. Now, please don't ask why; no one quite knows the reason…'"

And on she read with her family enraptured, and to Marissa's extreme surprise all three of the kids – including notoriously dozy Gabby – stayed wide awake for the entire reading, Miranda's excitement only growing the closer she got to the end. _Well that's interesting,_ the redhead thought to herself as Miranda turned over to the last page of the book. _When we did this last year all three of them were snoring by halfway in. Good god we did give them too many sugar cookies after dinner…_

"'Christmas Day will always be just as long as we have we,'" Miranda rushed through the last lines. "'Welcome Christmas while we stand, heart to heart, and hand in hand.'" She shut the book with a quiet _pop_ of the pages and put it down on the hearth while AJ and Gabby both sat upright and twisted around on their butts so all three were looking at Bianca and Marissa.

"That was really nice Mimo," Bianca said. "You have a wonderful reading voice."

"Thanks mommy," Miranda replied, and this time Marissa was really interested in her still present squirminess.

She raised her eyebrows and peered at the kids who each wore a wide grin. "What's up guys? You seem awfully… jumpy."

"We have a surprise!" Gabby exclaimed, and both AJ and Miranda nodded enthusiastically.

"Well what is it?" Bianca asked them, sitting forward and Marissa followed as the kids jumped up and darted over to the Christmas tree. Marissa watched them go, fully expecting them to rummage through the piles of gifts and pull one out, but to her extreme surprise and confusion AJ, being the tallest of the three, reached up into the branches and pulled one of the ornaments down before handing it gently to Miranda. Marissa glanced over at Bianca and silently asked, _Are you following this?_ Bianca just grinned and returned her attention to the children. They made their way back over to the comfy pallet in front of the fire and Miranda showed the ornament to the couple.

"We made this for you," she explained quietly as she placed it gently in Marissa's hand. "We hung it on the tree a few days ago after we finished it. We hoped you wouldn't notice it."

"I didn't," Marissa whispered as she turned the ornament over in her hands, her chest expanding just like the Grinch's growing heart as she struggled to keep the tears away.

It was stunning. A two-inch glass orb sat on top of a circular golden base, obviously super-glued there by uneven hands. Inside the glass ball there was a tiny brown house with a pond in the back, both sitting on white rolling hills that ended in tall trees. As she looked closer she realized why the house seemed familiar, and one quick glance up at the beaming kids confirmed her guess – it was their house. The scene had been made from some sort of clay and then painted to match the real-life version, and the uneven and smudged lines of the paint immediately told her that the kids in front of her had done it themselves. The ball had then been filled with a water solution and white flecks floated around inside, snowing down plastic flakes on the house where her family lived.

Marissa closed her eyes against the swell of tears, unable in that moment to comprehend the beauty of the thing in her hand. She felt a warm hand on her shoulder and its size told her that it was Bianca's but still she couldn't open her eyes, instead leaning into her comfort as she allowed the blazing balloon in her chest to grow. _This is unbelievable,_ she thought inwardly, shaking the snow globe ornament gently as she opened her eyes a tiny crack, broken laughter erupting from her full heart as she watched the plastic snow cover her home.

"Do you like it mommy?" Gabby asked, leaning forward until she could look up into Marissa's eyes. "We wanted to give you something special."

"You did sweetheart," Marissa managed to say, slightly proud that the tears hadn't made their appearance yet. She felt Bianca's arms snake around her waist and pull her tight and once again Marissa eyes snapped closed to fight the tears again.

A small, warm hand covered hers and grasped something on the bottom of the base and Marissa opened her eyes to watch her son crank something in a circle, the familiar _click click click_ of the mechanism making her gasp just before the tune started playing. The smooth, quiet tones of "The First Noel" sounded from the base of the ornament and Marissa's hand flew up to cover her mouth.

"It's a music box too?" she asked quietly, her breath hitching slightly as she listened to the chiming tune of her favorite Christmas song. "How in the world did you guys make this?"

None of the children answered, instead only broadening their grins. "Read the bottom," Miranda told her, and slowly Marissa turned the ornament over.

The bottom was made from a smoothened piece of dark wood and across it someone had carved something. Marissa leaned closer to the fire so she could read it in the darkened room.

_Bianca + Marissa_

_+ AJ + Mimo + Gabby_

_= Love + Family_

And then there was nothing she could do to stop the tears. They flowed freely as she struggled to see through them to read and reread the carved inscription, the tinkling music filling her ears and the arms around her waist tightened further and she felt warm lips against her cheek and tiny hands on her knee, and she finally looked up to see all three of her beautiful bright children smiling so happily up at her. She opened her arms wide and they all struggled to smush themselves onto her lap, Bianca finally scooting back and around to envelope the kids in her arms as well.

Marissa didn't ever want to let go and she knew in that moment that she wouldn't, not really. She rested her cheek on Gabby's braided head and shared a long look with Bianca, whose eyes were filled with tears as well as they both held tight to the three angels in their arms. Finally AJ pulled away and sat back again, fixing his mother with another excited stare. "That's not all mommy," he said quietly, and Marissa laughed happily that he'd called her "mommy" again after he'd decided he was too old to keep doing it. AJ glanced down at the ornament in her hands and grinned crookedly. "Open it."

Miranda and Gabby nodded and looked back at the ornament too. Marissa lifted it again and peered at it, confused. "How does it open?" she asked.

"Just pull the glass part from the base," Bianca replied, and Marissa's eyes shot up to her girlfriend, completely stunned that she'd answered.

"How…?" she started to ask but Bianca just nodded and gestured toward the ornament again.

Hands shaking slightly with anticipation and also a little anxiety that she would break the spectacular gift, Marissa tugged lightly on the snow globe until she felt a tiny _pop_. Gently she eased the glass orb away from the base, seeing that the two were connected by a hinge. And then her breathing stopped completely and her entire body turned to stone as something sparkled from inside, it's silver edges catching the glow of the fire and sending tiny beads of light dancing across the inside of the base.

She blinked. And still her breath held and her arms stayed frozen around the thing in her hand. _Oh my god…_

The rustle of blankets caught her attention but didn't enable her to move or pull her gaze, and soon Bianca's hands settled around her own as they held tight to the open ornament. Her nimble fingers slid across Marissa's and pulled the ring from the box.

"Marissa," her gentle voice broke into the silence and Marissa forced herself to swallow. She closed her eyes as a silent flood of tears ran down her cheeks and she felt the ornament being lifted from her hands, and when she finally opened her eyes again Bianca sat before her, her legs crossed in their snowman pajamas, her hair tied back in pigtails to match her daughters, and those shining chocolate brown eyes filled with tears fixed only on her.

"You…" Marissa tried to speak but was incapable, and Bianca smiled warmly and took her left hand in hers.

"I asked for a little help to make this moment special," she explained.

"We wanted to help," AJ chimed in from behind her, but for the first time Marissa couldn't look at her son. She was too transfixed with the woman looking at her.

"Yes they did," Bianca agreed with a quiet chuckle, her eyes not leaving Marissa's either. "They worked tirelessly on the ornament. They wanted it to be perfect."

"It is," Marissa rasped on a shaky breath. It was all she could manage.

"I wanted it to be perfect too," Bianca went on, brushing a strand of hair from Marissa's eyes. Her touch sent a stinging tremor of chills cascading down the redhead's body and she shivered. "Because you're perfect Marissa. Perfect to me and for me anyway. Perfect in so many ways I can't even count them." She paused and drew in a long breath, letting it out in shaking waves and Marissa realized that she was nervous.

_Jesus – I'm making Bianca Montgomery nervous…_

Bianca lifted the ring in her hand and Marissa's stomach turned over like she'd just done a loop on a roller-coaster. "Marissa I've wanted to do this for so long I… I can't even remember the first time I thought of it. I've known I wanted – needed – to spend the rest of my life with you before we even kissed. I just know. I can't help it and I don't want to try. I love you. I love you so much it hurts my chest sometimes. I love you more with every breath you take and I want to marry you. I want to marry you and spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same."

"You already do," Marissa told her, her voice so overcome with emotion that it was almost inaudible. But Bianca heard and she smiled deeply as more tears tumbled down her cheeks.

It took her a moment before she found her voice again. "Marissa," she said finally, kissing Marissa's hand as she held it and the ring up, side by side. "Will you marry me?"

Marissa choked loudly, the expected words still sending her body into reactions she couldn't quite control. She nodded first, and then her shoulders started to hunch as she fought against the joyful sobs that pooled in her chest. Then her knees started to bounce up and down while her breathing became uncontrollably erratic, and after a few seconds of all this she was utterly overwhelmed and let herself loose, launching herself forward into her love's arms as her voice finally exploded from her throat. "YES!" she bellowed as she crashed against Bianca's shoulder, the two tumbling over into a mess of cushy pillows and blankets, their intense laughter joined by three tiny voices as Miranda, Gabby and AJ piled gleefully on top of them.

"I knew she'd say yes!" Miranda cried, she and AJ exchanging loud high-fives while Gabby squirmed her way under Bianca's arm.

"Of course I'd say yes!" Marissa agreed, her voice finally back with her as she tugged at the backs of Miranda and AJ's pajamas and they came crashing down between her and Bianca with elated giggles. "What else could I possibly say?"

"That's what I thought!" AJ giggled as Bianca tickled his stomach and he curled himself into a tight ball in defense.

"Give her the ring mommy!" Miranda cried, rolling herself out of the middle of the pile. AJ finally followed after making sure there wouldn't be any more tickle attacks, and Bianca happily leaned forward over Gabby and took Marissa's hand again. Their eyes met as Bianca pushed the ring onto Marissa's finger, and Marissa wasn't sure if her brain was getting enough oxygen as she watched and felt the ring slide into place.

Before the tears had a chance to come back again she grabbed Bianca's face and pulled her in, their mouths crashing together with such force that it rattled through their entire bodies. Bianca's hands snaked into glossy red hair as they embraced, and if not for the wriggling child in Bianca's lap Marissa likely would have never pulled away.

"YAY!" Gabby cried as the couple reluctantly pulled apart. "Mommies are getting married!"

"Ooh can you have a spring wedding?" Miranda asked as she scooted over to Marissa. She lifted the redhead's arm and draped it around her shoulders as she snuggled in closer and Marissa squeezed her tight. "I think you should get married in the park."

"Will I have to wear a suit?" AJ asked, standing up on his knees as he shuffled behind Bianca and leaned against her shoulder.

"We'll talk about all that soon guys," Bianca promised them with a smile. "But tonight it's Christmas Eve and we all need to get to bed. Santa's coming. And despite your excellent performance in helping me I can tell that you're all really tired. So come on – bed."

It took a few minutes for the five of them to disentangle themselves, nobody really moving all that fast anyway as hug after hug was exchanged. Finally the three exhausted children trudged up the stairs followed by their mothers, Gabby very nearly falling asleep on the floor of her bedroom but Bianca managed to steer her until she made it to her bed. After safely seeing Miranda and AJ into their rooms the rounds were made, Bianca peeking in on the older kids while Marissa went in to kiss Gabby goodnight.

"Bianca?" AJ whispered as Bianca had turned to leave. She turned around, surprised that AJ was in fact still awake.

"Yeah buddy?"

AJ sniffed loudly and burrowed into his covers. His eyes were still open though, reflecting the light from the hall behind Bianca as he gazed intently at her. "Thanks for loving my mommy," he told her sleepily. "And thanks for loving me. And for being around. I love you."

Bianca swallowed the lump in her throat as she tiptoed back across the carpet. She leaned over and kissed the top of his head fondly. "I just can't help myself buddy. You and your mom both are too good to be true. I love you." She knew AJ was still awake by the smile that spread across his face. He took a contented breath and rolled over. "Merry Christmas AJ," she whispered as she eased the door shut.

Hands were immediately around her waist and lips were gently kissing the back of her neck, and when Bianca slid her hands to cover Marissa's she smiled at the feeling of the engagement ring under her palm. "You're perfect," Marissa breathed against her skin and Bianca shivered violently at the feeling. Her knees started to wobble but Marissa held her steady. "I can't believe I get to marry you."

"Believe it," Bianca whispered back as she turned around, and before she was fully facing the redhead their lips crashed together in a hungry dance as arms worked to pull more tightly to the other.

Neither woman knew how long they stood there nor did they care. The only thing on their minds were the feeling of the other in their arms, the diamond ring on Marissa's finger, and the rest of their lives, intertwined.


End file.
